Author's Note: thanks for all the votes and wonderful comments. It really kept me going on this. So, we've come to the final chapter, hope you enjoy it. : )

Chapter 10

"But I don't remember anything," I said loudly, waving my hand about. "Don't you think it's high time we do something about it?"

Phun sighed and gave in to me. "What do you want us to do? The last time we tried to force it, it didn't exactly work."

We were in my room and sitting on the bed which was the only other place to seat besides the floor. My room was a typical student room with the bare necessities: a bed, some vanity things and a flat screen TV and game set.

I pouted at Phun and looked away while I thought.

"Just give it time Noh."

I have already given enough time; it's 'time' to actually do more. I don't like this feeling. Whenever there was something I was supposed to know about without being told, I don't know. I feel like an impersonator. I feel like I am pretending to be Phun's boyfriend, Noh.

Phun really loves Noh—I mean me. He comes to visit me every day, buys things for me even when I don't ask, knows all I want and always makes me happy. He knows me inside out and I love it, but I can't do the same with him. Normally, people who are in a relationship take their time to know each other, but while I was still at the take-our-time stage, Phun has already gone three years ahead. I can't keep feeling like this anymore.

"I want to try now, Phun. It's already been two months since we got out of the hospital. If we don't try now then I might never get my memory back."

Phun opened his mouth but he stopped himself from saying what he wanted to say. "Okay, fine." He dropped his hands in obvious defeat. "How do you want to do it?"

Phun has told me nearly everything about what happened between us in all these three years. While it was a good story, it never triggered any memory. I love the things that Phun tells me about us, I want to experience them too, but I can't unless I remember.

"Let's try going to the places in our memories," I said, livened up by the prospect of doing something productive towards this problem.

Phun didn't look quite lively, "didn't we already try that when we went to Hua Hin?"

I glared at him, what was he contradicting me for? "There are many other places, and maybe Hua Hin didn't have as much as emotional impact as we would find elsewhere."

"Like where?"

If he doesn't like my idea he could just say so. I answered with difficulty, "I don't know, maybe our old school? We spent nearly all our time there."

He heaved this heavy sigh that irritated me so much, I felt like a pissed cat. "Noh," he left it at that, probably when he saw that I was lifting a fist to hit him.

We stared at each other. "Let's just do it okay," I said

"Yeah, if it is important to you."

So what, it isn't important to him? I decided not to bitch about that and just roll with it. Phun must be feeling a little stressed out with me. I do give him a lot of trouble.

When we got to my old high school I couldn't recognize it. It looked so old and worn down that I almost wanted to ask if it was the right place. I remembered the basket ball court and how it used to be so crowded during the breaks.

I was smiling as we walked around. School was on vacation so Phun and I were the only ones moving. I often chuckled as I remembered some past antics me and my friends used to get up to around here.

I climbed the bleachers and looked back at Phun standing below. "Is this the place?"

"Yeah," Phun had a wry smile.

"Where you shouted your undying feelings to me," I was smirking at him. He met my eyes and laughed a little.

"You said you liked me first," he said and I nodded. "You said I am the only guy you ever liked."

Nothing was coming to me. I sat on the highest step and imagined the whole thing. It played like a movie in my head. I guess that should satisfy me, but it didn't.

"Let's go somewhere else," I got down and walked past Phun but he grabbed my arm.

"Noh, let's take a break."

"What, we just started. "

"Let's get that snack you like and drink something cool."

I sighed and nodded. Phun tries his best but why does he keep treating me like this. What is up with him?

We stopped at a restaurant instead and when I gave Phun an inquiring look, he told me he hasn't eaten anything all day. We go inside the restaurant and sat down. Phun looked at me pointedly, what did he want now? Just when I began to cuss at him it clicked.

I turned around on my seat. This was the same restaurant Phun and I used to frequent. It didn't look expensive at all, just a roadside store. I pictured Phun and me sitting on one of the tables laughing. It must have been so much fun.

"Anything?" he asked.

I shook my head while keeping a smile plastered to my lips. I didn't want Phun to see how much this was affecting me. "Let's eat," I said.

He asked nothing else and we ate in almost silence. I guess I tried to be hopeful and filled with high spirits but every time we go somewhere in our past and I can't even catch a glimpse of myself or Phun, I felt my smile becoming less frequent till I couldn't keep up the positive match anymore.

When we stopped at Phun's class, he said, "Noh, we should go back home, it's already getting late."

A bulb suddenly lit in my head. "I'm a fool," I slapped my head making Phun grab my hand in a surprise. "Why didn't I think of it, we should have gone to the house?" My smile could have split a thousand seas. How did I not think about the most important place I was likely to remember everything? The house Phun and I abandoned a month ago.

Phun didn't argue with me. He was letting me drag him around on what he very likely thought was a hopeless journey. I don't want to think it, but Phun doesn't look like he cared one bit whether I remembered or not. I wasn't sure how to felt about that.

We drove, well Phun drove to the house. I am still banned from driving my motorcycle, just like old me was. I have no idea why I bought it if it was just going to seat in the garage forever.

As we were driving to the house, I made a fuss about wanting to drive the car myself. Phun is so messed up for treating me like a girl. We were being a little crazy and it was a little dangerous, still there was no need for Phun to snap at me.

He yelled, "Stop it Noh!" so loudly it felt like a clap of lightening right next to my ear. I pulled away and stared at him.

Phun calmly took a breath and said, "I'm sorry, let's just drive safely, okay?"

I wanted to give him some of my meanest swear words, but then I noticed his hands shaking.

"Phun," I said. "Are you okay?"

He looked at me and smiled shakily, then he reached out and rubbed my hair, "don't worry about it, Noh. I didn't mean to yell at you."

Despite the front he was putting, I could see that Phun was spooked. I took the hand in my hair and held it, "Phun, pull over for a minute," I said.

He did so without persuasion and we got down. I started to talk to him, mostly about my band and how I was going to be a superstar. He better treat me better because soon people are going to start falling for my awesomeness left and right. He laughed and said he would protect what belongs to him. Who belongs to you, big head!

He pulled me to him and pressed our heads together sideways, his arm over my shoulder and whispered, "Thanks baby."

I stayed quiet for a moment relieved to no longer hear fear in his voice, then I shoved him away. "Baby your head. Come here," I gestured for him to come back to me so that I could kick his baby ass. "Let's see who is your baby."

We arrived at the house just before nightfall. I went crazy with the pictures in the house; pulling everything I could in an effort to remember something. At this point I no longer cared if I remembered everything, I just needed proof that I shared my life with Phun, my three years; that I really did live with Phun all those years and that I deserved his love.

"Noh," Phun called me," Please stop."

I've been at it for hours. "Go away if you are not going to help," I said, sounding as annoyed as I felt.

"You are just stressing out over nothing. Just give it a rest."

"Nothing?" I leveled him with a piercing look. "So whether I remember or not doesn't matter to you. "

He said nothing and I returned my eyes to the box of gifts I was going through.

"No, it doesn't," he whispered.

"What?" I lifted my head

"Noh, you will remember some day, or maybe you never will, it doesn't matter."

"Would you say the same thing if I was the one who remembered and you didn't? Even if you don't understand at least see how important this is to me and just quit making me feel like what I want is unimportant."

I dumped the box and turned for the door.

"Noh, come on. Stay let's talk about it."

"I'm done talking."

"Noh."

I gave him the deaf hear but I wasn't really mad at him. I was mad at myself for wasting the whole day trying to remember. For wasting Phun's time and I still couldn't remember a single thing. Is this normal? If Phun remembers because he loves me so much then the reason I can't remember is because I didn't love Phun? Then why would I stay with him for all those years and right now I feel ready to burst with love of Phun.

I needed to remember, something, anything. That reminded me of Phun's panic when we were driving the house. Even remembering the accident would be something at this point. Oh wait, light bulb! This gives me the idea to visit the scene of our accident. It was traumatic, surely I would remember that. What happened that night?

I got there with a taxi, paid and he drove. It was just around the corner of a shopping mall, right at the head entrance of Siam. It wasn't a busy road. I looked left and right, not sure what I should see. It was a little dark save for the busy lights coming from Siam which was trooping out people like chickens.

I walked along the road as if I was going back to the house on foot, then I heard someone shout, followed by a laugh. A group of likely drunk girls were crossing and one of them fell and the others were laughing at her. They were still in the middle of the road. A car honked and its light flashed into my eyes. I shielded from it and squinted but it was like it was still in my eyes and it was blinking. My head gave a violent spin.

I was in the car laughing with Phun, he was teasing me. I felt something in my pocket. Then I began to hyperventilate, the air in my chest was being pulled out and I couldn't pull it back in. I called for Phun; he was the one next to me.

Just as fast, the world righted itself again. There was no flashing light, I wasn't in a car anymore. When I looked up, I saw Phun there like he heard my call and came running. I realized that I was on the ground holding my head, there were people surrounding me.

"Noh, are you alright," Phun pulled me up from the ground while the spectators watched. I was still a little confused.

"Noh," he was saying, "why did you come here, look at you." He took out his handkerchief and wiped my nose. Okay, not a child here. But when said handkerchief came, I saw red.

"Is that blood," I asked wide eyed. Phun raised his hand as if tempted to smack me.

"No it's watercolor, what do you think? Do you know how reckless you were?"

My head was still spinning and felt a little tight. He took me by the arm and raised me to my feet. The people around us started to disperse once they see that I am not dying.

"Why did you have to come here, Noh?"

"How did you know where to find me?"

Phun sighed, "Because you looked like you were on a mission and I know you." He shook his head, "I love you Noh but you can be so pig headed."

I didn't take offense since he was patting my head while looking so fondly at me. I smiled back. "Well my pig head-ness has brought forth fruit." I made sure to sound smug and enjoyed the confusion on his face.

"What do you mean," he asked.

"I remember something important, but we have to go to the hospital to get it."

He watched me then nodded, "well yeah, we need to be sure you didn't destroy anything up there."

I rolled my eyes and wipe off blood from under my nose, "I'm fine. I feel great."

He didn't look very convinced so I leaned over and kissed him. He jerked in surprise and pulled back to look at me, I was smiling named telling him without words that I was okay. He wrapped his arm around me and kissed me back. We kissed slowly and lovingly for a long moment.

Later we arrived at the hospital and unlike Phun's insane paranoia, nothing was wrong with me, but the doctor did tell me not to try to remember anything about my past anymore. I looked at Phun and said, "I already remember all I needed to."

He was watching me with some level of caution but I could see his happiness, recognize it. Just be happy if you want no need to hide it dude, no need to hide it from me. I smiled back and it was great to see it returned.

When we started to leave, he said," so what is that thing we have to get here?"

I nodded, "there it is." It was perfect timing as just as I was talking P'Ae shows up. Phun's expression turned confused and he released me from his hold.

"What?"

I smiled at him. Hehe, keep wondering. This was so much fun. "There is something I want to take from P'Ae," I said and flashed a grin.

"Noh, you are being so..."

I gestured for him to be patient and went to P'Ae. He hadn't seen me yet so gave a really startled yelp when I showed up like a ghost behind him. Wow, P'Ae has a really girly scream. I chuckled in my heart.

"Noh?" he asked and looked me up and down like he thought I was his imagination. "What are you doing here?"

"P'Ae, you remember that thing you asked me about?"

"What," his eyes went past me and he must have seen Phun. "You mean the box?"

I nodded. P'Ae gave me a black box as part of my things when I was being discharged but I rejected the box because I didn't know it was mine.

"Do you still have it?"

"Uh," he looked at the locker in front of me. "Why do you want it now, last time you said it doesn't belong to you."

"Well last time I didn't know anything. I do now."

"You remember?"

"Not all of it, but um," Phun was coming over, unable to wait for me anymore, or maybe just too curious and jealous. "Enough."

P'Ae let out a breath and glanced behind him at Phun. The guy was so serious, what was he thinking. I hid a smile and collected the black box when P'Ae gave it to me.

He left without saying a word and Phun took his place to stare at the box I was holding in my hand with a deep undisguised frown. "What is that?" he asked.

I wanted to tease him and as I rolled the box with my fingers I thought of something clever to say. "It's my anniversary gift to you," I replied honestly. This was too important to joke about and though I did feel nervous, it was nothing compared to the relief I felt.

"When did you buy a gift and what anniversary, we only just started..." he trailed off and looked sharply at me.

I tried to hide my smile but it was no use, I was smiling widely.

"You remember?"

I shook my head.

He frowned, "you don't remember"

I shook my head again. I guess I was going to tease him.

"Then what is it?" the impatient person shook me. Hey, are you trying to drive away the little memory I remembered.

So as not to risk another shaking I said, "I remember the night of the accident,"

His eyes lost some light, I bet he is worrying about how hurt or traumatized I would be with that memory.

"Not that," I said, "Earlier when you were asking me about my gift, the one I bought for you, for our anniversary and I couldn't say."

He nodded. "Well," I exhaled, "it's big and I'm probably moving too fast but I don't care. I don't care if this is the only memory I remember or that I never remember anything. I don't care about anything or what anyone would say about this, all I know is my heart remembers you and I can never forget you and I don't want to waste another moment of my life away from you so,"

Somebody stop me, I am beginning to blabber. I guess I am nervous. I exhaled and Phun was smiling like he already knew what I wanted to say.

"Well, here it is," I held up the box, "after all I put you through you get the chance to open it."

He looked at it smiling like his lips were permanently shaped like that, "that's all I wanted you to know Noh. I said it wrongly back there but no matter how many times my mind, my head forgets you," he held his chest, "my heart will always remember you."

I smiled back, I was permanently going to be smiling for the rest of my life and that is okay. As long as I am with Phun.

"So are you going to open it or what?" I said to hide how embarrassed I was

"I am," he said and opened the box that contained the matching rings. "So you want to spend the rest of your life with me Khun Noh."

"What..." I sounded like I wanted to deny but then I shrugged and he laughed. "What can I do, I'm stuck with you." I sighed at my no-girlfriend future.

"I am happy to spend the rest of my life with you too Noh."

Ugh, he is so cheesy. "Sure," I said, my cheeks feel like swollen bread. "Put it on." I held out my finger for him and he did, the ring fit perfectly into my ring finger, then I put his on for him.

No sooner had we returned home that Nong Pang saw us with the rings, put two and two together and all our friends heard. Yuri finally called me back. She was so busy with her studies that she couldn't get back to me.

I want to tell you that I remembered everything and that life after this was peachy for us but it would be a lie. I didn't remember much of anything for a really long time and the next few years of our life was hectic.

Maybe you will hear from us. Maybe Phun would write a book too. It depends. Till then, know we got our happiness back.

The End

Author's note: thanks for reading to the end of this story. Hope you liked it. if you did, click the small vote button : ) as I said before there is a high chance there would be a series of sequels to follow this. Look out for it.