Chapter 11: The Desire
Her parents and older sister Yoko welcomed Faye very warmly. After dinner, Yoko's mother was very hospitable and peeled fruit for her to eat. Such a scene made Faye couldn't help but exclaim why Yoko was such a pure-hearted girl, she was loved and protected very well by her family.
Neko, Yoko's older sister, is quite a cheerful and friendly person. She was chatting while picking fruit for Faye.
"Sister Faye, last time Yoko received the movie script, she couldn't eat or sleep all night."
"Neko! What are you saying?" Yoko cried out, arching her back, reaching out to her sister to stop, but to no avail.
"Obviously, you didn't even show me the script, haha" Neko laughed happily
Faye sat there watching the two sisters bickering and smiled, "The script isn't worth mentioning. So Yo is probably just worried." With her parents present, no matter how bold Faye was, she didn't dare say more about the script.
"Neko, stop teasing her." Yoko's father had no choice but to stop her older sister from teasing her younger sister any further.
Yoko didn't pay any attention to her sister anymore, she turned to chat with her parents and scrolled through her phone. Suddenly she saw something on her phone, so she paused a bit and her eyes became thoughtful.
Faye noticed that from that moment on, she stopped talking and smiling.
After a while, Yoko's parents sent both of them back to their room. The reason was to let guests like Faye rest early. But the real reason was probably because they knew their daughter's bedtime was early, so they wanted both of them to rest.
Upstairs, Yoko was quiet. She whispered goodnight to Faye and then went back to her room.
After taking a shower and changing into her pajamas, Faye lay on the bed, thinking about Yoko's behavior just now and still feeling very strange. She picked up her phone, wondering whether she should text her to ask her how she was doing. But after composing the message and deleting it, Faye finally composed a message that couldn't be more polite and sent it.
'Thank you for the evening, my family. Good night.'
It was almost 11pm, Faye thought Yoko was asleep. But a moment later there was a reply message.
'Are you asleep yet?' Along with that was a worried icon from her, through the message I could feel that she had something to say.
'This girl' Faye shook her head. Then she got up and walked to the connecting door of the two rooms and knocked.
Yoko heard and immediately jumped up and went to open the door. When she opened the door, she saw Faye sitting down in front of the door, her hair was long and loose from washing, Faye was wearing a simple dark blue pajama, but it still couldn't hide her full body inside the shirt. Faye waved to Yoko, so the two of them sat right on the doorstep facing each other.
Yoko's room is modern in style, bright in color, and the lights in her room are on, creating a very bright and youthful feeling.
Faye's room was darker, with antique wood tones and dimmed yellow lights, giving it a mature and mysterious feel.
Two people sitting cross-legged facing each other. The conversation posture is very contrasting.
"Did you see something funny just now?" Faye asked with concern.
Yoko bowed her head slightly, then slowly opened her phone to show Faye what she had seen. It was the video that fans had recorded during Faye's fan meeting the day before. The content cut right to the part where fans were a bit worried about Yoko's ability when participating in the movie. And also the recording of how Faye answered.
"Are you worried about this clip?" Faye leaned her shoulder against the door frame, pushed her hair up so it wouldn't block her eyes, looked straight at Yoko and asked
"I didn't mean to let it influence me," Yoko said honestly.
"But why are you still affected?" Faye gently adjusted a few strands of hair on her forehead.
Yoko puffed out her rosy cheeks slightly, bowing her head as if she had done something wrong: "I was afraid I would disappoint you." She sat with her knees drawn up and curled up, still not raising her head to look at Faye.
Faye looked at Yoko thoughtfully. Then she changed her position, leaning against the door frame, her right finger tapping lightly on the floor while thinking, Faye's eyes slightly closed, her long eyelashes trembling. This was Faye when she needed to analyze anything carefully.
Yoko was a very confident girl by nature. She was born into such a family and grew up in the love of everyone. When it came to confidence, she definitely had the qualities to be number one. But time and time again, Faye could feel the anxiety and nervousness in her words. This was not the first time she had said something that she was afraid of disappointing Faye. Not knowing what problem she had that made her so unsure of herself, Faye was a bit curious, because clearly a girl with such qualifications and qualities, could not possibly be so pressured by the fear of making mistakes.
Faye thought for so long that Yoko's heart gradually beat faster like a drum. She didn't know since when she was always afraid that she had done something wrong, the pressure that she had disappointed others. She secretly raised her head to look up and wait, a few seconds later Faye opened her eyes slightly, sat up straight and looked deeply into Yoko's eyes. This was probably the first time the two of them were so close. Then Faye began to speak the words that had been carefully thought out in her heart, her voice gentle and gentle.
"You have to understand that, from the day you and I accepted the film and signed that three-party agreement, we have been in a position where we can be criticized and questioned every day. Criticism will come from many sides, people who follow you, follow me, and even people who don't know who we are. The film we are about to make is not a normal film, and certainly not a mainstream gay film like recently. But because of that Three-Party Agreement, it will push the film to a whole new level. And there, if we go the right way, we will succeed, if we take one wrong step, we cannot turn back. This is a very important film in my career, in order to prove myself, I need it to be successful.
Imagine that between you and me, we are not just acting in a movie anymore, but we have to see ourselves as movie characters. Movie characters go through joys, anger, love and hate, so do we. Movie characters go from strangers to lovers, so we also have to reach the similarity of that line. Producers don't just want to sell movies, they also want to sell our interactions in real life. So you can't be afraid.
You can feel pressured, you can cry, laugh, even suffer, you can tell me that you are too tired, that you don't know if you can do it, I will overcome it with you. But above all, you cannot be afraid, you cannot retreat. Both you and I have no right to give up anymore. People with bad intentions and negative influences will exist every day. There will be more and more doubts and questions about your abilities on the internet with each episode. Today, I saw it, I cared about you and discussed it with you to solve it. But if it were another day, another time, I would have had to face the above information alone. I couldn't let them see how worried and depressed I was.
The country has approved gay marriage, but that doesn't mean people like me are completely free. A gay movie with such a perfect fanservice plan will either be an unexpected success or a miserable failure. Do you want to fail one day, not because you lack acting skills, or because you don't work hard. But because we don't appreciate life inside and outside of the role. Are you willing to accept that?"
"..." No, Yoko hadn't had time to answer when Faye continued speaking.
"I'm not satisfied. The script is for the movie, the Tripartite Agreement is for real life, I want both the fish and the bear paw. I want the movie to be successful, and everything we do according to the Agreement must be perfect. Are you afraid that I will be disappointed? It's true that I will be extremely disappointed if we give up because of our own lack of strength. But I won't be disappointed if we did our best but because of some external factor, it didn't succeed.
Like my fans said in the clip you saw. They were afraid that you would drag me down. But Yoko, if something happens, I'll be the one who suffers more. I'm not saying that you won't be hurt, but I'm the one who's betting more here. I'm not afraid and I chose you in the casting that day, so what are you worried about?"
Yoko sat curled up, her arms hugging her knees, her head bowed, causing her long hair to cover her eyes. She quietly withdrew into her own world. Her heart was screaming like waves, wanting to say that she wasn't worried, she wasn't under pressure, but in the end, silence still prevailed. Just as Faye had guessed, no matter how happy she was on the outside, there were still hidden corners inside that prevented her from being as confident as she used to be. She shrank even more and clenched her fists.
Suddenly Faye raised her hand and stroked Yoko's head, she stroked her hair very gently, slowly and peacefully.
"According to the Tripartite Agreement, when you are sad, I have to pat your head, hold your hand, or hug you, whether it is public or private. And the agreement clearly states that I am not allowed to make you sad." Faye smiled gently, still stroking her hair to comfort her: "So it turns out that I violated the agreement."
Hearing that, Yoko didn't raise her head but still shook her head vigorously to show that 'You're not'.
"Let's make a bet?" Faye said.
"Yes?" Yoko looked up, her eyes red.
Seeing her eyes, Faye sighed inwardly: "Let's make a bet, if you disappoint me. You will lose and have to listen to one of my conditions. And vice versa, if I lose, the same thing will happen, okay?"
Yoko took a deep breath and blinked, she completely understood that Faye said this to distract her and make her less worried. She tried to put on her usual smile, raised her pinky finger and made a pinky gesture: "Promise."
"Yeah, promise."
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