Fuck Witcha

RoastMasterV2: hey so im a little confused about next week

RoastMasterV2: ik cam is coming in and like staying for a while so does that mean like a bunch of group stuff or is it one big hangout and then we leave cam to fend for himself

Fitz: please dont abandon me i am BROKE

Fitz: i used all my money on a plane ticket and whatevrr i have left im saving for sustenance

RoastMasterV2: i know a nice bridge you can sleep under!!! the local homeless people are a little stabby tho

Fitz: okay so DONT call you when im at my lowest point got it

Fitz: good thing i dont need to sleep under a bridge tho bc brian was so kind and generous and offered me his couch

Moo: couch???? doesnt that rich mf have a two bedroom????

Terroriser: why on earth would i buy a second bed when im just one person

Terroriser: the other bedroom is just storage trust me the couch is better

Terroriser: and no offense to cam but i am NOT sharing a bed with a stranger

ChokingIsMyKink: you just let ANYONE into that apartment with you huh

Terroriser: tf does that mean

WildHoe: as of right now evan we are just doing the one big thing but since cam is gonna be here for a while we'll probably plan more stuff later on

ChokingIsMyKink: you know what it means BRIAN

BasicallyIGetFucked: crazy energy in the chat rn

ChokingIsMyKink: ILL KILL YOU WITH A GUN.

Moo: ....

Moo: is it because hes black?

RoastMasterV2: ofc YOUD make that joke

Moo: im sick of this shit

Kryoz: omg evan rhat was soooooo funny LMAOOOOOOOOO

RoastMasterV2: ?????????

ChokingIsMyKink: LMFAO

WildHoe: is it just me or are things making a crazy amount of sense rn

Lui: no ur right

RoastMasterV2: am i the only one confused???

Kryoz: omg no way rhats soooooo crazy how we're both confused rn

Kryoz: bc i mean like maybe someone else is too confused to say anything idk like talking is hard i

RoastMasterV2: did you hit your head recently?

Kryoz: no y

RoastMasterV2: im worried about you

ChokingIsMyKink: here we go-

Kryoz: OMG UR WORRIED ABOUT ME??? thats soooooo crazyyy omg

Kryoz: ill go to the doctors if you want me to

Terroriser: what the fuck?

RoastMasterV2: uhhh

RoastMasterV2: if you feel okay then no need to go to the doctors

Kryoz: ur right that was so stupid of me hahahaahaha

Kryoz: actually i have something to do rn bye guys!!!!!!!!

RoastMasterV2: did anyone else see that???

WildHoe: unfortunately

Four07: im telling yall its just some delayed break up mania

DaithiDeNoPrivilege: bro is cooked fr

Moo: he sure is something

Moo: anyways!

Moo: it is probably better to plan SOME things out

Lui: cam how long are you here for

Fitz: forever i am on the run from the law

Terroriser: WHAT

WildHoe: bro rlly got a criminal coming to live with him

Fitz: im KIDDING

Fitz: ive only bought a one way rn but i was thinking a week and a half??? i was gonna see how long i could stay at a hotel before i went broke but now that im staying with brian i am worried about overstaying my welcome-

Terroriser: i literally dont mind at all!

RoastMasterV2: so we all just moved on from john being....????????

ChokingIsMyKink: hes a weird guy what can you say

Moo: we should throw a party!!!

Terroriser: pls dont say at my place pls dont say at my place

Moo: at brians place!

Terroriser: FUCK

ChokingIsMyKink: so youll let any bitch into your apartment but a PARTY is where you draw the line???????

ChokingIsMyKink: yea things are making a whole lot of sense rn

Terroriser: how about i shoot you with a gun.

WildHoe: okay i dont know whats the drama here but yes we should have a party but idk if brians place is a good location i mean brock and marcel have the biggest place i think

Moo: thats true we ARE renting a whole house

Terroriser: yk craig if i didnt know better id say youd want to live with me

ChokingIsMyKink: I AM NOT OBSESSED WITH YOU.

Lui: dude literally no one said that

——

D.S.A.W.

Moo: hes totally in love with him wtf

Lui: i dont think ive ever seen john tweak out rhat much he must got it BAD

Terroriser: everytime he typed something else i tried not to vomit

Terroriser: hes SO EMBARRASSING

WildHoe: should we tell evan?

Moo: NO

ChokinyIsMyKink: why not :((((

WildHoe: exactly what if theyre soulmates :(

Terroriser: i hope not i DO NOT want to see both of them tweaking out

Terroriser: john is bad enough

Lui: omg is that why you suggested a party brock???

Moo: YESSSSSS

Moo: we are gonna set them up!!!!

Terroriser: guys idk how to break this to you but our schemes like never work

LuKe: is it weird that we're still here??

LuKe: like i am literally on the couch next to jon and we're talking about setting his ex up with someone else.

Lui: thats exactly why you should be here

Terroriser: do you even have a plan

Moo: i was just gonna lock em in a room together tbh

ChokingIsMyKink: anyone else wondering why brian is soooooo against this match up????

Terroriser: i feel like my concerns are valid!!!

Terroriser: everytime theres a scheme and it revolves around evan and his relationship it NEVER ends well

WildHoe: im gonna put this screenshot in the slideshow at their wedding

Terroriser: alright fuck it lets play match maker ig

Moo: YAYAYAYYAYYAYYAYA

BasicallyIGetFucked: wait wdym the party is at our house

———

Now showing private messages between Terroriser and RoastMasterV2

Terroriser: you should talk to jon

RoastMasterV2: oh?

RoastMasterV2: what brought this on?

Terroriser: all that stuff you said about getting craig back

Terroriser: and it made me remember that we also have a second common enemy

Terroriser: someone of the psychotic persuasion

RoastMasterV2: wait omg ur right

RoastMasterV2: but i kinda got over the whole kidnapping and shit

Terroriser: werent you literally fearinf for your life for like a month and a half

RoastMasterV2: okay so im not over it are you happy

Terroriser: lets get him back

Terroriser: yk he did a LOT of shit and then we're just gonna let him slide with a broken heart???

Terroriser: fuck! that!

RoastMasterV2: omg is this what you were feeling during our talk

Terroriser: lets get him back ev

RoastMasterV2: LETS GET HIM BACK

RoastMasterV2: did you have anything in particular in mind? Because i could just text him but i need a direction to go in yk

Terroriser: let's get him to the party

Terroriser: I want to see his face when we "set you up" with john (bc yeah thats a thing that they're planning in the other chat apparently)

RoastMasterV2: that doesn't surprise me at all tbh

RoastMasterV2: except I thought they were gonna start setting me up when we hang out next week?

Terroriser: its a plan with many steps

Terroriser: and i especially want to see the look on jons face when you and I leave the party together

RoastMasterV2: oh? so you HAVE been scheming

Terroriser: nothing concrete or an announcement or whatever- he doesn't even have to think we're dating

Terroriser: just a flesh wound to know that even though he tried real hard to tear us apart we still ended up on top closer than ever

Terroriser: and it plants the seed that you two are NEVER getting back together

RoastMasterV2: well

Terroriser: NO

Terroriser: evan you're right about all this. getting them back

Terroriser: but if you want to get them back, then you have to accept that we are going to burn these bridges. we're getting more than even and then we are moving on.

Terroriser: no more back and forth

Terroriser: no more will they or wont they

Terroriser: it is us severing the connection- we are NOT going back to these people under any circumstances

RoastMasterV2: you're right

RoastMasterV2: hey do you want to go on another date btw?