"-and where is my room?"

"You have an entire wing of the castle to yourself," I grumbled, exhausted after nearly five hours of being grilled by Levi over the details of his life.

i know more than i ever wanted to know

"Correct," he nodded, glancing at the watch on his wrist.

oh

"You're going to have to take that off when we get there," I pointed out, sinking down in my chair, "I don't wear watches."

where did he even get that

"What do you do?" He muttered under his breath, taking it off.

"Avoid you, look hot, the list goes on," I trailed off.

"For someone that spends a third of her time trying to avoid me I see you a shit ton," Levi scoffed.

...

"Not my fault you're desperate and obsessed with me."

you're the one who runs after me begging for things at every single event we're at

"Well you could just stay inside- then neither of us would have to see each other."

"Wooooww Levi Ackerman is advocating for my imprisonment."

"I didn't say that."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"You're a child."

"Whatever," I flipped him off, glancing out the window. "Is there anything else I need to know about your life before we arrive?"

i feel like we've only covered boring details

"I-" he paused, frowning slightly. "I know you think I'm an asshole but most people like me, don't fuck that up for me."

HUH...

"WHO???"

"Shut the fuck up."

"I'm seriously curious- I know that people think you're attractive but I've never heard anyone say 'oh my god levi is soooooo nice' it's always 'omg don't you think that levi's cold personality seriously suits his visuals.'"

maybe that was a bit mean-

"You're biased."

"Maybe," I shrugged, "don't worry I'm not going to ruin your reputation, I'm not a horrible person."

"Could've fooled me."

"I hate you, I don't hate other people."

i get absolutely no joy from messing with people who aren't levi

"You're the worst."

"Now who's being a child?"

"Idiot," he rolled his eyes at me, glancing outside for a moment, "we're almost there."

oh wow

"I'm getting all nervous now, what if your mom doesn't like me?"

"She doesn't need to like you," he paused. "I would prefer it if she didn't."

"Why? Worried that I might steal her from you?" I grinned.

my goal is to steal everyone from you levi

"As if-"

"Just wait I'm going to become her best friend <3"

more than that would be ideal

"You do realize that I'm telling her who you are as soon as we get there," he grumbled.

well of course

"As if that will stop me."

WAIT A MINUTE

"It will."

"HAVE YOU BEEN SHITTALKING ME TO YOUR MOM???"

ASSHOLE

"As if you don't do the same exact thing."

you've activated my trap card

"My mom is dead."

"Fuck."

"You feel like shit now don't you," I chuckled, nudging him with my foot. "Good."

"I hate you."

that's fine

"I hate you even more."

"You totally shit-talk me to your dad."

oh well-

"I refuse to answer that question."

"Exactly- we're even."

"No not really at all-"

i mean YOU pushed me to my death so i'd say we're anything but even

"We're even."

"I saved you from sitting on the side of the road until your carriage got fixed, what have you done for me?"

"You only did that because you wanted to start dating rumors."

how did you know-

"I did that because I'm a kind, considerate, gorgeous, young lady who cares about the wellbeing of everyone she happens across."

"Kind? Could've fooled me."

this back-and-forth gets exhausting

"Any other pressing details about your life you need to tell me about?"

"Farlan's- never mind."

HIS WHAT ??

"Are you two in love?" I blurted without thinking, quickly receiving the most incredulous stare I had gotten the entire carriage ride.

"We aren't, and if we were that wouldn't be your business."

"You wouldn't tell me if you were dating someone? Levi, we swapped bodies- what am I supposed to do if someone comes up and tries to kiss me?"

I MEAN DEPENDING ON HOW HOT THIS PERSON IS I WLD JUST GO FOR IT

BUT IM ALSO A HUGE FAN OF FUCKING THINGS UP

if you didn't know by now

"No one is going to come up and kiss you."

"Levi Ackerman is bitchless."

"Vulgar."

"Says you."

"Do I need to be worried about strange people kissing me?"

"I would appreciate it if you didn't totally ruin my image, I'm still interested in falling in love once we swap back."

so far that has been difficult due to certain rumors

"You're expecting random people to kiss you?"

"No, not really but I wouldn't be surprised if someone wanted to. Actually, could you maybe run it by me before you go through with it?"

"Forget it- I'm not kissing anyone for you."

"Why not? Might be a good experience, I have a hard time believing that you have a lot of practice."

"You'd be surprised."

"You're right, I would."

"Don't get any ideas," he grimaced.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ME???

"What ideas could I possibly be having?"

i mean it would be kinda funny to start forwarding everyone i've ever turned down to your doorstep

"You seem like the kind of person to send a horde of suitors to my doorstep."

"How did you know?"

"You're predictable."

"Die."

"A threat to the future Duke Ackerman? Bold of you."

"Right now you're the future Marchioness, calm down."

i could just run away with your body and never give it back

"Don't you want you body ba-"

"Excuse me," Farlan coughed loudly from outside the carriage, "we've arrived."

oh

"Behave in front of my mother," Levi turned to me, an earnest look in his eyes.

i almost feel bad

"How much are you going to pay me?"

"Behave."

"Jeez- don't get too pissed off about it, I'm not going to do anything."

"Somehow I don't trust you."

"The feeling is mutual."

____________________

if you couldn't tell one of my absolute favorite things to write is banter like this- I can't get enough of it

hope you guys are doing well

- ami