Every time I look in the mirror, I cry, 

Every time I think, I think sad and negative,

Every time people just look at me, I feel insecure,

Every time I breathe, I feel as if I have to hold in my stomach,

Every time I go to school, I usually hide in the bathroom,

Every time someone says one mean thing about me, I cry

Every time I run away... It hurts myself, my parents, my friend.

Every time I get bullied, I cut myself.

Every time I look back at my past just to notice how many people have faked being my 'friends' because they felt bad for me, or because they thought I had issues.

Every time I look back from when I was in Elementary school and about how I would end up going home, crying, and people would always make fun of me and bully me, it makes me cry.

Every time I think about how much people have hurt me I come to realize that I hate myself more and more.

Every single time, I get an insult from someone I hate myself more and more.

Every time something like this happens to me, a little piece of soul is slowly chipping away, and soon there won't be anything left.

If I had a dime every single time someone called me 'Fat' or 'Ugly' or 'Fat Pig' I would probably live in a mansion with a yacht in my backyard lake.

I always end up doubting myself because other people always put those thoughts into my mind. I've heard the same things all the time about my appearance. And I've actually started to believe those things that other people are saying because so many people are saying those things to me. And I did nothing to them.

I feel like I'm balancing the weight of the world on my shoulders, only because of how the insults I get from people effect me and my life. And how the insults that they say weigh me down until I feel nothing. Until, I believe I am nothing. They want me to think that I'm worthless, and unwanted. And you know what? That is how I feel. No, actually—that is exactly how I feel.

I just want to be prettier. I want to be different. I want to be like other people. I want to fit in. I want to be happy.

I tried so hard to be like everyone else, because I knew being myself wasn't good enough. No one liked me for me. With the exception of my parents and best friend. Which barely count since that's not an overall vote.

I tried my best fitting in, but, yet again, my best wasn't good enough. Nothing ever was enough. I wasn't enough. I knew that. The people at my school knew that.

A lot of the time, I would cry myself to sleep just because of what other people thought of me. And I spent so long telling myself, not to believe them, but part of me didn't listen, because now I do believe them. Yes, I believe them more than ever.

A lot of the time, I cry for countless hours, just asking myself what I ever did to deserve this pain. This pain that's pounding in my heart and giving me a headache.

I try my best to hide my emotions, mental and physical pain whenever I'm at school to the best of my abilities.

And whenever someone asks me if I'm okay, it's just a reminder that I'm not.

I'm not okay at all. Not. Even. Close.

I'm distraught at the thought that people would bully others for no apparent reason at all. There's no point in any of it. It's cruel and annoying. It hurts people more than the bullies know.

People always tell me 'Well, people always bully others because they're insecure about themselves and want to take their pain out on someone else' and yes I get that. But, it still doesn't make very much sense in my opinion.

I have been to the point where, yes, I tried to end my life, multiple times. I went through a very difficult time in my life between Elementary school and Middle school.

People would taunt me to the point where, I would want to be expelled and leave the school forever so I don't have to even look at anyone else's face. Yes, I know that might sound pretty drastic but trust me. It's true. I would. And people would taunt me to the point where people would randomly come up to my lunch table and just say plainly to my face that I'm pure ugly.

And yeah, that's basically how I'm feeling right now.

Oh, and one more thing.

Whenever I would get bullied, or tormented if you'd prefer to use that term, that usually people wouldn't stand up for me at all. Once in a while, maybe. But, most of the time, on an average daily basis, no. Basically, no one would come to my rescue and save me from ending up going to the bathroom just to cry my lungs out for a long time.

Okay, now that's it. For now. I'm thankful for a lot. Clothes, food, water, parents, shelter, everything. But the one thing I wish that I had was happiness.

During the day, I'm okay, I guess. But, when night hits, it's like it's another world.

Right now all I want is for future Grace to come and tell me that everything is going to be okay, and that I'm fine, and I'm going to be successful, and happy in my future. But I know that none if that is going to happen. I'm going to continue to be the failure that I am now.