It wasn't a long time until the mysterious third year had managed to defeat all of Class 1A, to all the first years' complete and utter surprise. We groaned while on the ground, clutching our stomachs that had been aching for a while now. Uraraka had almost vomited, but held it in and just cowered in misery. Even the strong Kirishima was trembling, the little shakes of his back enough to tell a bystander how hard Mirio hit.

"Geez, he's really gotten stronger, hasn't he?" Nejire gasped, eyes glinting in wonder and curiosity. "Togata really is powerful, right Tamaki?" I only heard the raventte mumble in a quiet voice, as his back was facing towards us.

"He's always been strong since we were kids. It's always been that way. It's just that..." He paused, but didn't shift in his position. "He just needs to learn to hold back." My ears could only strain their conversation for that amount of time before I nearly fainted out of exhaustion, fingers clenching the folds of my uniform, my waist and ribs feeling like they were lit with an open match, then doused in a healthy amount of lava. They stung like crazy, even compared to the core workouts I did everyday. 

Breathing hard, I'd somehow managed to regain my composure without wobbling too much. As I planted a hand onto the ground, using it to hoist my body up, I noticed that others did the same. Looking around the arena, I saw Todoroki's face with an unusual expression plastered onto it: shock. The almighty Todoroki Shoto, one of the most powerful people in the class, who has trained with professional heroes since he was little, was shocked by a third-year's ability. 

It was fair enough, as we'd all been beaten in a mere moment. Slowly, the whole class got up from their wallowing and stood in a group, heads bowed. The blonde in front of us laughed, a perky smile slapped onto his features.

"I tried to make it so you wouldn't be able to see my willy," he apologized, nervously scratching his head. "Sorry about that, girls." I heard Ochako sneeze in the back, then groan because of her aching stomach. 

"But anyways," he continued, hands now held behind his back, "you all kind of get it now, right?" If I had the ability to scoff at the moment, I would have. But alas, the hurting inside the pits of my insides bore too much pain onto my body.

"We all just got punched in the stomach without really knowing what was going on," I whimpered, the tips of my fingers beginning to feel a bit cold. "God, this is horrible." Mirio laughed a little, putting his hands on his hips and cocking his head to ask another question:

"Do you think my quirk was strong?" Almost immediately, Sero had found the strength to angrily blurt out an answer off of impulse.

"It was too strong!" he protested, waving his hand in the air. Hagakure joined in on the rising anger towards Togata: "That's not fair, think about me too!" 

"What are you, a hybrid like Todoroki? You can warp and slip through things!" Mina exclaimed, hands clenched in fists of rage. Mirio made an effort to laugh again, cutely answering the aggressive question. 

"Actually, no! I have only one quirk." I cocked an eyebrow, the pain in my core subsiding bit by bit. Only one quirk? It must be powerful, who knows what he might be capable of. He might even be the next All Might, for all I know. I hummed to myself, pondering about the topic as Midoriya pushed further into the topic.

"Only one?" Nejire suddenly popped out of nowhere, raising her arm and grinning. Her blue hair bounced with her quick and energetic movements.

"I know! I know his quirk! Can I say it, can I say it?" Togata looked in her direction until she couldn't contain it anymore.

"It's Permeation!"

"Hado-san, it's Mirio's turn right now," Tamaki grumbled, his backside still facing us, to our dismay. Togata broke the tension brewing in the room before it could get worse, quickly breaking up the slight banter between his two classmates.

"That's right!" he affirmed, nodding. "My quirk is Permeation. What you guys called a warp, was a product of that!" Hado puffed her cheeks out and pulled on his Gym uniform, like an angry Pomeranian. I could tell she wanted to explain everything. 

"Ah sorry about that, Hado-kun." Deku jumped at the opportunity to speak, an immediate avalanche of questions spilling out of his mouth as he used his hands to take invisible notes, soaking in every bit of information that he heard.

"How exactly do you warp?" His eyes were blown wide, irises becoming small dots compared to his dinner-plate sized whites. Togata smiled in amusement, finding the small first-year to be quite the spectacle as an interviewer.

"If I activate my quirk through my whole body, then I can pass through anything. Anything. That means the ground, too."

"Oh!" Uraraka brightened up, her mouth shaped into a small hole. "Then does that mean that time... you fell underground?" Mirio looked at her in praise, nodding his head, glad for the sufficiency.

"Yeah, that's right! I fell into the ground! And, when I release my quirk, something strange happens." He explained to us a small excerpt of Physics, where apparently two masses can't overlap, so when he deactivates his quirk, he gets shot up into the air, or repelled to the surface in an instant. Everyone was stood in amazement, trying to think of the logistics. Mina piped up for the second time, eyebrows furrowed and face like a gumball.

"Sound like a buggy game," she pouted, hands on her hips. Togata immediately started to laugh, genuinely entertained by her response. 

"You could say that!" 

"Wow, so you can move wherever you want and whenever you want? Lucky, what a strong quirk," I mumbled under my breath. He must have heard me, since the next thing that I listened to was a direct response to the question.

"No, I made it into a strong quirk." His usual clear and radiant blue eyes were now shrouded with a cloud of brooding, or so it seemed. They didn't appear as vibrant anymore, and held some sort of mischief within them.

"While my quirk is activated," Togata explained, trying to draw this out as best as he could, "my lungs can't take in oxygen. Even if I breathe in, it'll just go through, right? In the same way, vibrations go through my eardrums, and light goes through my retinas.

"I can go through everything, but that means I can't feel anything. I fall even when I have mass. That's all it is. Even if I want to go through a wall, I activate everything but one leg. Then I release in the other leg then land on it, activate my other leg and then go through. Even for a simple action, a lot of steps are involved, right?" The class muttered amongst themselves, nervous at even the thought of the nerve-wracking process.

"If it were me, I'd mess it up in an instant."

"I wouldn't even be able to move if I couldn't feel anything." 

"Ah, that's right. As expected, I was always behind. In no time, I dropped to dead last. My clothes, too." He smiled at his own joke, but continued. "But in order to get to the top with this quirk, I couldn't just stay behind.

"Predictions! I had to think faster than those around me! Sometimes, I had to be tricky! Above all, I had to predict what was going to happen! And what made those predictions possible was experience! My time ended being kind of long, but that was why I wanted to fight you all! I wanted to show you through experience rather than words!" He rapidly pointed his finger to his head, so much so that I was afraid that it would leave a dent. 

"In our work studies, we're not treated as just students -- rather, one of the sidekicks and pros! It's really scary. The pros will end up sometimes watching people die. But those pains and traumas are all experiences you go through that you wouldn't be able to at school!

"I changed the experience I got during my work into power, and took the top spot! That's why I think it's something that you should do even though you're scared, first years!" Unconsciously, I began to clap, my vision blurred through scattered thoughts racing around my head. I held a blank stare at Mirio, my gaze unrelenting. 

We should still do something we're scared of, huh? 

The mood lightened after his speech, everyone realizing how important that talk was. Their bodies began to move, bustling around with excitement and anticipation, now really feeling confident.

"Wow, he really did something for us that he could have explained in mere minutes," Momo commented, her smile appreciative. "That's really courteous of him." The class nodded, even chattering when we went back to class. Meanwhile, I was still in deep thought, my hands now resting by my sides as I walked with the small mob.

My jaw clenched and I pushed a huffy breath of air out of my mouth. I wanted to chase after the third-year, but knew that he had better things to do. It was selfish of me, but I just wanted to talk. He developed something so common into something that held meaning, but with what? With his experiences, with his spirit, but what else? How could I have become that?

Groaning to myself, the only feeling that I could fathom was immense regret. Regret that I had not pushed myself hard enough, that I didn't have the spirit, and that I didn't go harder than my own limit. If there was something wrong with me, I wished that an anonymous entity would just tell me so I could fix it.

What was I doing so wrong by myself?

__

After school had ended, I sat down on my chair, leaning on my desk. Getting out a pen and a clean piece of paper, I began to write. About all my troubles, the things that I weren't getting, the concepts that I couldn't bear in mind without wanting to scream and throw something. I sighed, the black ink from my pen flowing smoothly onto the crisp sheet, my hand furiously working to scribble the letter, letting out all my frustration onto one toxic little slip. These were the things I wanted to improve on, that I wanted to focus on during my time here at the UA. I wanted to overcome these things through my own effort, so that I could look back and be proud of myself.

Especially since the internships were coming up, I needed to improve fast, and decide on who I wanted to go to.

Things To Work On:

1. Strength! Improve on yourself.

2. Spirit! Try not to let yourself get too down, or else you won't have much to fight for.

3. Education! Let yourself research topics, like Momo, so you go into a fight with a proper head set on your shoulders.

4. Trust! Trust yourself, and let your mind guide you. Sometimes, though, you need to go off of instinct. You got this!

5. (Most Important!!) Love! Love yourself as a person and don't forget to never look down :)

6. Work Ethic! Your own work ethic needs to be better. You have to have good ethic if you want to improve by yourself.

Finally finished, I looked at the product of my work and furrowed my eyebrows. I was set on doing these things, and accomplishing them no matter what. Pulling out the lowest drawer of my dresser, I slipped the paper in there for safekeeping, so that I never forgot about it. Alright.

I wondered what I should do for the rest of the evening. Sit here, or go join friends outside. Hearing ruckus from the other rooms, I decided that it was best that I stay alone today. Pressing my lips together, I turned on my speaker and connected it to my phone. Soft music filled the room as I laid down on my bed, letting my eyes close. 

My muscles relaxed as I just heard the gentle beat flow through my ears, coaxing my brain to rest. Eventually, I fell into deep slumber, but awoke again, this time, in an unfamiliar room. 

Oh, this must be a dream. 

I tried touching my arm, but felt nothing. Nodding my head, I glanced around the space cautiously, racking my memory of things that might have been present in my head that matched the surrounding area. I was currently in an alleyway, with thing strips of light flashing on either side of me. Deciding to go towards the light, I dragged my body, which seemed heavier than I remembered, to the openings. Somehow, I managed to pull myself out with quite a bit of effort, an unnatural tallness to my build.

"Look, look! It's VerA!" I raised my eyebrows as my eyes fixed to the crowd gathering in front of me. Cheering fans were throwing gifts of all sorts, especially flowers. I picked up a bushel and recognized the breed: Begonias. They were all lovely, the plumes of petals had a sweet scent that I couldn't get enough of. Like rich honey, but more floral. They came in all colors, ranging from the deepest reds to the lightest of yellows and whites. 

The crowd cheered once more as I smiled, joy and pride filling my heart, but for no reason. I didn't know what was going on. 

Why are they all cheering for me? Did I do something good?

"Version A!" A reporter called out to me, shoving a microphone in my face. I let out a disgruntled murmur, but regained my posture and flashed a brilliant grin, the creases in my eyes feeling a little bit too deep, almost.

"Yes?" They looked delighted that I'd even responded to them. Beaming back, they moved forwards, pushing past all the others with twists and turns, giving the rest of the crowd a stink-eye. 

"How does it feel to be a self-earned hero? It must feel nice, considering you did all of this yourself!" I did? About to answer, my mouth hung open until the scene changed. Now I was in some sort of apartment. The setting changed so fast I took a second to get used to it.

The streets filled with people now shifted to an empty hallway. The sound of the clicking of cameras and cheers, squeals, even whoops faded into silence. It was peaceful, but eerily unsettling. I cautiously paced down the apartment, noticing how normal it seemed. I guess it was mine, but again, I wasn't so sure.

It sure doesn't seem like a pro hero lives here.

I twisted my body to see the first door on my left. It seemed to be some kind of workroom, with small decorations all around. An office with a computer sat atop a desk, and a normal chair in front. A small couch was set in the corner, some blankets folded on top neatly. It wasn't bad. Nodding my head, I advanced to the next room. 

A small kitchen set up greeted me. It was messier than the last room, but still manageable. The remnants of the last meal I'd presumably eaten passed my vision as I walked in. The sink held small bowls and one pair of chopsticks, all set down and forgotten about. The corners of my lips couldn't help but dive down a little, the high I'd gotten from the public wearing off.

This is... kind of sad.

Trying not to get too paranoid, I shook my head and shrugged off the fact that this seemed too real. Advancing to the next room, it was merely a bathroom with a cup atop one of the shelves that held a singular toothbrush and tube of toothpaste. My frown becoming more prominent, my stomach felt queasy. 

There was one last and final room to be explored, and the door was shut. Gulping down my saliva, I cautiously turned the handle to reveal what was inside. The dark room provided no sources of light whatsoever, so I had to grab around to see where the light switch was.

When I found it, a small lamp flickered on, revealing the inside of the hidden room. Immediately, both my hands flew to my mouth as I stared at the walls and interior in pure shock and horror. Wall to wall, it was covered with papers, and attached to those were small tacks holding red strings in place. I saw the familiar faces of my 1A classmates plastered onto the walls, but they were more grown now. A big map was centered in the room and I couldn't help but be drawn to it. On it, there were tiny scripts of words and details that resembled my handwriting. 

But everything seemed to be so... sporadic.

Every detail was jarring, it stood out to me -- it jumped out. I looked at the wall behind me, closest to a small bed that held hundred of cut-out articles. Each and every one of them either had my face, my picture, or both. And in every picture I was smiling, holding a rescued child, protecting the public. On the wall next to it, there were articles about my friends, my classmates. They were smiling, protecting everybody. In one picture I noticed that Momo and Kaminari had become part of the same agency.

Post-its were hanging from the articles, and I unstuck one of them. It read, "What's the difference? Can you see?" I squinted, trying to look at the photos. One of me, and one of Yaoyorozu and Denki. I unstuck another sticky slip, now holding a picture of Todoroki and Deku in my hands. Then another, Tsuyu and Ojiro. And another, with some of the old Class 1A students reuniting with Aizawa, who had grey streaks in his hair. 

And on the fourth and final wall, there were two single sheets of paper. I gently set the scraps I was holding on my desk, then went to look at them. Taking one off, I recognized it as a handwritten letter, but I couldn't identify the writing style. It was bold, as if someone had pressed down really hard while writing it.

(Y/N) (L/N). 

I wish you the best in your own journey.

It seems like you're fine by yourself.

Thank you for being the light of our lives for the time you spent with us.

You were everything to us, and you will still be, even though we aren't a part of your life now.

Just know that we still love you.

In Adoration,

Mom and Dad

I felt tears brewing in my eyes, the paper gently crinkling as my grip tightened. My bottom lip started to quiver as muffled hiccups started to arise, but I took a deep breath in and sucked it up, continuing to the next piece of paper, gingerly setting the note down.

The next sheet unstuck from the wall with a clean finish. It appears that it hasn't been there for a long time. I felt my heart beating against my ribs, almost jumping out of my chest. Trying to calm down, I raised my head high, puffing out my chest as the vents turned on, resonating with a soft hum, filling the room with cold air. The wind swished against my face, ruffling my hair a bit as I felt my breaths evening out.

The note was folded, and as I undid it, my fingers shook. Warily, I peeked inside only to find six words scribbled in my own handwriting, eyes grabbing at them, sending signals to my brain, deciphering the chicken scratch. One of the words was crossed out, but the first letter remained legible.

You're nothing but a l ███ loser.

Before I could really comprehend what it meant, a bursting sensation erupted in my gut as I doubled down, gasping for air, clenching my jaw as hard as I could, tears leaking from my eyes. Coughing, I felt a strangling sensation as though someone was pinning me to the ground by my neck. I craned my eyes to look behind me, and my eyes widened, pupils dilating in fear. 

A blue-haired villain had snuck into my room. One that I knew very well.

"Shigar- Shigaraki, you b-bitch," I wheezed, doing my best to try and pry his slender yet forceful fingers off from my neck. "Let m-me go, dammit!" I could almost feel him smile as sobs choked me even more, my brain scattered, not knowing what to do.

"Poor (Y/N)," his voice cooed, "Lost their friends, lost their loved ones, lost everything. For what? A shitty hero job?" His laughter echoed throughout the room as the walls fell down to reveal a pitch black void, only the two of us. Or so it seemed. With the room, there still was the choking sensation, but no Shigaraki. I couldn't feel anything, but suddenly the perspective changed.

There I was, suspended in the air, legs flailing. But my arms were positioned weirdly. Around my neck as saliva dripped from the corners of my mouth and as my face turned blue, tears running down the sides of my cold cheeks.

I could still hear and feel the ventilation systems as the sound grew louder and louder, the humming becoming a thrumming sound that shook me to the bone. It become colder, and colder, until the fingers that were wrapped around my throat became black, but still held on full force. I let out a sob, but my hands only held tighter and tighter until I was positive that the nails would dig into my fine flesh and expose all the chords and tendons that held my head onto my shoulders.

When I felt like I was about to faint, I heard his voice again.

"You only choke yourself, hero. With your own pestilence. That will always be the case." 

Gasping, I woke up in cold sweat, the remains of the nightmare I had clearly stained on my face. Above me, the air vents were quietly humming, brushing cold air into my room, tickling my face and freezing my exposed skin. As I went to turn it off, the sinking feeling in my chest didn't mix well with the punch I'd taken from Mirio. My fingers shook as I flipped the switch, the humming coming to a stop.

I sat on top of my bed, wiping sweat off of my face and drying my tears with a tissue. My hands curled around my blanket as I let tears fall freely. 

How am I able to continue, even though I still don't know what the fuck is wrong with me.