Epilogue Part 1
When Nic Does Jazz Hands, You Know Something's Up

"HEY, dumbass. Get the hell out of bed."

I ignored the voice. It was obviously just a dream, anyway. So I rolled further under the covers, getting comfier and letting the duvet take me over.

"HEY YO DUMBASS!"

That was a new voice.

Well, not a new voice. But a voice I hadn't heard in person in a little less than a year. So, by those standards, it was new. And what the voice said next was the only reason I ended up waking:

"If you don't get up in the next 5 seconds, I will be dumping this bucket of water on you! And I know just how much you missed my morning sprinkle, but I'd really rather refrain from getting you so wet at 9 in the morning!"

I basically threw the covers off of my body with part motivation to not be soaking wet and part excitement to see the person threatening me. I sprung out of bed and immediately tackled him to the ground.

"Oof!" Matteo grunted when he hit the floor. "Jesus christ, Theo, did you have to pummel me?"

"I'm not pummeling you, this is a love hug!" I exclaimed. Yeah, I was pretty much hugging Matteo flat as a pancake on the floor.

And then I felt teeth sink into my shoulder blade and I pulled back.

"Ouch!" I touched my shoulder where there was now a very evident bite mark and a smirking Matteo underneath me. "Did you seriously just bite me?"

"It was a love bite!" Matteo exclaimed, winking.

"What in the gay porn is this shit?" Nic said from the doorway, and both me and Matteo looked over at him, leaning up against the wall and shaking his head at us. "As much as I'm glad to be witnessing the bromance reunited, this might be a bit of a compromising position."

"Theo has decided he's gay for me now and we will be having sex–"

I slapped a hand over Matteo's mouth. "Let the bromance live, Nic. This is why you wanted me to wake up, isn't it?"

"It's one of the 3 reasons," Nic said. "Number one, Matteo Maldonado returns from his senior year at Syracuse to spend Christmas time with the Montgomery's. Number two, mom made cinnamon rolls, and they're fresh and hot and I'm only telling you because she made me, or else I would have stolen them all for myself. And number three..."

Nic mumbled something incoherent and then stopped leaning against the wall, backing slowly into the hallway.

"Come again?"

Nic nodded towards the hall. "Come on," he said, then he lifted his hands and splayed his fingers, waving them in the air. "Cinnamon rolls!" Nic turned and ran downstairs.

I looked down at Matteo underneath me, both of our eyebrows furrowed.

"Did Nicolas just... do jazz hands?" Matteo asked.

"That must mean something he doesn't want to tell me is number three," I said, standing up. I held out my hand to help Matteo up and then smiled, hugging him normally this time. "I'm so excited to see you, dude."

"It's been too long. How was I able to go a year without needing to wake your ass up in the morning and making you coffee?" Matteo pulled away and squeezed my shoulder, then looked down at my bare chest. "And you know what, I'm not gonna lie, I miss waking up this half-naked body of wonders."

"Thank you, Matteo, my ego needs that," I said, slipping past him to throw on a sweatshirt and head downstairs. Matteo followed in step and I could already smell the cinnamon rolls:

Pure. Goddamn. Heaven.

When we made it to the kitchen, Nic turned to look at us in the middle of drinking his coffee. He set the mug down, smiled weirdly, and did jazz hands. Again. I walked across the kitchen to grab a cinnamon roll, immediately sinking my teeth into the gooey goodness. My mom, undoubtedly, made the best fresh cinnamon rolls.

"Why are you acting like a weirdo?" I asked Nic, sitting down at the counter while Matteo poured himself a cup of coffee.

"I'm not weird," Nic denied.

I rolled my eyes. "When Nic does jazz hands, you know something's up," I said. "So spill. You said there were 3 reasons for waking me up, but you mumbled the third so quietly I couldn't understand a single word."

Nic sat on top of the counter. "One condition."

"Sure," I agreed.

"You're not allowed to be a fucking pussy."

Matteo coughed in the middle of a sip of coffee. "Holy shit!" he exclaimed, a wide grin spread across his face. "I love you, Nicolas."

"Yeah, yeah," Nic muttered, waving Matteo off and focusing on me. "We got a deal?"

"Whatever. Deal."

Nic took a sip of his coffee, set the mug down, and clasped his hands together.

"The merge party is tomorrow night. And unexpectedly, a certain Cunningham might have returned early from her business conference in Tampa," Nic said. "Which means that the entire Cunningham family will be at the merge party. Tomorrow. Night."

Cue Nic's awkward jazz hands.

And cue my simultaneous heart rate increase.

"Oh damn," Matteo muttered. "That's less than 24 hours."

"No shit," I all but breathed out.

In order to understand why Nic was being weird, why my heart rate increased when he broke the news to me, and why this was big news in the first place, there needs to be a preface. A breakdown of the past year. Starting after the explosion of Cunningham family drama. And it went something like this:

Douglas Cunningham filed for divorce and Mrs. Cunningham didn't even try to fight it. She left New York with little money and a newly fired Lance Weaver at her side. Two shit people who undoubtedly deserved each other.

I spent the second semester finishing my last business course load while trying to make up my mind on what I wanted my future to look like. I wanted history to be involved. I just hadn't known what was the right path.

Ava killed it at school. She was really focused on homework and at the same time super intensely focused on staying in touch with Cunningham & Co. Douglas Cunningham came up once a month, sometimes more, and talked to Ava about business. I sat in with them at dinners and last-minute lunches, listening to them talk about shit I never understood, and sometimes getting words in about random historical facts. Mostly because Douglas Cunningham really seemed to like my weird facts.

Nic occasionally joined the Douglas-Ava duo on their business talks. Ava's dad was, to say the least, impressed by Nic's knowledge. So were our parents. They apologized for blowing him off about a billion times.

Matteo was doing better by the time the semester was up, but once summer hit, he nearly relapsed. He started going to The Gym more and more with the motivation to get better. He always wanted to talk to Will but felt bad about the way things ended between them. So he never did.

Summer trudged on. Ava signed up for her classes, and I decided to sign up for history-related courses. Something still felt off for me, though.

Skylar and Hannah tried being together again when the semester began. It worked out better because Hannah was actually one-hundred percent positive she was bi. Skylar, to put it lightly, was ecstatic. I think she bragged about Hannah for a week straight.

Maverick was a gem as always. Nicest dude ever except for when you put him in a game of Just Dance. He thought about dating, but he never really felt the need to rush into anything. He just liked to have a good time and focused on his psychology courses.

Nic and Will were both in their senior years of high school. Will got to play Gilbert in the school's production of Anne of Green Gables, which he killed. He even dated one of his co-stars, James, for a couple of months until he called it off because James was actually kind of a douche.

Nic did significantly less partying, and when it came to his love life, it was as dry as the Sahara desert. I kept insisting on giving him Butler's phone number, but Nic brushed me off every time. And as for his sexuality, there was no coming out to our parents. It was mostly guessing when it came to Nicolas' sexual promiscuity.

He had his ups and downs. There were periods of weeks when Nic was on top of the world, cocky, nothing could stop him, and he would go hang out with groups of people from school (none of which he claimed to be real "friends", just people he killed time with). And there were other periods when he was low and not really sure what to do with himself. He was complicated and still stubborn as hell. He hardly ever accepted any help. Except when Ava could get through to him, and that was like his saving grace. I think he trusted her more than anyone else, and I should have been offended as his actual brother, but I couldn't be. Because I felt the same way about Ava.

As the semester went on and I learned a shit ton about history, some which I already knew and some which was new and exciting, I started to really dive deep into research about career options. It was my 3rd year in college. Technically, I would have graduated in another year. But still, something was off.

And then one day I found my very own saving grace, an ad on Facebook of all the dumb places:

Study Abroad: How Does Rome Sound to the Future Historian?

It was basically written for me.

I mean. I clicked on it right away and basically read through the whole website: Study abroad in Rome, learn about the history, choose from over 350 courses, broaden your perspective, live in authentic Roman housing, and find your path.

Find your path.

That's what I stuck on. Because that's what I'd been searching for. That's what Ava had been trying to help me figure out, all while giving me the space to try and do it on my own. She'd given me the courage to start searching and thinking seriously, and I did it all on my own and found a sign.

I pretty much decided it the moment I found it, at 3 in the morning on Thanksgiving Day, that my path was to go to Italy. To study abroad. To figure my own shit out. But in a place I'd always loved and admired.

I told Ava right when she came over with her family for dinner. I was so damn excited. She held my hand and smiled and said, "So you are actually running off to Italy like you joked about?"

I said, "It seems so."

And I signed up for the program, set to leave for a year once the New Year hit.

I guess I should have noticed how skeptical Ava was when I first told her. She must have thought I was crazy, and I guess I kind of was considering how fast I made my decision. But I didn't notice her skepticisms because she was so good at supporting me, being there for me, and telling me that she loved me, that I didn't even realize my choice was pushing her away until it was too late.

It happened a week before Christmas. We were sitting on a park bench in Washington Park.

We needed to break up, she said that awful night a little less than a year ago, because her timing wasn't right. Not my time, not our time: her time.

"You're the first guy I've ever been with, Theo. And I love you, I do. I love you more than I could ever describe," she'd told me, and I remember the bench was so cold. "But the fact that you're going to Italy and I'm staying here doesn't make things easy."

"I can make it easier! You could come with me," I'd said, taking her hands.

But she had shaken her head. "No, I can't. I already told you that I wouldn't, remember? I have school to finish, and you don't anymore. I have the business whereas you don't have a set plan on what you're going to do."

"Is this because of that? Because I don't know what to do with my life, so I'm going somewhere else? To try something new?

"No, Theo, never. This is because we're not in the same place we were when we started dating. When we started dating, we were going in the same general direction with college, living in the same city, and being together was so easy despite all of the drama. We came out of it stronger, we did. But the problem now is that's not true anymore. We're going in two completely different directions."

She said she didn't want the only time she got to see me be over FaceTime. She said she didn't want me to lose this opportunity that I was obviously so passionate about.

Ava told me, "This is a part of your history, Theo, there's no part of me that doesn't believe that. It's not our history. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't go just because of me. You can't throw away your shot."

She'd made the same Hamilton reference as I had when her dad announced her as the future owner of C&C. I think that's what really hit me the hardest.

I remember how Ava's hands slipped from mine, and it was like losing a chunk of my heart; it was like the big bad wolf blowing down my house that I assumed was made of steel and was actually made of paper.

That was the last night we were together. The last time she held my hand was on that park bench. The last time she hugged me was when we stood up in Washington Park and were surrounded by Christmas lights. The last time she kissed me was when I walked her to her family's apartment building and she kissed me softly, a brush against my lips, as we stood outside. The last time she called me Theodore was when she said goodbye and disappeared inside.

Since then, I went to Italy. Ava stayed at Syracuse. I had the best fucking year of my life where I worked on a project I couldn't wait to someday release into the public eye. Nic and Will graduated high school. From what Nic told me for the first 6 months when he kept me updated religiously, Ava and her dad were working with our parents on something huge:

They were merging Cunningham & Co and Montgomery Squared.

Nic was ecstatic since Ava was like a sister to him. My parents loved the idea because it not only demolished the stupid feud, but it brought our family's closer and they all loved Ava, Will, and their dad.

I was happy, too.

Just considerably more sad, as well.

So when I came home just now for Christmas with my family and for the merge party, I'd been expecting that Ava wasn't going to be there. Not like I didn't want to see her. It had been so long and I missed every part of her: from her eyes to her hair to the sound of my name slipping from her mouth. It was just that I hadn't seen her since that night when she broke up with me. I'd spent a year in Italy putting myself back together and surrounding myself in wondrous architecture, deep history, and passion projects.

And now I was going to have to see Ava tomorrow. Less than 24 hours, like Matteo said.

"He's been silent for too long," Matteo commented.

"He's pussying."

"I'm not pussying," I muttered. Except maybe I totally was. Because if I wasn't pussying, I would have eaten 2 cinnamon rolls by now. But I'd only taken a bite.

"You are," Nic said, hopping off the counter.

I looked over at Matteo. "If I'm pussying, then so is Matteo!"

Matteo raised his eyebrows. "Oh, dear. No. I'm not pussying."

"He's not pussying," Nic agreed. "Plus, he has no reason to."

"He has Will! Will is a reason!" I exclaimed, pointing at Matteo. "You had a bad break-up! You have to be pussying!"

"I'm afraid to admit that despite the shitty break-up," Matteo said, shrugging, "I'm not pussying. I'm actually really excited to see Young William again."

"Not-so-Young William, you mean," Nic said, smirking. "18 and a college Freshman at NYU? He's a bit of a hotshot now, Matteo."

"Don't you dare tease me. Or I'll invite–"

Nic scowled and Matteo cut off what he was going to say mid-sentence, taking the hint that Nic was not playing around.

"He's already coming anyway," Matteo muttered.

"Yeah, shut the hell up. Like I don't already know," Nic said.

"The point is that... I'm fine with seeing Will, and we broke up in a shit-storm of outing, homophobia, and Ex-Mrs. Cunningham drama. You should be okay seeing Ava, shouldn't you?"

I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "Theoretically–"

"Theo-retically!" Matteo exclaimed with a wink.

I ignored him. "Theoretically, yes. Except for the fact that I'm not ready to see her because nothing's changed. Because I still love her and I'm still me."

I stood up, suddenly overwhelmed and unsure of how to act.

"I'm still me and that's not good enough."

❥❥❥

The jet lag was killing me, but somehow I still made it to my dad's last meeting of the day discussing the final procedures of tomorrow's merge with Montgomery Squared. I was paying full attention, don't get me wrong.

But I might have also been discreetly reading Nicolas Montgomery's texts under the table.

NIC: bet. there's going to be a cake w our faces

AVA: bet. no way in hell

NIC: bet. yes way in hell. did you hear my parents the other day on the phone meeting? they were practically calling us godly. tHe FuTuRe FaCeS oF bUsInEsS

AVA: we are the future faces of business, nicolas, don't even try it w me

NIC: yeah yeah...

NIC: focus on your meeting. i have some things to take care of, myself

I could assume what he had to take care of, and I didn't ignore the jump in my heart rate when I read his text. I responded and didn't bother censoring myself.

AVA: theo related?

The response came almost immediately.

NIC: you already know it

I stopped looking at my phone, tucking it away in my pocket and focusing on the last few minutes of the meeting. My dad caught my eye, and he raised his eyebrow as a way that told me he could tell I'd been looking at my phone and he was asking if everything was okay. I gave him a nod of reassurance, but then he gave me The Eye. If there was one thing about my dad:

He knew. And he would give you The Eye to let you know that he wasn't fooled. Of course, he wouldn't say anything about it, especially not during a business meeting.

Underneath the table, I toyed with the rose gold band of my watch, watching the second hand as it ticked and passed the small golden flowers on one side of the miniature clock. I didn't have to look because I could feel the engraved message on the back of the clock, pressing into my wrist and tugging my heart back in the direction of the guy who'd given it to me.

My dad wrapped up the meeting by handing out the passes that would let everyone into the C&C-MG2 merge party tomorrow night. My dad and the Montgomery's gave Nic and I the task of deciding where the merge party should be held. They said it was as much our party as it was theirs. If not more.

When Nic and I sat down to talk about venues, there was really only one spot we found absolutely perfect for the occasion. We weren't sure that we would get approved to use the space, but when we finally got the news that the space was ours for the night of the merge party, we were ecstatic. It was why I needed to fly home early to be able to get to the party rather than staying at the conference in Tampa for one of my business courses this past semester. It had been an optional trip, ungraded and for educational purposes only, so I didn't necessarily feel bad for leaving early.

Besides, I already knew that tomorrow night would go down in history.

The Cunninngham's and the Montgomery's had been feuding for as long as pretty much everyone in the business world can remember. But tomorrow night, our families were merging their companies. Overall, it was the best decision. It wasn't just a gesture created to show that our families were actually close, or to prove to ourselves that we all got along and cared for each other. It was also the best possible financial and business growth option we could have gone with. Two of the biggest businesses in New York City merging to create one huge power company?

Yeah. There was nothing better.

Once the meeting was done and everyone left the meeting room, my dad took of his glasses (which he usually only wore for business purposes) and focused on me. He clasped his hands together and sat back in his chair.

"Do we need to have a father-daughter meeting?" he asked.

I sighed. He gave me The Eye again. There was no reason to hide anything from my dad anymore. We'd gotten long past the family drama, and I knew how much my dad meant to me. We didn't have secrets anymore, and he was undeniably and irrevocably supportive.

"Nic was texting me," I told him. "And he just barely mentioned..." I trailed off.

He picked it up. "Theo," he said, and I nodded.

Theo. Theodore. God, how long it had been since I'd seen his face. And the last time I saw him, it hadn't been at our best moment. There was a hurt on his face, as if something inside of him collapsed the moment I said we needed to break-up.

I hated the thought that I'd hurt Theo. There had been a time he'd hurt me with his own words, his inability to admit his feelings. But then things flipped around and I was the one doing the hurting. And something told me he was worse off than I'd ever been. Because what we had together hadn't been so simple, so small. It had been large, built tall and strong like the greatest Roman cathedrals.

And suddenly, he was left behind in dispersion through rubble and ash.

I didn't break up with him because he was a bad person, or because anything went wrong with the two of us, or because he wasn't the most amazing fucking guy I'd ever met. Wrong. I only did it to give him the space he needed to go off and do what he might have been made to do. And maybe it was true that I needed that space, as well, to get through college courses and heavy business conferences and internships in order to grow myself.

"He's going to be there tomorrow night. I know he wasn't expecting to see you," my dad said, drawing my attention back to the matter at hand and not the picture of Theo standing amidst a disastrous collapse of our love.

"I assume you've talked to him recently."

My dad nodded. He and Theo were still close, much like Nic and his parents were still close to me. I wish I could have been close to Theo, too. The only problem was that I wasn't sure it would ever be easy being close to Theo but not actually being with him.

I was glad, though, that my dad and Theo could still get along and talk to each other. Because I knew how highly my dad thought of Theo and vice versa. My dad had been extremely supportive when it came to Theo's decision to go to Italy. He understood just as much as I did that Theo's impulsive choice wasn't unwarranted: Italy had been calling his name far before I entered his life.

"Ava, honey, you broke up with him because it needed to happen. He's still not over it, but I think that's justifiable," my dad told me. "He's the first boy you've been with, the first you've ever loved, and even though I love the shit out of that boy myself, we both know you needed to experience life without him. And he needed to experience life without you, too. Whether he realizes it or not.

"From what I know, you opened him up in ways he'd never been opened up before. You gave him a profound love that he'd never thought himself to be capable of. You gave him the strength to pursue what he's really passionate about, too. You let him go so that he could study abroad without attachments, without burdens, without things holding him back."

"Just because I had a reason for breaking up with him doesn't mean he understands it. He probably just thinks that I didn't want to be with him, even though I tried my best to explain it," I argued.

"No, you're right. Maybe he doesn't fully understand. But I think you'll come to see that Theo's past year has opened him up just as much as, if not more than, you were able to. He came back from his trip and I sat down with him for dinner. He's as fine a young man as he always has been," my dad leaned forward, "but he's grown even more."

I sighed. "Why are you telling me all of this?"

"Because I thought you should know. Theo doesn't hate you, he's just impacted heavily by what happened. But I think he's done some serious growth in this past year, and I think that if he can handle seeing you," he paused and reached across the table to lay his hand atop mine, "then you certainly can handle seeing him, as well. All that matters is what's in your heart."

And no, I couldn't be sure what was in my heart. But somewhere, I knew, was Theodore Montgomery. And I held his name pressed to my wrist everyday regardless.

❥❥❥

Or don't hate me because of what I've done

PLEASE IM BEGGING TRUST ME HERE

I—

Okay. Yes. I'm evil. Ava and Theo broke up. For a whole year. Y'all might be M A D howeverrrr I HAVE MY REASONS!!! I PROMISE.

There are still 2 epilogue parts left to come, and I can assure y'all, as with all my epilogues in the past, they will wrap this story up oh so nicely. And wonderfully.

Just bear with meeeeeeeeeeeee : )

There are great things to come. Not only for our favorites, Ava and Theo. Promise.

Actually, one of my favorite parts of the entire book comes in the next epilogue. It's fucking EVERYTHING TO ME. I wrote it MONTHS before I was even close to finishing this book. It was one of those things that came to me at like 3am and I couldn't get out of my head. So I promise I WONT LET YALL DOWN.

In the mean time, I'm posting a second chapter of my newest book Hopeless Romantic as well today. So check her out if you haven't : ) I'm listening to her playlist currently and it's one of my favorites by far. Can't lie.

I'll see how soon I can get the second epilogue up for your enjoyment. And to mend the wound I have otherwise created by this break-up. I know. It hurts me too. But I'm just gonna make cinnamon rolls and roll with it.

(And a Harry gif to apologize) (Ily)