"We should check out the generator later, see if it's still working," Daryl broke the silence, voicing the subject of his cogitating on their way back to the cellblock C, where Lumen should be waiting and where they were going to leave Beth's body as they promised Maggie. He was in a good mood, even though it wasn't him who got to kill Tomas, he was still content.

He never even thought about the possibility of having his brother with him on something like this. He didn't even consider it. Not only because he didn't think Merle would go for it. He didn't believe he'd like it to have Merle there. But today proved him otherwise. He discovered a new thing about himself, that he quite enjoyed to watch. Watching Merle work on Tomas was almost as much satisfying as squeezing the life out of someone by himself, almost.

Merle was the one carrying the blanket in which Beth was wrapped up. He turned to his brother, somehow taken aback by the topic inside of Daryl's head, but he shook it off quickly. He braced himself, trying very hard not to think about who he was carrying. It was not like him to act like a pussy. This whole thing was fucking him up and he needed to get his head straight. Daryl actually had a point. The generator could be a good thing. If not for lights then for a freezer and hot water.

"Yeah, good thinking, we'll see if it's working," Merle agreed in the end, "later though, tomorrow maybe, I have plans for tonight."

"Plans?" Daryl asked frowning, "What kind of plans could you possibly have here?"

"I plan on going through the offices on booze hunt as soon as we drop her off," he nodded to the body in his arms. Daryl's frown disappeared and instead, an understanding smirk broke on his face.

They walked the rest of the hallway getting to the corner leading to the cellblock they were aiming for when an after thought came to Merle, "If we'll get the generator going we'd need to find some fuel for it too."

"Yeah, one thing at the time, we'll see about getting it going first." Daryl nodded and quicken his pace after he rounded the corner. He couldn't wait to get to Lumen. His blood ran high on the previous events and he was looking forward to letting out some steam himself. Preferably inside of her.

The cell block was quiet, almost disturbingly quiet. They found everybody from the search party in the common room waiting on them. Nobody was talking though.

Maggie was sitting at one of the tables staring at nothing, silent tears trickled down her cheeks. Glenn was sitting by her side but he wasn't touching her, he still looked rather ill. T-Dog was sitting on the stairs to the door leading out of the cellblock. Rick was standing near the bars dividing the area from the cells, looking more than troubled. The pregnant lady was nowhere to be found, neither was Lumen nor the kid. Daryl expected them to be inside, either tending to the old man or helping the other girl who's name he forgot yet again.

Merle laid Beth's body down on the table Maggie was sitting at, "here," was the only thing leaving his mouth.

Maggie broke off her trance at his approach. She glanced at the blanket and then at him, "He's dead?"

"Yeah," Merle confirmed, not really wanting to go into more detail. He wasn't sure if she even wanted to know. Whatever the case he decided to end the conversation and searched with his eyes for Daryl, who was on his way to the cellblock, to get Lumen most likely.

"She's not there," T-Dog spoke up, Daryl's head snapped to his direction.

"What do you mean she's not there? I told her to wait for us here."

T-Dog shrugged, "They were already gone when we got here. Lori told us Amy didn't want to stay here and since- you know, we don't have to watch our back for those assholes anymore. So they left, to your room, I think."

Daryl looked around only now realizing that Axel wasn't present either. He let out a huff and shaking his head he turned around to go back to their room. Merle moved to follow when-

"Hey, can I have a word with you two. It'll be just a minute," Rick called for them. Merle glared at him, not at all in the mood for any discussion about boundaries or any other stupid shit Rick had to say.

Daryl didn't even bother to look back, with a snort he left.

Seeing that, Rick raised his hands in placating gesture, "I don't want to argue or anything, I just wanted to thank you. You know, for actually helping us look for the girls." Merle nodded to show he heard him and was about to leave again, but Rick wasn't finished, "Wait! I just wanted to say that I see now you were just trying to help, and I think it's about time to talk about the deal we had again. We can work together."

Merle looked him up and down, licking his dry lips which only reminded him how thirsty he was. His mission to find more booze freshly on his mind, "Shit, you still don't get it, do you? I don't give a shit about you, the damn deal, or your people," Merle bit out, pointedly shifting his eyes to the miserable looking people in the room, dead body included. "I do whatever I have to to take care of me and mine, and from the looks of it I'm doing much better job than your sorry ass."

It was a low blow, and he didn't really mean what he said, but when had that ever stopped him from saying something. He'd say anything to shut Rick up and be done with him at this point.

Rick hung his head, hands on his hips, thinking, but before he came up with a response Merle left, heading for the offices. He would give his left arm for a bottle of anything with alcohol in it right about now.

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Daryl tried to open the door to their room only to find it locked. His first instinct was to kick it open, but he held himself back. It was actually good they did that. Maybe Oscar had to leave for whatever reason. Maybe Lumen was treating Amy. So he took a deep breath, slowly let it out and knocked. The door was opened only seconds later by Oscar. He was holding his forefinger to his lips nodding behind him, then opened the door wider revealing the girl sleeping on one of the couches.

Daryl searched the room with his eyes, but before he could voice his question Oscar whispered, "Lumen is in your room." Then he closed the door quietly, locking it again, letting his hand linger on the lock he asked, "Where's your brother?"

"He went to see if he finds anything useful in them offices," Daryl answered already moving to the other door.

"When you say useful, you talking about liquor, right?" Oscar asked with his eyebrows raised, Daryl only shrugged but it was answer enough.

"Thank God!" Oscar breathed out, sounding rather relieved, it was Daryl's turn to raise his eyebrow in question. Oscar went to his own couch, "What? I hope he'll find some, after what I saw today, after what I heard here, I could use a shot... or ten." He sat with a thud, looking tired.

Daryl didn't comment, he didn't feel it. He didn't feel the sorrow the way the others did. He was still rather content, slightly irritated too, but he couldn't put his finger on why. Could be he was irritated by Lumen not waiting for him where he asked her to, but he decided already on his way here that there was really no point in her waiting in the other cellblock when Tomas and Andrew were gone now. So the irritation obviously wasn't completely from that. Maybe the fact he didn't get to kill Tomas was bugging him more than he let himself believe.

Brushing this thought from his mind, he went into their room, closing the door behind him, fully intending to get rid of some of that irritation by fucking.

What he didn't count on was the effect this all had on Lumen. It started to dawn on him pretty quickly though when he found her with the same fucking distant look everybody else wore, staring absently out of the window. She hadn't even noticed he entered the room.

Daryl stared at her back, not sure what to do. Eventually, he decided to just sit on the couch and wait, to give her room to process whatever she needed to process.

"Amy told us what they did to her," Lumen broke the silence after few minutes, letting Daryl know that she was aware of his presence after all, "I mean, not details really at first, only so I would know what injuries she had," she paused to lick her lips, before continuing quietly, "but it was like once she started to talk she couldn't stop. She talked and talked and the image she drew- I just can't get out of my head. She- she told us how they raped her while making her watch Beth's dead body whispering 'that's gonna be you, that's gonna be you soon, but not yet' over and over. I mean, how can people do something like that to other people?"

Daryl looked at her in disbelief, but then realized she couldn't see him so he stood up, and went around her to lean against the window frame. She didn't budge, her gaze fixed on the window. He reached out to tilt her head up so he could look into her eyes.

"Are you seriously asking me that question?"

Her eyes came to focus and she took in his appearance. He had blood on his hands, literally, it was on his shirt too, and at that moment a memory buried a long time ago emerged. Him gutting Paul. The precise way he prepared everything for the kill, which spoke volume about how many times he probably did the very same things before. Memories of her being gutted pretty much the same way. She felt sick again.

Daryl could see the change of the color on her face, or rather the sudden lack of it and he handed her a bottle of water they had stocked in the room. He squatted in front of her and waited for her to pull herself together.

"What I meant is, you know first hand how fucked up people are, you have your scars to prove it. I know it, and I have mine to prove it too. The only difference between us is, I discovered the ugly truth about people when I was still a kid, and therefore accepted it very long time ago. I know helping people somehow makes you feel better. But I don't work that way. I was still practically a kid when I realized what makes me feel better. Before I met you it was actually the only thing making me feel anything at all besides the ever-present anger. So how about we make a deal, to keep us both satisfied. You just do your thing and I'll do mine," he smirked seeing the smallest smile tugging on her face. Yes, she remembered their first deal ever too, "Darling, let me worry about all the assholes left, yeah?"

Lumen's eyes danced between his, she found herself to actually be grateful hearing this. She felt awful for it, but she felt it anyway.

He was right all along. She wasn't a fighter, she liked helping people, she liked making them better. Yes, she could kill one of those dead things anytime, but people? She had trouble with that. And here he was, offering to look after her, to do the dirty work because to him it's no trouble at all, quite the opposite actually.

She knew it probably wasn't right, but after seeing Amy today, she was done with what's right and what's wrong. This new world didn't care about right and wrong. The only thing that mattered now was keeping as many people as she could safe.

Thinking about it, she counted herself lucky to have Daryl in her corner. It was as if he was born for this world where she obviously was not. So she leaned forward and sealed the deal with a kiss, suddenly feeling as if she just made a deal with the devil.

He broke off after a moment, "Come lie down with me."

"I'm not really in the mood for fucking Daryl," she said slightly annoyed with his one-way train of thought.

"Good thing I didn't say anything about fucking then, right?" He didn't wait for an answer and was already tugging her up from her chair, dragging her to the couch.

Lumen lied down with Daryl following right behind her, pressing his body against her back. She was practically trapped between him and the backrest. The stress was starting to get the better of her. Her body was tense and she knew there was no way she'll fall asleep now.

She did her best to not think about Amy in the other room, beaten and broken but she couldn't. She was about to give up on sleeping and move back to her spot by the window when Daryl's hand moved from where it was gripping her arm and started to caress her skin. It roamed up her arm to her shoulder, then down over her side to her hip, then back up and around her to her belly. He kept doing this until he felt her relax under this ministration, and when he heard a quiet content sigh he slid between her legs.

His own breathing got louder, his touch more urgent than comforting, which yanked her out of her relaxation. Not really because of where his hand went, but because she only now remembered in what state said hand was. She didn't want that blood anywhere near her pussy.

"Daryl-" she tried to protest, her fingers circling around his forearm as she tried to tug it away without success.

"You smell so good," Daryl's voice sounded hoarse as he whispered into her ear, "you feel so good," his hand not budging from where it was buried between her thighs, working on her through her pants making her for a second forget why she was protesting in the first place. He moved closer to her and she felt the reason for the change of his mood pressing into her ass.

"Don't you worry. I'll do all the work, you just lay there and relax. I'll go nice and slow, just like you like it," he continued while nuzzling the back of her neck, tugging her pants and panties down at the same time.

The air hit her hot skin and she remembered her issue, "the blood!" She blurted out, "don't put your fingers in me with the blood all over them."

Daryl paused for a second, his horny mind trying to work out what she was talking about until he realized he didn't have a shower. He didn't even wash his hands. He didn't give a damn too, but he did want to keep her happy.

"You got it," he rasped while freeing one of her legs from her pants, then did a quick work of freeing himself from his own pants. He pushed himself up a bit and was now looming over her body. She was still lying on her side, and he lifted her leg and moved it over his hip for better access.

Moving closer he let his dick slide over her wetness, "You help me in then," he instructed while pushing against her.

Lumen was watching him the whole time. It wasn't very dark yet, but it was gloomy. In the contrast with the window behind him, he looked more like a shadow but it gave enough of a light for the blood to be visible, his right hand was now holding her thigh in place around him. His hips were moving against her slowly and his eyes were boring into hers, waiting for her to move.

The only word her mind offered her for this was obscure, but to her surprise, she was turned on by it. And so without breaking the eye contact, she guided him in and as promised he moved slowly, making little circles with his hips that made her cover her mouth with her hands to keep from moaning loudly.

She thought there was no way she would be up for fucking that night, but she was obviously wrong. And then it hit her, this actually didn't feel like fucking. This felt like making love.

Neither of them uttered another word during the whole time they enjoyed each other. The loudest sound was the grunt Daryl made when he came after her body squeezed it out of him when her own orgasm hit her.

They didn't talk afterward either. They just waited in silence for the sleep to come. Daryl was out first and a couple of hours later Lumen heard Merle returning, and not long after she eventually fell asleep too.

Merle, like Daryl before, found the door locked. Oscar quickly let him in after several rather loud knocks, "Oh wow, we're like the royalty here! Having a doorman and all, are you gonna polish my boots too?" Merle snickered.

"Fuck you!" Oscar whisper shouted before motioning to Amy's sleeping form, "keep it down you moron, she's sleeping."

Merle's eyes landed on the girl, the sight of her bruised face somewhat sobering him up a bit, but he didn't linger on her for long. He sat on his own couch and fished several bottles of various alcohol from the sack Oscar only now noticed, the last being rum. Merle shook it in front of Oscar's face to get his attention off of his founding.

"Ha! I knew this will shut you up. Get yourself a cup or something, I ain't giving this bottle out of my hand tonight," Merle said with a slight stutter, obviously having some of the content of his bag in him already.

Oscar didn't care, he needed a drink.

Amy didn't want him to leave when Lumen had been doing the check up. She was clinging to him as if he was a life jacket and unwillingly he had to listen to everything they discussed. He was grateful when she was given something to help her sleep. And when Daryl mentioned what was Merle up to he hoped for anything, and so now he took the cup, downed half of it in one go, which sadly didn't make him feel better at all. He was all for doing his best to drink himself to sleep tonight. And so when he finished his mug he leaned over for a refill.

Merle gave it without a blink. He watched the brown liquid make its way, not taking his eyes off it he cleared his throat uncomfortably, before asking, "So, what did Lumen say? Any permanent damage?" There was no need to specify who and what he was talking about.

Oscar took his now full cup with a nod, "Everything should heal," he answered after a moment, "From what I understood they beat her, raped her in ways guaranteeing we don't have to worry about the possibility of little Tomas or Andrew running around," he took a sip, then checked with his eyes if hers are still closed, "I still feel like an asshole, thinking of that as the good news," he added quietly avoiding eye contact.

If he tried to look at Merle though he would find him not looking at him either. That was the last thing said between them that night too as they continue to work their way through first, second, and half of the third bottle. Only then they were both ready attempt sleeping.

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In the morning, Merle woke up to another hangover. He didn't touch the pills though, he still hadn't decided if he wanted to give them up yet, but he just wasn't in the mood. Or at least that's what he told himself.

He looked around only to find the room quiet. Amy was still sleeping only now she had her back turned to him. Oscar was nowhere to be found, probably gone to take a piss. Merle went to the cabinet for a bottle of water which didn't help any. He sat back down on the couch and reached for the still half full bottle of bad whiskey they didn't finish yesterday, deciding the best cure for a hangover was a little shot.

He was about to put the bottle back down on the table when he saw movement in his peripheral vision. Amy was waking up. He froze, not sure what to do.

She looked quite hysterical when she saw him yesterday. Should he let his presence known, or should he stay quiet? He had no idea, this situation was completely alien to him. She looked a bit disoriented, as she looked around herself. Probably result of that little help for her sleep, he knew all about the effect of that pills, his mind made up he cleared his throat loudly to let her know she's not alone.

Amy turned around, her hand going to her forehead immediately, as her head started to throb more after the sudden move. She rubbed it a couple of times before she looked at him. He swore he could tell the second all the events of the previous day hit her. Her eyes went wide and started to move frantically around the room, either looking for threats or looking for Oscar. After a minute they landed on him again.

She tried to stand but she dropped back down with a grimace. Everything seemed to hurt.

"Easy now," Merle rasped quietly, his own throat not working well this early. He shifted closer, making her haunted eyes focus on him again. He showed her the bottle of water, "You should drink some. It's the meds Lumen gave you for sleeping that makes your head hurt most likely. You need to drink," he explained, holding the bottle out for her to take. She slowly reached out and as soon as her fingers closed around the bottle, Merle let go and moved back to his place.

Amy looked from the bottle to him several times, "Thanks," she whispered in the end before unscrewing the cap and drinking few sips.

"Lumen is with Daryl in the next room. You want me to get her?" he asked after several uncomfortable minutes.

She seemed to think about it but shook her head 'no' in the end, still staring at the bottle in her hands. Just then the door opened and Oscar walked in with some cans in his hands, thank fuck for that, Merle thought, standing up.

Oscar took in the scene and moved to Amy, leaving the cans on the table on his way to her.

"Hey there," he said kneeling down in front of her. "You got a headache?" he asked to which she nodded, "I brought you some canned fruit, Lumen told me the sugar should help with that."

She glanced Merle's way swiftly before answering, "I'm not hungry, he gave me water."

Oscar looked back at him too, nodding, then turned back to her, "Yeah, that's good too. You need to hydrate, but you need to eat something too."

Merle watched the exchange, noticing how relaxed Amy was with Oscar right next to her. Very much the opposite of how very much not relaxed she was with him in the room.

Suddenly he didn't want to be there, he wanted to be any place other than this room.

"Hey, you tell my brother I went to check the generator when he wakes, yeah?" he said and walked out of the room heading outside. He wanted to get his smokes, he wanted a shower and maybe a new place to sleep. Maybe he'd join Axel in the cellblock. He was done with this shit.

He went to his truck and fished a pack of cigarettes immediately lighting one. He then took two canisters with fuel, deciding to try if the generator wasn't just out of juice before looking for anything else. He made a stop at the showers and then at the cafeteria for some breakfast. It must have been pretty early because he didn't see anyone else.

Deciding it was for the best, he went to the generator room. He only glanced at the two pools of blood. The only reminder of what happened in there. He was the one dragging Tomas body out of the prison after he found the liquid treasure. He drank nearly half of the bottle of the rum afterward too. Not really mad about what they did to Tomas, but because they were too late for the little woman.

He moved past the first room to the joined one where the actual generator was. He rather quickly discovered the problem isn't just an empty tank and started to look for the cause of the failure. It took some time but eventually, he was able to find it and with the tools, he found in the maintenance office he started to work on it. It wasn't anything serious, no needs for new parts, just some cleaning.

He wasn't sure how long he's been working there and drinking but at one point Lumen seemingly materialized beside him.

"Hey," she said, looking at what he was doing.

"What a joy, you finally remembered I exist, I feel honored," he hissed spitefully without taking his eyes from his task.

She looked at his face, taken aback by this response, "What are you talking about? We are together all the time."

"If you say so," he grunted, still not looking at her.

She sighed, knowing the whole situation somehow affected him more than she expected. She couldn't figure out why though. He didn't do anything wrong, he wanted to help from the very second he found out something was wrong. She was rather proud of him, to be honest. Seeing his mood now though she knew this was not the time.

"You know, the others, Rick's group I mean, they are doing a funeral for Beth. I just thought maybe you'd wanted to come."

"Yeah, you thought wrong," he said, spitting to his side, "where's Daryl anyway?"

"Still sleeping." She shrugged. She waited for few more minutes but when he continued acting as if she wasn't there, she decided to just give him his space and stood up, "Well, I'm going. You are more than welcome to join us. It might do you good, you know, to say goodbye."

"Why the fuck would I want to say goodbye?" He finally turned to look at her, "I didn't even know the bitch." He spat again and again took a swing from the bottle standing by his side.

"Alright then," Lumen said and left.

He tried to work on his task but he just couldn't, "FUCK!" he yelled, finally giving up he just threw the screwdriver to the side.

Not long after that, he found himself at the side of the cellblock C, not really sure how he even got there, watching the others standing around the hole with a simple cross. Rick and T-Dog were about to put her in it, still in the blanket in which he brought her in yesterday. He looked at all the faces, seeing that not everyone was actually there. Amy, Oscar, and Daryl weren't there. The old man was missing too, probably still too sick. But Lumen was there, not really standing with the others. She was a bit back, as was Axel. As if feeling his gaze she looked his way and even at the distance, he saw her give him a small sad smile before she turned her eyes back to the open grave. His eyes followed, watching Rick and T-Dog putting the soil back in.

"Fuck that," Merle muttered to himself, fully intended to just walk away. But he found he couldn't. He couldn't tear his eyes off the scene.

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So, it's been a while... I hope you enjoyed the chapter :)