#COMM

Chapter 11

Jasper and the guys remained standing from a distance. Aidan, on the other hand, seemed to not get the words, even though I tried to be as verbose so that he'd understand me. Nanatili lang siya na naka-upo sa tabi ko. Good thing the drinks finally came.

"Mags, come on—"

"My God. Is there a shortage of girls, Aidan? Why do you keep bothering me? I already said that there's no chance. What part of it don't you understand because I'll elaborate for you," I calmly said while pouring myself a glass. I do drink occasionally—with cousins, with friends. Only if I was sure that there would be people who'd look after me. Only tonight, I had my guys with me.

Ewan ko. I didn't know them personally, but I believed them when they said that they'd literally take a bullet for me. Kinilig ako ng konti kahit pinagdasal ko na 'wag naman sanang mangyari. They have families and I'd hate myself kapag ako ang naging dahilan kapag may mangyari na masama.

"I keep on bothering you because you never tried to listen," he said, sounding pitiful, but I knew better. Aidan's a player and I played his game... too bad I got burned. But okay na ako, e. I was doing better... having another problem that I was beginning to think was worse.

And that problem was staring at me. Grabe siya tumingin! Ramdam ko kahit hindi ako tumingin sa kanya, e!

Ignoring Aidan for the rest of the night, I shifted my attention on the drinks. And on the fourth shot of Cuervo, I started to loosen up. Tumayo ako at saka lumapit kina Nico.

"Have a drink with me naman," I said, offering the shot glass.

"Ma'am uuwi na ba tayo?" Nico said, instead.

"It's only 11pm!" I said, shoving the shot glass on his face. Muntik ko nang matapunan si Nico sa mukha ng tequila, if not for Jasper catching my hand.

"You're drunk," Jasper stated.

I shook my head and giggled. "I am most definitely not!" And I didn't know why I kept on laughing! Wala naman siyang sinabi na funny, pero natatawa talaga ako! But I begged myself not to touch him kahit na I badly wanted to touch his face. And then slap him. And then sabunutan siya.

God, tequila. I always get violent when I'm drunk.

"Your mom will—"

"Blah blah blah," I mocked him. "Mom's in Rome. Dad's in Barcelona. Call them. I dare you," I said with a sinister smile. He remained quiet. "I thought so," sabi ko bago nagtry na bumalik sa couch. The ground was beginning to look like squiggly lines kaya naman halos masubsob na ako sa couch—buti na lang nasalo ako ni Aidan.

"You really can't hold your liquor, love," he said while trying to help me sit down. "Why don't I take you home?"

I shook my head. "Jasper will take me home..." I whispered.

"Who? That guard?" he asked, his forehead creased. I nodded. "Maggie, what's happening to you? Don't get yourself in trouble."

"You're trouble yourself."

He actually looked hurt. "Maggie... I really fucking hate myself for doing that. Won't you really ever forgive me?"

I laughed because that's exactly what was happening. But it's not as if I had control over who I'd like. And it's not as if something would ever happen. Kasi judging from what was happening, hanggang imagination na lang talaga ako.

And it's so sad.

"If... I slept with your friend, will you forgive me?" I asked him. He remained silent. "If... you caught me in bed with him, naked and sweaty... will you be able to forget it and say that everything's gonna be okay?"

He was quiet. I hoped he understood where I was coming from. I loved him—sobra... but he hurt me, too—sobra. And with what he did? There's just no coming back from that. He should've known. Alam niya iyong nangyari sa mga magulang ko... but he still dared do the very same thing.

"Thought so," I said and then stood up. Nagsimula akong pumunta kay Jasper para sabihin na gusto ko na umuwi pero ramdam ko na naka-sunod pa rin sa akin si Aidan.

I groaned. "Oh, my god, just go home," I said. My head was beginning to spin and I knew I had no patience to tolerate Aidan for tonight. He's slowly turning from pathetic to pesky.

"Can't drive, love. I'm drunk," he said.

I rolled my eyes. "You have a driver, Aidan. I'm drunk, but not stupid," I said and then looked at Jasper who looked like he was ready to snap Aidan's neck—but of course nag-iimagine na naman ako. I should really think of a title dito sa movie sa imagination ko.

"Let's go," I told Jasper and the guys. Dahan-dahan akong naglakad.

"Nico," Jasper just said tapos nabigla ako na inaalalayan na ako ni Nico pababa sa stairs.

I frowned and whispered, "Ayaw talaga sa akin ng Sir mo..."

Nico smiled. "Selos lang 'yan, Ma'am."

"Talaga?"

He nodded. "Akala ko nga bubunot ng baril kanina, e."

"Tss. Malaki ka talagang paasa," sabi ko bigla.

Napa-kamot siya sa ulo. "Si Ma'am nagtatanong tapos sa akin din nagagalit. Bagay kayo ni Sir talaga..." sabi niya tapos tahimik akong inalalayan hanggang sa makarating kami sa sasakyan.

I thought matatahimik na ako. I was in dire need of sleep dahil sa buong araw na work tapos stressful pa na nangyari kanina.

"What the—"

I opened my eyes and saw Aidan sitting beside me tapos si Jasper naman ay nasa shotgun. What the freak happened?!

"Why are you here?!" I hissed. He's being immensely annoying! Aidan just shrugged. I turned at Jasper. "Why is he here?!"

"Bakit 'di siya tanungin mo?"

"Come again?" I asked. Feeling ko biglang nawala iyong pagiging tipsy ko. Did... I just really hear him speak in Tagalog?

"Paalisin mo kung gusto mo," he said again. In TAGALOG.

"God, I must really be drunk..." I whispered to myself.

"Bawal kang mag-uwi ng lalaki," Jasper continued.

Kinusot ko iyong eyes ko and tried to look for bottled water inside the car. Good thing my tumbler was still on the cup holder. I was about to reach for it nang abutin iyon ni Jasper.

"Hey! I'm thirsty!"

"Kanina pa 'to di—"

"And please speak in English again. Kinikilabutan ako sa Tagalog mo."

Hindi pa rin niya inabot iyong water sa akin.

"Pauwiin mo na siya," sabi niya sabay turo kay Aidan na mukhang naguguluhan sa sinasabi ni Jasper.

"What? Gusto mo ba sipain ko siya palabas ng sasakyan?" I asked him incredulously—but he nodded! And I was just kidding! Bakit ko naman sisipain ng literal si Aidan? He's not an animal! And even animals don't deserve to be treated that way.

"Magagalit Mama mo," sabi niya na parang bata.

"Alam mo, it's really rude to speak in Tagalog when you know naman na French siya at hindi nakakaintindi ng Tagalog," I said, but the brute just continued to speak in Tagalog. Hindi lang siya dull boy, rude boy din.

"Siya ang nasa Pilipinas, siya ang mag-adjust."

My lips just parted. Biglang nawala iyong dull boy at parang boy na lang 'yung nasa harap ko.

"Are you for real?" I asked, unable to believe the words that came out of Jasper's mouth. He remained silent. I turned to Aidan. "Leave," I said. He was about to say something, but I cut him off. "For the love of all that's holy, leave, Aidan, before I ask Jasper to literally kick you out of the car." And I was sure that Jasper would not even think twice. Kanina pa kaya niya mukhang gustong suntukin si Aidan.

I gently push Aidan out of the car. Lumabas din ako para hanapin iyong sasakyan niya. Nagulat ako nang bigla niya akong yakapin mula sa likuran. I was stunned.

"Aidan, what are you doing?" I asked, trying to get him off me. Mas lalo niya lang hinigpitan iyong yakap niya.

"Maggie, I'm sorry..."

"You're being pathetic, Aidan. Stop it."

I felt him shaking his head. "Losing you is the worst thing that ever happened to me, Maggie. I just... can't lose you. Permanently."

His voice sounded so pained. Na para bang nagsisisi talaga siya sa ginawa niya... sa panloloko niya sa akin kahit ginawa ko naman lahat para sa kanya... For a second, I wanted to give in and listen to his excuses... but I remembered Jasper's voice inside my head. 'Cheating is a conscious decision. It's not an involuntary reaction. He chose to cheat on you. It's his fault. It's never your fault. Stop blaming yourself.'

"You already lost me, Aidan," I whispered. "Just give it up. Please."

"No," he said, loosening his hold. "But one day, we'll talk, Maggie," he said. I ignored him. I had ways to avoid him—lalo na siguro kapag nainis ako sa kanya at sinabi ko na sa mga kapatid ko iyong dahilan kung bakit talaga kami naghiwalay. My brothers are not violent in nature, but I was pretty sure that they'd get violent for me. Love kaya nila ako kahit bwisit sila.

Nang makapasok siya sa sasakyan niya, tahimik ako na bumalik sa sasakyan. That talk, even though it only lasted for a few seconds, drained the remaining energy in me. I just kept on sighing... and wishing for this day to end already.

Hanggang sa makauwi kami, tahimik lang ako. Nagulat ako dahil mas nauna pa si Jasper na pumunta sa guest house. Usually, he'd wait for me to come inside—minsan nga hinahatid niya pa ako sa mismong harap ng kwarto ko when he's feeling extra-paranoid.

"Ano'ng problema nun?" I uttered to myself.

"Pinagselos niyo kaya, Ma'am," bulong ni Kellan sa akin tapos tumango naman si Nico.

Agad na kumunot ang noo ko. "Ano'ng selos? Ni hindi nga kami nag-usap!"

"Si Ma'am... nagyakapan pa nga kayo nung ex mo. Nakita nga namin, e. Malamang nakita rin ni Sir!" sabi ni Kellan. Tapos tumango na naman si Nico.

"Hindi naman ako crush nun kaya bakit siya magseselos?" I asked, trying to fish information. Ang desperate ko na, gosh! But as long as hindi ko naman bino-bother si Jasper... wala naman sigurong masama. Ako naman 'yung nasasaktan sa mga ginagawa ko, e.

"Ma'am..." parang hirap na hirap na sabi ni Kellan. "Di mo ba nakita si Sir buong gabi? Mukhang muntik na sapakin 'yung ex mo."

Umiling ako. "Hindi. Hindi ko naman siya tinignan buong gabi," I honestly said. I willed myself not to look at Jasper because even a single glance would tempt me... and I was already desperately tempted... I didn't need any more tempting.

"Nico, ikaw nga ang kumausap kay Ma'am," parang naiinis na nahihirapan na sabi ni Kellan.

Nico sighed and looked at me. "Ma'am..." panimula ni Nico. "Mahina akong makaintindi ng ibang bagay... pero tanga lang ang hindi makakapansin sa inyong dalawa."

Umiling ako. Nang sobra. No. They shouldn't feed fuel to the fire I was badly trying to put out!

"No," I said, desperately shaking my head. "Wag nga kayong nagsasabi ng ganyan."

Kellan sighed. "Pustahan tayo, Ma'am, 'pag pumunta kami sa guest house, makikita namin na nagpupush-up si Sir."

"Ha? Ano naman connect?"

"Ganoon si Sir kapag frustrated at naiinis, dinadaan sa exercise. At sa takbo ng mga nangyayari sa 'yo at sa ex mo, baka maging ala-wrestler na 'yung katawan ni Sir."

I shook my head vehemently.

"Sige nga, Ma'am, punta ka sa guest house," Nico urged.

"No," I answered.

"Ayie. Takot kang malaman, Ma'am?"

"Shut up, Nico."

Napa-kamot siya. "Bakit ba lagi akong nasa-shut up?" tanong niya kay Kellan tapos tinapik lang ni Kellan iyong likod niya.

I excused myself para matulog na. Umakyat ako sa taas at mabilis na nagpalit ng damit. But even after I dressed up and was ready for bed, I kept on turning. Hindi ako maka-tulog! Kainis!

After what felt like hours of turning, I finally stood up and grabbed something to cover my nightgown and quietly walked downstairs. Tulog na lahat sa bahay pero may naka-salubong ako na guard na nag-iikot. I just asked him to ignore me.

Nang makarating ako sa guest house, I was expecting to find all the lights to be off... but when I peeped at the window, there was Jasper... doing push-ups... and it's freaking 2 am!