How do I know if I am happy
It is hard to find the words
A twitch of a lip
Or the teetering of a laugh
Both easily forced
But to actually experience joy
Real joy
That is not something
As easily faked
For if it was
I would surly have
Duped myself already
To feel such a defining emotion
Not even full blown elation
I would settle for even a
Spreading of warmth
In the pit of my belly
Seemingly normal emotions
But, often, just outside of the reach
Of my own experience