Tears pouring down my face. All I could think of is how worthless and useless I was. Despair clouding my thoughts and tears blurring my vision. I should have never let them in! This is all my fault! I can't! Shuichi could have gotten hurt because of me... I'm so useless. My shoulders slumped. I let myself go limp in his arms. The world went dark... I couldn't see anything, everything went silent, and my breath seemed to stop. Is this what it's like to die?...

.  .  .

The scene played in my head over and over again. Screaming at me that I should have never trusted them. Yelling at me that I was just hurting the one I'm trying to protect. I wish things were different. I wish Kaede and Rantaro were still here. I wish we could have been reunited as friends, not survivors...

Shick

I turned around and saw Kaede on the ground with a dart in her neck. I took a closer look at her. She was still breathing, so it must have been something to just knock her out. I looked up and saw Rantaro had been hit with a similar dart. Except...

His eyes were turning red. Blood dripped down his mouth and was filling in his eyes. I paled. Shuichi gasped from beside me. I couldn't think. I didn't want to have to kill anyone else. My heart was pounding. My thoughts screaming at me. Telling me why the hell did I let these people in?! Why did I let this happen?!

"Shuichi we have to go! NOW!!" I screamed, grabbing his hand pulling him away from Kaede's body. "K-Kokichi? What just happened?" He looked sick. I shouldn't have let them in. What if this was just a setup? This whole time I thought we could trust them... but I was wrong just like last time.

Every time the memory replayed in my head I could see the look of despair on their faces. Consuming them in my memory. Marking their faces with blood. Suffocating till they finally give in and their life gets taken from them...

I felt sick. I couldn't move, I couldn't see, I didn't even know if I was still breathing. Shuichi I'm so sorry. I was supposed to be strong for you. You must be so mad at me for being so weak. I need to make sure you're safe, but I couldn't even do that... I'm sorry... That I was the one you had to be stuck with. You deserve so much more than me, a better leader, a better lover.

The darkness took all of the breath from my lungs. I gasped for air, trying to breathe, only to suffocate on the silence, the darkness, this void that caged me. 

Shuichi, can you hear me? I need to tell you that I love you more than anything. I'm sorry for being so weak. I understand if you don't want to be with me anymore. I respect your decision if you don't want me anymore. I know I should have been better for you. Been better at protecting you, being strong for you, being better for you. It would have been better if I was infected instead of Kaito... It would be better for you if I was dead... because then you would be safe... with him... you would be able to make it... without me. You wouldn't have almost gotten infected because of my foolish mistakes. You wouldn't have gotten hurt seeing Kaede and Rantaro right before they both died. I made your life terrible... even before all of this... you would have been so much better with someone other than me... someone better than me. Anyone else would have been better for you than me. The weak, stupid, useless, Kokichi...

I'm sorry for everything Shuichi.

cough

cough

Cough

COUGH

Life took me back in a second. Light surrounded my vision, blinding me. My hands went to cover my eyes only to be held back by another hand I knew so well. Shuichi... "I...'m...so...rry..." I coughed out some blood coming out of my burning throat. "Kokichi! You're awake! Are you doing alright?" He asked immediately handing me a water bottle and some pills. 

They were the pills we had for when our throats got dry when we went out on long journeys outside. Because of the dry atmosphere outside, it could make your throat so dry that you could cough up blood. We found out that this wasn't connected with the virus. The first time it happened Shuichi thought I was going to die... but soon after we found out it was just a dry throat.

"Wh...what...ha...ppened?" I asked voice scratchy. "Drink your water first." He took a chair and sat in front of me. "When Rantaro and Kaede got left in the mall I noticed something..." He paused putting his hand to his chin. 

"Yeah?" I asked wanting him to continue. "When you grabbed my hand and dragged me out of there... I think I saw Maki there." The room went silent. Maki was there? I thought she went to Peko... So if she's alive... what does that mean?

"I was confused as well... for a moment I didn't think it was real. But no doubt about it... I saw Maki." My jaw dropped. "What was she doing there then?!" I asked my voice feeling better after I took the pills and drank some water. "The last thing I saw before we left the mall... she was injecting something into Rantaro's neck. I couldn't see what it was..." "What could she have injected in him?" What is going on? Maki never would hurt anyone unless she had too. Maybe that's the case here... But who would have asked her to inject Rantaro?

"I'm not sure... you know Maki better than I do, but I do know she would never hurt someone..." "Unless she had too..." I added with a sigh. "Yeah..." Shuichi went quiet. I'm sure he was blaming himself for not finding Maki earlier. Maybe Peko and Fuyuhiko have something to do with all of this. "Maybe she knows something we don't." Shuichi looked at me. "Like what?" I put my thumb in between my lips. "It might have something to do with the cure," I said making Shuichi gasp. "But I thought that this was uncurable." 

"Well maybe that's the thing she knows that we don't"

-Plot twist! It is becoming very twisty... Sorry... that was weird... this is definitely taking a turn. Whoops? Thanks for reading!-

-ShuichiOuma010-