taehyung's pov

"not gonna lie, this isn't your finest work," my professor told me as he handed me my latest short story. to get this sort of response from someone i look up to, just felt like a stab in the heart.

i really need to separate my self-worth from my work.

"would you mind getting into specifics?"

"as to why this sucks?" twist the knife even more, would you?

"a man who left his family only two months after his first child was born due to his fear of failure as a father, comes back ten years later, trying to redeem himself. wife simply takes him back because as it turns out, they still haven't divorced by that point and she still loves him. did you really expect a different reaction from me? i mean, what was the moral of the story? that no matter how bad it is a thing you've done, there would still be people out there stupid enough to forgive you? i would understand that, but the fact that his wife and his son aren't even the slightest bit infuriated at him is just, quite honestly, impossible. i know i told you to write fiction, but i didn't ask for a fairytale."

as he continued on his rant about how terrible my work was, all i could think about was how much i wanted that sort of fairytale to exist. i wanted to be forgiven.

not only by the person i've done wrong, but also by myself. i wanted to forgive me, but i didn't think i could. every time i closed my eyes, i still saw jimin screaming at me as tears ran down his cheeks. i could still hear the crack in his voice when he told me i should've waited.

i should've waited for him, but i didn't. i jumped to the arms of someone i barely even knew and gave myself away.

if i had waited, jimin would still be here, laughing with me, holding my right hand as i sat on his lap and he reads me a book. if i had waited, i would still have my muse and i would still be able to write like i always do.

if i had waited for jimin, i would've never lost him.

"mr. kim? i...i didn't mean to be so harsh on you. i'm just doing my job as i always have and i'm here to give you my most honest opinions to help you improve." hearing this made me go back to reality.

i was crying.

in front of my professor.

next thing i knew, i was grabbing my papers from him and bolting out the door.