The next day was better... but also worse.
Better because it didn't rain, even though the clouds were gathered and cloudy. This is more convenient for me, because I am looking forward to this day. Baekhyun came to sit next to me in the national culture class, and the guy took me to the next class. Every time, whenever he sees us as "the grandpa of the chess club", Suho will follow Baekhyun's gaze; gave me a chance to show my face again. But today, people don't look at me as much as yesterday. At noon, I went to eat with a group of friends, there were Baekhyun, Jisoo and a few other friends – by now, their names and faces, I knew them all by heart. I started to feel that I could swim standing up, no longer feeling as weak as before.
The bad thing is that I still feel tired; I still can't sleep with the wind howling around the house. Even more frustrating because I didn't raise my hand to volunteer on the board, yet I was still assigned by Mr. Jaesuk, causing me to get the answer wrong. Another irony was that I had to play volleyball, and while trying to catch the ball, I let the ball hit one of my teammates in the head. And the worst part is that Kim Taehyung doesn't go to school.
All morning, I kept thinking about lunch in fear, afraid of his strange eyes for me. A part of me wants to confront Taehyung and ask him what's wrong with him. As I lay awake in bed, I tried to picture in my head what to ask. However, I know one thing that it takes a lot of courage for me to hope to do that. I have to turn the shy lion inside of me into a "terminator".
But when I walked into the cafeteria with Jisoo – I tried not to look where Taehyung was sitting, but finally couldn't help but feel my heart out – I noticed four of Taehyung's brothers sitting with me. a table, and Taehyung is nowhere to be seen.
Baekhyun stopped us and led us to his table. Jisoo was so excited because she felt cared about, her friends quickly joined us. They all chatted happily. But somehow, even though I tried my best to listen attentively to your stories, I still didn't feel comfortable at all, I kept on guarding my heart, worrying, waiting for the hateful person to come. I hope that when he arrives, he will not notice me.
Taehyung didn't come, the more time passed, the more my nerves became tense.
Stepping into biology class, I suddenly felt more confident, lunchtime ended, but the cold guy still didn't show up. Baekhyun was still enthusiastically walking beside me, he kept raving about the feats of his precious retriever. When I got there, I held my breath, Kim Taehyung was still not in class. Breathing a sigh of relief, I took my seat. Baekhyun still follows, at this time, Baekhyun's topic is the plan of the upcoming beach trip. Then he looked at me, smiled wistfully, and sat down next to a girl with wavy hair. Maybe I have to do something for Baekhyun, but it's not easy. In towns like that, where people "turn off the lights together", manners are extremely important. Meanwhile, I have never been skillful in my relationship with anyone; I don't know how to deal with overzealous boyfriends.
Anyway, Taehyung was absent from school, and I felt some relief from being alone. I kept chewing it over and over to comfort myself. Still, I can't get the thought out of my head that Taehyung isn't going to class because of himself. After all, it's a funny thing, have I been so egotistical that it gives rise to the idea that I've had a strong influence on others? It can't be like that. But why do I keep worrying about it if it's true?
Finally, a school day passed, followed by a volleyball accident that made me blush. I hurriedly put on my jeans and navy blue sweater, and hurried out of the changing room. Anyway, I feel a little happier when I temporarily avoid the guy who likes to gather information. Stepping into the crowded student parking lot, I climbed into the cockpit, reaching into my pocket to see what I had to do next.
Just last night, when I found out that my dad Bang can't cook other than an omelette with bacon, I was forced to suggest that during the time I've lived here, the The kitchen will be done by me personally. And my dad Bang was visibly pleased when he decided to entrust the cooking to me, at least. And then I realized that there was no real food in the house. I finally found a note of things to buy, along with some cash that Dad still kept in a jar with the note: Food money - put in the cupboard. Now, I will have to drive to Suncheon.
I started the deafening engine, ignoring the heads that turned to follow. Carefully, I backed up to the car lane, lined up, and prepared to pull out of the parking lot. While I was waiting like that, trying to pretend that the loud engine noise was from someone else's car and not my own, I saw the Kim brothers and the Jung twins walking get into the car. That's the brand new Volvo. Of course. Before, I didn't have time to pay attention to their costumes, because their appearance had me hypnotized. Only now have I had a chance to observe. No wonder they know how to dress elegantly and stand out; It's simple, but it can be felt that those outfits have a real designer. With an attractive appearance, plus the advantage of dressing style, even if they wear rags, they still look gorgeous as usual. They are really lucky when they have both money and beauty. But as far as I know, life is still the same, nothing is perfect, anyway, they are still unwelcome people here, apparently.
No, I don't quite believe it. It is they who create this isolation. I have never seen a door that does not open to receive beauty.
Like everyone else, they watched my car as I passed. I stared straight ahead, relieved to finally be out of the schoolyard. Suncheon is not far from where I study, just go south for a few more roads, then get off the highway to get there. Stepping into the supermarket, an old familiar feeling appeared. I bought all the necessary things for my family, happy that I could return to my old responsibilities. The supermarket here is also big enough that I don't have to hear the rain patting on the roof as a reminder of where I am. When I got home, I took out all the goods I bought; When I saw where I could keep it, I threw it all in. Hope dad doesn't get upset about this. Then I wrapped the potatoes, put them in the oven to bake, soaked the beef in the marinade, and put it on top of the egg carton in the fridge. When I'm done, I carry my bag of books upstairs. Before I start doing my homework, I have to change my clothes first. Finished, I untied my damp hair, which was tied up in a ponytail, and checked my e-mail. I have three messages.
"Amy" - that was a message from my mother - "...When you read these words, you must write to me immediately. Tell me how your flight was. Is it raining there? I miss you so much. I packed everything to go to Incheon, but I couldn't find the pink blouse. Do you know where I left it? Uncle Dan Tae says hello. Mom."
I let out a sigh and read the next message. The second message arrived eight hours after the first. "Amy" – still written by me – "...Why haven't you e-mailed me yet? What are you thinking? Mom."
And the third message was sent this morning: "Bang Amy. Until 5:30 pm this afternoon, I don't hear from you, I will call Dad." I check the watch. I still had an hour left, but my mother was known for doing everything before her appointment.
"Mommy,
Mom, calm down. I write right here. Mom, don't be angry.
Bella."
After sending these words, I started typing again on the keyboard.
"Mommy,
Everything is great. Of course it's raining. I'm thinking about what to write. School wasn't bad at all, just a little boring. I play with some good friends, they often have lunch with me. Mom's pink blouse from the dry cleaners - they told me to pick it up on Friday. Can you imagine, Bang's dad bought me a truck. I like it very much. It's old, but the machine is still very strong, mom, it's very good for me. I also miss my mother very much. I'll write to you again soon, but I can't check my e-mail every five minutes. Mom, calm down, breathe evenly. I love Mom.
Amy."
I decided to read Slow Down in the Rushing World (Korean novel) for fun, and then so on, I was absorbed in the book until Bang's father came home. It took quite a while, so I hurried downstairs, took out the potatoes, and put the beef in the oven.
- Amy? – Dad called when he heard my footsteps on the stairs.
Who else comes in here that I have to ask! I thought to myself.
- Ah, dad! Welcome back home dad.
"Thanks, son." Then Dad hung up the belt with the gun on it, took off my boots, and I went to work in the kitchen. As far as I know, Dad never had to pull out a gun and shoot. But my father always carried it with him. When I came here as a kid, every time I stepped over the threshold into the house, my dad would unload the bullets. Dad probably thinks I'm at an age where I can play with guns, so I have to avoid the risk that I'll shoot myself, not because I'm bored and take my own life.
- What are we going to eat tonight? ' Dad asked cautiously. My mother is an imaginative chef, her experimental products are not always edible. Dad's question surprised me, then I suddenly felt heartbroken, it seems that he often remembers the past that has become so old.
"Yes, beef and potatoes," I replied, and I noticed that Dad was less nervous. Standing empty in the kitchen, Dad became awkward, clumsy. After that, my father, in a timid manner, went out into the living room, watched TV, and left me to prepare the meal by myself. That solution automatically makes the father and son feel more comfortable. While the beef was cooking, I made the salad dressing and served it to the table. After finishing, I invited my father in to eat with me. Dad sniffed, praising me as soon as he entered the room:
- Wow! It's so delicious, Amy.
- Thank you, Dad.
Then we were silent. It's not that they don't feel comfortable, but both father and son are the type of people who like silence. Plus, there were many other things that made me realize that I fit in well with my dad under the same roof.
- How was your school today? Do you have many friends? – Dad was the first to break the silence.
- Um, I took a few classes with a friend named Jisoo. I often have lunch with her. There is a boyfriend named Baekhyun, he is very friendly. Everyone's very nice... ('Except for the one who hates', this sentence, I just whispered in my heart).
- It must be Byun Baekhyun - a good guy, well-organized family. His father owns a sporting goods store. Every backpacker who came here was sympathetic to him.
- Do you know Kim's family? – I asked somewhat shyly.
- Is that Doctor Kim Seokjin's family? Of course. Dr. Kim is a good person.
- They... the people he adopted... were a bit odd. They seem to be unpopular – Dad looks at me with surprise, an angry look – The people who live in this town are just... – Dad grumbled – Dr. Kim is an extremely skilled surgeon. , he is likely to work in any other hospital in the world, for ten times the salary he is getting here – Dad continued, voice getting louder – We are lucky to have him, fortunately his wife wants to live in a small province. Dr. Kim himself loves to help the community, and all the other children are also very obedient and polite. Honestly, at first, I also had a feeling of doubt when they first moved here, with their adopted children. I thought they were having a hard time teaching them. But those kids are all really grown up, they don't have a single blemish. I can say that they are more than children who are the descendants of grandparents and parents who have lived deeply in this tiny town. The members of Dr. Kim's family are always attached to each other in the true sense of family. Every weekend, they see them packing to go camping. It's just because they're new that people keep talking in and out.
Since I was a child, this is the first time I have heard such a long "discourse" from my father. Dad must have been very upset at what touched Dr. Kim's family.
"They're nice to me too." I quickly retracted my words. "I just saw that they weren't playing with anyone. They are all very attractive – I added, trying to celebrate the people who were winning over Dad.
"You should see the doctor," Dad replied, laughing out loud. "His marriage is very good. The nurses had a hard time focusing on their work when Dr. Kim was there.
We fell into silence again towards the end of the meal. Dad cleans the table, and I wash the dishes myself, there's no dishwasher. When it was over, Dad sat down with the TV, and I reluctantly went upstairs to do my math homework. What a true traditional house...
That night was completely quiet. I always slept until morning, tired.
The rest of the week is nothing special. I'm already familiar with all the classes. By Friday, I could easily recognize, if not the name, the face of most of my classmates. At gym time, my teammates not only catch the ball for me but also quickly move forward to cover when the opponent realizes my weakness and attacks.
Kim Taehyung still doesn't go to school.