There is nothing more monotonous than lying on a hospital bed. Of course, no one wishes to be there but I couldn't really help my situation, given that I had been abducted and physically abused.

Abused.

The memories still shake me to the core but not in a way that would leave me bleeding. Just like another nightmare, I had no problem letting it go.

They asked me how it had been. Not directly at least, fearing that I might be affected.

"You don't have to walk on egg shells around me, you know? I am not traumatized if that's what you fear."

I told Stellan a few days back, when I realized this whole deal took more toll on his behaviour around me than anyone else. He casually shrugged.

"I can't help it. It was something that would build fear in someone. Christ, but you were unconscious for days, Lia. And for all I know, you fear darkness the most."

I smiled. Of course, one of my many fears, or so I say, was darkness. Physical or mental. It was good he knew that. At least the prospect of any 'dark room' pranks were out of his mind, I hope.

"Yes, I do fear darkness, but I also know that light can't be contained for too long. Even in that state, I knew I'd find my way back home. And I did. Just like I did 17 years ago."

Stellan rolled his eyes.

"Oh come on Stel, I have been through a lot of things my fate threw my way. Don't worry so much."

His blue eyes began to burn darker as he raised his eyebrows.

"True, maybe you have. But going through one bad hand of fate doesn't mean that another won't hurt you. It will hurt, maybe less or maybe more, but it will. And your past can not and should not define the degree of hurt the future burdens on you. You're allowed to be hurt again. It's not something that demands a restriction. And probably that is why, it is one of the most devastating feelings to exist."

I raised my hands in defeat and sighed.

"There is never a way to go around you when you have set your mind, even if it's me we are talking about."

He smiled and cocked his head to the side.

"I wouldn't be so sure, but I am not one of the Brooke Falls Billionaire just like that."

I scrunched my nose.

"I hate that title."

"But you love me."

"I do."

I couldn't deny that, I never could. And I never would. It was a simple truth and I had no fear accepting that.

Even if dad stood beside me. My old man was too old to reign me anyways.

And so I spent another week, hooked to this hospital bed with nothing but boredom as my partner, because let's accept it, you can get bored seeing the same people all day.

I am not saying I love them any less but God would I love some fresh air. Or a paint brush as I might.

Today was probably my second last day at the hospital and on top of that, some special someone was coming to meet me.

No, it wasn't Robert Downey Junior. I hope he was but well, I would have to suffice with this douche bag of a friend and Bella.

"Ophelia, what do you think about cream walls for the kitchen?"

I looked away from the door and focussed myself on Bella who was sitting on the sofa close to the wall.

Other than the mount of people who wanted to meet me, Bella was the only one who seemed pretty relaxed around me. I don't blame them really, but I was also grateful to her for not treating me like a doll. Or a patient, which I am but minor details.

"I don't know. I think a lighter shade of brown works, given how your kitchen is designed." She nodded her head, engrossing herself back into her renovation.

She had been here almost weekly to check up on me, much like my family had. Thankfully, I was able to convince mom and dad to return to Crystal Lake, which was not easy, let me make it clear.

They both were resistant and I knew where they were coming from but I had already laboured them enough, especially mom and I knew very well that she can only ever be calm when she's home. Dad was hesitant too but I don't know what charm Stellan has worked. Albeit they were very resistant, they took his words for my proper care.

I mean what in the actual world did happen in my absence because suddenly, dad wasn't so opposed to the idea of me and Stellan. And mom? Well, she never really was. Picking him over me? I shouldn't be jealous but please, give me some slack.

My thoughts vanished as soon as the door to my room opened and I saw a handsome, dashing, annoying, asshole of a guy with a dazzling smile, standing with a bouquet in his hand.

"If it isn't Ace Ryan Reynolds, standing at me door with a bouquet. I am sorry but I can't marry you."

He acted of pucking and straight off denied my claims,

"Please Lia! As much as I love you, you're not my type."

I cocked my head. I missed him so much, as usual.

"Uh huh? So what's your type? Lillian?"

Bella swiftly muffled her laugh with a cough, eyeing me as I shrugged. I knew she wouldn't tell anyone. And to be very honest, Alice has already told her so not my problem.

Ryan, being the absolute evader he is, looked slyly at Bella.

"And who would this beauty be?"

Bella raised her eyebrows.

"Bella Nicholas Keys. Lia's friend."

He put the bouquet on the stand, took a seat and gave me a questioning look.

"Lia never mentioned you?"

I gave him an annoyed look.

"When do you ever stay in contact with people? And don't try it Ryan, she's married." Bella raised her ring finger, proudly showing off her ring.

I somehow felt that this news needed to be disclosed before Bella took down his ego.

"Well there goes my plans. But hey, you're still beautiful."

Bella chuckled as she bowed her head, her own way of thanking people. Then his attention zoomed back on me.

"So how has my best friend been doing? Last time I heard, you weren't doing so great."

I nodded.

"Well, I am patched up and everything, but other than that, I am good."

He smiled, his eyes scanning my face for any hint of discomfort or pain, to ensure I was not lying, but I shook my head, knowing well that he wouldn't find anything.

He took my word for it.

"But you tell me, how have you been? It's been what, five months since we talked?"

I gave him a condensing look as he raised his hands.

"Hey! It's not my fault. Well, not completely. My conscience hates attachment of any form. You know that very well."

Oh, I did. And I guess, probably that was one of the reasons why I was not affected by the constant lack of his presence. He was a man to dance to his own rhythm and I wouldn't let myself be someone holding him back.

"I know you very well. And that's also the reason why I am utterly confused as to why you brought a bouquet. What am I? Dying?"

He sat up straight and Bella huffed.

"You don't get to say that, Ophelia."

I muttered a sorry to Bella.

"Well given the situation, you weren't any better, babe. And also, seeing how you were being treated I thought I might as will bring you a gift."

I gave him a blank stare.

"When did you start thinking anyways? And have you not heard? I am the most expensive commodity in Brooke Falls right now. Might as well gift me a castle."

I knew what was brewing outside the four walls of this room. People tried to hide it but media isn't very far away though. I had a television in the room for crying out loud. And the constant pings of my phone didn't really help.

My new phone, might I add, the one gifted by Stellan, one of the more insignificant gifts among the various other things he has given me.

To be very honest, I didn't like the fact that I required all this. The constant attention, the care, the resources, the medical help!

Yes, I would have been very, very casual had it been dad. I mean, I am his daughter, it's his responsibility. But somehow when Stellan does the same things for me, it doesn't seem like a duty.

It's not his fault. He is doing everything in his power to make me feel like I am his priority and I will give him that. He has made me feel every bit of it, until I realized what all was going around when I was too lost in my consciousness.

He had been so drained. Even when I woke up, he looked so tired. Extremely happy but tired. And I fear if that is what loving me would do to him. Will it?

And even if it doesn't, I can't live with the fact that everything that I touch right now is probably first looked at by Stellan. He has been so precautious.

Well at least the hospital bills aren't paid by him. I hope they aren't. Dad has enough to ensure a generous treatment for me, but with the picture that I have painted in my mind, I am not so sure.

Yes, he means the world to me right now but I do not want us to destroy or neglect everything else. They tried to hide a lot of things from me, but social media and the wonders it does!

He was on the verge of losing Walker Groups, his own god damn company. What even was he thinking? Yes, I am important to him, perhaps more than I should be, but if I had seen the ruins of the Walker Group once I woke up, realizing it was all because of me, I would have slept back again.

Because there was no way in hell I would let him burn his dreams to ashes and build my own self on it. That was just unacceptable to me.

Fortunately, things didn't go out of control. Ian got him back to his senses, I don't know how. But this just leaves a tiny fear in my heart and a certain bitterness on my tongue when I feel even the slightest of obligation someone has towards me.

Stellan almost lost his everything to me and I know I would probably do the same too. But that is what I have started to fear — his immense power to love, which would burn the world around me but not let a flame touch me. Little does he realises that he was burning his world and won't even realise when the flames engulf him too.

And that was something I had to talk to him about. He needed to put his head at a sensible place soon and not be so lost the next time anything like this happens. But I felt that talk could still be given time. He wouldn't listen to me anyways, his guard was too high. Not for me, but for anything revolving around me.

"I...I didn't mean it that way, Ophelia. You know I am not the one to show. I felt like bringing flowers and so I did. If you don't like them, I'll remember the next time."

My heart fell at the melancholy tone of his voice. I need to reserve my bitterness to myself. This whole ordeal is no one's fault. Well, except Keller's, but he is six feet under the dirt so I could care less. I sighed.

"I am sorry Ryan. I didn't mean to hurt you. I love the flowers. It's just...it's all been so much for me. It's just...not something I am used to or ever will be."

"And the media isn't making it any easier on her. Yeah, she says she's not watching the news but I know a lie when I hear one."

My gaze betrayed me as I looked at Bella. She knew what I felt like. She was the only one I have given even the slightest hint of what's cooking in my head and unfortunately, she realized what it is. Ryan patted my hand.

"Now there, there. It's alright babe. You never have to be sorry for me. You mean too much for me to say that. Plus, how could you be angry at this handsome face."

Whatever amount of ache I had in my heart vanished as I gave him a bored look.

"There goes the moment."

He grinned.

"Oh! So we were having a moment? What, you wanna hug it out?"

He was pain in the ass.

"Know what Ryan, fuck off."

And I don't remember how the day was spent so quickly, with Ryan by my side, as he shared his glorious adventures, as he says, and a few incidents of my own sphere. Bella had left a few hours into his arrival, satisfied that I would not be bored in his presence.

"I hope I am not interfering."

Stellan grinned as he entered, his hair all over the place and he himself was looking like a meal. Sadly, I was told no hard meat for some time. Poor fucking me.

"Of course you did, I was about to sweep your lady off her feet. I mean, look at me!"

Stellan flipped him off as he planted a kiss on my forehead.

"Oh the love you have for us." Ryan muttered as we three engaged ourselves in a small chat before it was his time to leave. His ass came to Brooke Falls for a single day. I would be lying if I said I didn't feel loved but he needs to set his feet firm here for some time too, and sort things out with his dad. But that's a talk for another day. Another hour well spent and he was ready to leave.

"Come and meet others sometime, Ace. We miss you. So does your dad. It's your home, buddy. Let yourself roam here too someday."

Ryan's face fell a little, a somewhat sad smile on his lips. It seemed to me that he had accepted his fate long ago and was in no hurry to change his ways. But he cannot always hide the pain he carried. But I was happy to know that he had some people he still could be vulnerable around.

People who have a heart big enough to be called home are becoming rare these days and to be vulnerable around someone was to give them a power that was self-destructive but we did it anyways, because as they say, home sweet home.

I kissed Ryan on the cheek, my smile telling him that I would love to have him here, but he can always rely on me to let him go. He hugged Stellan and mumbled something in his ears that drained his face off colour. What did he say?

"See you soon, Ophelia. And you too Stellan. You have a long night ahead!" He winked my way and was gone before I could ask him why his tone left an unsettling feeling in my stomach.

"What did he tell you?" I asked Stellan, my tone sweet but sharp. I wasn't beating around the bush and he knew he shouldn't either.

He sighed as he massaged his neck, exhaustion taking all his guards down. Seeing him that way made me realize that even if I wasn't ready for what was to come next, I had to be gentle. He has been strained lately anyways.

"Hey, you can tell me. I won't be mad."

Stellan gave me questioning look. Yeah, I wasn't so sure either if I would not be mad but I could try.

He squared his shoulder, perhaps ready for another war, and sat on the chair right next to me.

"So you know, you're being discharged in two days..."

I tightened my hold as his fingers filled the gap between mine.

"Not two days. I am getting discharged in about forty hours to the most."

He gave me a confused look.

"It's literally eight hours short of two days, love!"

"Please, I am not staying a single hour extra. I am going back home. And I swear to God, if this stay is extended and they sent you as the messenger, thinking I would let you go, they are heavily mistaken."

He chuckled.

"Thankfully, no. You're clear to go back home now. There's no doubt in that."

I relaxed.

"Although the question is where exactly home is right now?"

Too early I guess.

"My apartment, Stellan. Where else?"

I made every word very clear because being smart and in love with him made reading him fairly easy. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and looked back at me. The resolution in his eyes made me realize I might have to give up this time.

"Your apartment is not apt for your condition right now."

"It has been apt so far and it always will be. I am not staying at the Walker mansion and that's final!" I crossed my arms as I looked at him in retaliation.

I saw this coming. To put it out, no one would really want me to stay alone all day. I needed to have someone look at my bandages, my diet and my medication. While the diet and medication was not a difficult part, the bandages were. The bandages have been reduced from heavy, ointment loaded pads to more simpler healing bandages, but they were all over my body and I wasn't sure if I could reach all those places without causing much pain to my stitches.

I thought my stay would be extended but the doctor said that I didn't need to worry about that. I just needed to be given more attention than I usually was in my regular life and a nurse would visit me once a day to look at my bandages. Of course, I was given the option of a full time nurse but I was not comfortable with someone hovering over me in my own house. And that's why I wrote down my address in the requirement box. A daily visit or visit once in two days sounded better than anything else. And as far as the food was concerned, that could be managed. Hell, I was even allowed to work from home before I could physically set my feet in my office after a few more days of bed rest. Luckily, my job was still intact. But given that I was all over the news channel, it was not hidden that my leaves were for actual health issues. Health calamity more like.

"What's so wrong about my home?" I gave him a glare.

"Nothing is wrong with your home, Stel. It is as lovely as it can be. But I am not throwing another burden at you."

He straightened himself and narrowed his eyes.

"This seems like a talk we need to have. Burden? Out of all the things you are to me, you think one of them would be a burden?"

I rubbed my forehead. This talk came sooner than I expected.

"Well not exactly but I am nothing less than that right now."

He looked annoyed, to put it mildly.

"Why would you even get that idea? I get that the media is exaggerating everything but since when have you started listening to crap that people talk about."

"I am not just listening to them. I see it every day, the way you're throwing your life and accomplishments for me!"

He put a finger up.

"Okay! I might have been a little careless regarding the company but I knew what I was doing. I don't know what you give me credit for but you often say I am one of the smartest guys you know so what happened to those words?"

I felt the anger bubble inside him as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You need to understand that I would lay the world down for you. And I don't care if you think you deserve it or not, because you're worth every storm in this world and that's enough of an excuse for me to treat you like the best thing that ever happened to me. You want it, good! If you don't, well then learn to love yourself, Ophelia because I can love you all I want but that will never be enough if you still think we don't deserve each other."

I looked at him and cast my eyes down. A tense silence fell over us. And it wasn't letting me breathe.

"You...you really think we deserve each other?"

My voice broke at the end as I realized what was coming. Seems like it's been long since Lilith last met me.

He didn't say anything for a few moments. And somehow, that was a reassurance. He wasn't blindly going to say something just because he loves me. It made me realize another reason why I was knee deep into him. He would never just give me a simple answer. If he said something, it was a genuine and well thought reply, even if it was something that could easily sway his heart away. So, I knew that even if he loved me, he still had some power over his heart. And if someday, god forbid, someday it breaks down and I am not here, he will be okay. Somehow, he'll find his way through. Even if the world said that he was too enchanted by me and was losing himself, he still had his roots strong and this realization relieved the tension that had been nagging me for days. But it didn't mean the question was any less significant.

He drew in a breath and held my hand gently, too gently.

"Ophelia, do you remember the things I said when for the first time I told you that I loved you?"

I chuckled.

"A lot of things were said that night, babe. But yes, I remember it very vividly."

"So I want you to know that despite what all I said night, I love you because I deserve to love someone who understands what it can do to a person. The world has put you through hell and yet you wake up every day because you believe in the love that Rose carried in herself as she looked after you. Or the love your dad has for his family. Or even the love Ian and Allison have. I don't love you just because I want to love you, but because I know that loving you, putting my heart in your hands, will always, always guide me back to myself. And to my reality that someone out there, a girl with thunder in her eyes and fire in her soul, a girl who thought she was too tainted to be loved, loves me back. Maybe not as much as I do today, but someday she will. And if there is someone I want to be loved by, even if a figment of it, then it will be you."

He touched his forehead with mine as I closed my eyes, my tongue too heavy to form words.

"Because you can love so, so much, Ophelia. How will you even know that? You have an ocean of every human feeling ever felt and you leave these constellations in your wake, more than I can handle. And that's why I want to be loved by you. And you will love me. I have no doubt. I deserve that, oh, I deserve it so much. And I will not let my chance go. So there is no way you will not love me. Because yes, we deserve each other. But more than that, we were made to love just one another. I don't think I can love anyone else now. And I am glad I can't. Because I don't want to."

I opened my eyes to find that his was still closed, his breathes heavy. I pecked his lips in an instance, not that I didn't wish to ravish his lips, but I had my own things to say. His eyes opened in surprise.

"I...I just don't want you to lose yourself. You love me all you want because that is what teaches me to love myself too. But just don't run out of love for yourself, Stellan. In this quest to measure the depth of my ocean, I don't want the ocean in you to dry up. The world is too indulged in our lives. And I do best to not pay heed. But I am only human and love you more than I know my own self but please, don't ever blindly put everything at stake. Even for me. You have a world on your shoulders. You share that weight with me, not let it to ground. Do not let someone destroy what you build out of your skin and bones."

He wiped a tear streaming down my eyes as I kissed his hands.

"That's your lesson in the path of love, Stellan. I will love myself. Damn it, I do right now. But I will loathe myself if you lose something because of me. And something tells me, you don't want that."

He chuckled, a broken laugh misted by the tears in his eyes.

"I am sure you'll be there to keep reminding me that."

I lightly pinched him.

"I am not leaving you anytime soon. And maybe the world might think I am high maintenance, I won't question your care as long as you let me take care of you too. I can count the grey hair in your head now, Walker."

He hummed.

"Oh, I am all yours. You can take care of me anytime, anywhere or well any part of me."

I narrowed my eyes.

"Yeah, get away. The Walker mansion is still not down my throat."

He rubbed his neck. What the fuck is it now?

"You see, my home was never in question. I was thinking of somewhere else, closer to my office so I could reach you anytime."

I gave him a flat look.

"What did you do? Buy me a fucking mansion now? I will fucking kill yo—"

"I was actually thinking about my own apartment. The one near the office? Rings a bell?"

Of course it rang a bell. I had been there. Too many times. I gave him an exasperated look. The mansion was something I wouldn't easily agree too, given it was homing his family and already under too much scrutiny and it would be hard to pull the media away. In the light of that, the condo didn't seem like that bad of an idea. But this man has got to keep me updated.

I raised my eyebrows.

"You have a lot of explanation to do. But let me kiss you properly first. It's been too long and you've been too far."

He smirked.

"Gladly."

I mean I still had a day in the hospital, might as well get all that I could.

Hi guys! It's been so long! I know, I know. It's my fault for being late but I plead forgiveness. The thing is that given my last year in school, we students have a lot of things to deal with. I'm sure y'all relate. My college applications are there too. SO MANY EXAMS, I CAN'T-

And with all that is going around in the world, I just wanted to make y'all happy in some way, even if it makes you smile a little.

Stay safe, guys. Stay home and ensure hygiene. We will get through this, together 💜💜

I'll try to update soonish? I mean I'll try-