I was at home, sitting on my bed. Thinking. My room had always sent this peaceful vibe to me that I could never describe. The cracked, lilac painted walls. My french floral curtains. My cedar wood canopy bed. Everything was mine, but none of it felt real. Like I was sleepwalking. 

Suddenly, my phone buzzed beside my head on my pillow. I picked it up, and saw just the name I was hoping for. 

Blue was my very gay, very flamboyant best friend. His real name was Auriel, but everyone called him Blue because of his harsh blue hair dye. We had been  friends since we were toddlers, and he used to be my neighbor. Then, he came out to his parents, and everything fell to shit. His dad refused to accept that his son was an, and I quote, " boy kisser," So his mom took him with her to New York, were he currently lives. 

Blue and I still Text each other and snapchat and skype and every other form of social media you could think of, so we knew everything that was going on in each others lives. Well, almost everything. I had still yet to tell him that I was pregnant.

" Hey Boo-boo. Whats a goin' on?" His text read.

Me: nothin' much.

BlueBear: How are things going with the boylyfriend? :)

Me: Oh....about that....

BlueBear: DID CARTER FUCKING HURT U IF HE DID I WILL FIND HIM AND MURDER HIM WITH MY BARE HANDS.

Me: NONONONO! it's not like that Blue.

BlueBear: Oh ok. What did he do? Or what did u do? Hayley Amelia Sanders I swear if u did something to this boy i will hurt u too **

Me: BLUE NO ON HURT EACH OTHER! god

BlueBear: Then just tell me wats wrong.

me: Blue, this is hard!

BlueBear: oh god just spit it out!

" Okay Blue, your gonna hate me forever." I said out loud.

me: Im pregnant.........

BlueBear:........

Bluebear:...........

BlueBear: Oh god Hayley.

I couldn't answer. I didn't have the GUT to answer. I shut my phone off. Suddenly my room didn't feel comfortable anymore. It felt cramped and claustrophobic. Oh God, the world was spinning. I rushed to the bathroom and threw up what ever little bits I had eaten the whole day. I hadn't even told mom yet. Another lost friend. Another lost life.