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SBAWP | Chapter 42

Did you like Chapter 46, re-written in Logan's POV? 

If you haven't read it yet, you can find it in "STAWP Bonus Stories."

"Your wolf is telling you to what?" Logan presses.

"Well... to, um, do... stuff?" I blush and try look anywhere but at him. I gaze at the floor, then past his right shoulder, and finally swallow hard and sneak a peek at his confused face.

"What kind of..." Logan starts to ask and I wipe my sweaty palms on my silky dress and pray to the Moon Goddess that I won't have to say it aloud. Then, Logan's face fills with realization and he exclaims, "oh, that kind of stuff!"

"Yeah." I shut my eyes in sheer mortification.

"Saf, it's fine." Logan whispers, squeezing my hand. "My wolf does too."

"He does?" I ask nervously.

"Sure." Logan grins, like it's the best news in the world, and not absolutely mortifying. "And we can do all that after the an—"

"No," I cry, pushing away from him and moving to the middle of the room. "I'm not going to do that."

"Why not?" Logan looks hurt and... shocked? Did he really think I was going to sleep with him? I barely even know him. We're not even officially dating, at least don't think we are... and even if we were, I wouldn't just sleep with him. I'm not ready to repeat the condom lesson with anyone, not even Logan. Making out with him is one thing, but how can he possibly think that...

"Wait," I blurt out, "are we talking about the same kind of stuff?" What if Logan's wolf does just want to make out, while mine keeps pushing me to do other stuff. What will Logan think when he finds out? He'll think my wolf is a total perv.

My mortification skyrockets, and I suddenly wish I could disappear. I glance at the door, then sneak a peek toward the bathroom. What if I were to lock myself in there with the demon shower and never come out? At least then I would stop embarrassing myself.

"I think so?" Logan runs nervous hand through his hair while his cheeks turn an adorable red. "I mean, stuff is stuff."

"Yeah, but stuff? Or stuff stuff?" I press and then wish the Moon Goddess would just do me a favor and kill me on the spot. I mean, why couldn't I just pretend my wolf wanted to make out too, instead of embarrassing myself like this. Why, Saffron? Why?

"Stuff stuff?" Logan repeats, still blushing. Then he shocks me by glancing at the bed suggestively. "You know..."

"I'm not going to do that," I exclaim. "We just met. I don't really know you."

The moment I say it, I realize that's not really true. Even though I've only known Logan for a short time, I know a lot about him. I know that he has the same favorite classes I do, that he loves eating pizza, and that he worked at Joe's over the summer. I know that he's funny, and fun, and kind, and caring, and sweet. I know that he's cute and that his wolf is a beautiful gray, a shade so light that it's almost white. I also know that he isn't very fast, but he's not mad about it the way Dad is.

I also know that Logan stayed by my side and took care of me the whole time I was healing from the attack. I know that he's a good friend to Jasper, and that almost everyone in the pack—including Zara—likes and respects him. I know that he would never hurt me, or anyone, not if he could help it. Finally, I know that me saying I don't really know him hurt his feelings, even though he quickly tries to mask it.

"You can get to know me, Saf," he whispers, stepping toward me. "I'll tell you anything you want to know."

My body responds to the husky timbre of his voice and to the vulnerability I briefly see reflected in his eyes. My heart speeds up until it's beating wildly in my chest and I suddenly feel warm all over. Uncomfortably warm, so much so that I take a nervous step back. "I'm still not going to, you know..." I swallow and back away further. "We haven't even gone on a date."

"Well have time for all that, Saf." Logan slowly closes the distance between us. "After Father's announcement, we'll have all the time in the world."

"O-okay," I whisper as he brushes back a strand of my still wet hair.

"We still have to try all the pizzas at Joe's, remember?" He smiles as his gaze locks on my lips. "We'll learn everything there is to know about each other then. I promise."

"Okay." I swallow nervously.

"Yeah?" Logan's lips curve up and he leans towards me. I feel my heart rate spike and lick my lips nervously in anticipation of the kiss. My eyelids start to drift shut, but then Logan whispers, "No. We can't."

"W-we can't?" I repeat, my gaze still locked on his lips. He's too close, so close that I can feel his breath softly grazing my lips. All I'd have to do is lean forward, and our lips would touch. I suddenly want that, more than anything, and start to reach for him.

"Saf, the announcement," Logan suddenly exclaims, backing away from me. "We have to figure out how to link, before it's too late."

"I-I can't." I stare down at my feet.

"Please, Saf, you have to. If Father found out, it would ruin everything."

"I-I'm sorry Logan." I shake my head. "I can't lose control. What if my forced me to... to..." A bunch of horrible thoughts cycle through my head: tearing my clothes off in front of the entire pack; jumping a guy other than Logan, a guy I don't even like; attacking someone; hurting one of the little kids. My eyes fill with mortified tears.

"Saf, hey, hey, it's okay." Logan gently caresses my cheek. "Your wolf can't force you to do anything."

"Yes, she can," I whisper, leaning into his touch.

"Your wolf is not the enemy, Saf. She's a part of who you are."

"I know, but... remember what you said in the bathroom?" I blush at the memory of the stuff we did there, and if the heated look Logan gives me is anything to go by, I can tell he's thinking about it, too.

"What did I say?" he asks, his voice deep and husky.

"T-that you couldn't control your wolf."

"I never said that." The heated look disappears, replaced by confusion.

"Yeah, you did. Remember? You said that your wolf wanted to hurt me, that it was just instinct and—"

"Wait a minute." Logan lets go of my cheek and takes a step back, his eyes wide. "I never wanted to hurt you."

"What about on our run? And in the janitor's closet." My cheeks flood with even more color. "You lost control and—"

"I didn't lose control." Logan shakes his head. "Saf, I... I'm so sorry..." He runs a hand through his hair. "I was just... look, there's something I need to tell you." He grabs my hand and pulls me toward the bed. By the time I think to resist, he has me sitting down facing him.

"Logan, I don't think..." I start to get up, but he pulls me back down again.

"Saf, I never wanted to hurt you," he says, looking at me earnestly. "Never."

1. Rate this  chapter on a scale from ♥ (1) to ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ (10)

2. What do you want to see happening in the next chapter? 

3. Are you ready to find out where POW's been over the last few days? 

4. Yanny or Laurel?

5. Blue and black or white and gold (sorry, I couldn't resist)?

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