Niall's parents had been living apart for five months but they were still trying to save their marriage, which gave me hope. I couldn't imagine throwing away all those years they had together.

Niall was doing better now that the initial shock was over. But I think he was grieving more over the fact that he didn't get to grow up with his brother than the fact that his parents were having problems. Niall and Greg wanted to try to get in touch and build a relationship, but it wouldn't be the same. Sometimes Niall wondered what it would have been like if he had never moved here from Ireland in the first place. He tells me that he never regretted moving here but still he wonders if things might have been different if his parents had dealt with all of this earlier on.

I did my best to stand by him and encourage him not to dwell on the what-ifs. As expected, he was moving through his senior year with flying colors and I loved watching him excel at everything he did. It was kind of a vicarious experience for me since, as I've mentioned, since  wasn't exactly the go-getter that Niall is.

I was starting to appreciate Valentine's Day. That is until Niall gave me the news that would break my heart.

"I got accepted to Stanford," he told me, watching my reaction carefully.

I was very proud, I really was. But the blatant truth was that he would be moving away in the fall and that tore me apart.

"I'm happy for you," I smiled, trying to be genuine in spite of the tears that came.

"Aw, Meg, don't cry," he shushed me. "We'll find lots of ways to keep in touch. I'll come home to see you on every break. And you can come out to visit me in California."

"I know," I nodded. "I just don't want to lose you."

"You're not going to lose me," he assured me, kissing me passionately. "Besides, we have lots to look forward to before I leave. It's only February. We still have months before I'm done with school, then we have the prom to look forward to. You're still going with me, right?" I nodded. "And we'll have all summer together."

"I know," I said, drying my face. "I just don't want to think about it right now, okay?"

"Gotcha," he said in reply. "As much as I'm excited about going to my dream school, I know it will be hard to leave ya."

All that time we had ahead of us soon became a memory. It was going much too fast and I could do nothing to stop it. Niall and I had a wonderful time at his prom, he graduated with honors and he was the class Valedictorian. He had the world at his fingertips and I couldn't have been more proud.

But I knew that I would lose him to California sooner than I wanted (which was never).

The summer was unforgiving in its onward march towards the dreaded day. Luckily, Stanford's first day for undergraduates wasn't until late in September, so Niall was leaving around the 15th.

But still, he was leaving.

We spent every possible moment together during the summer.

"Tell ya what, Meg," Niall said one breezy evening as we sat in the treehouse. "Next summer."

"Next summer what?"

"Next summer we'll take our road trip," he said definitively.

"Route 66?" I asked.

"Yeah," he nodded. "I know it didn't work out this summer because I haven't been working and saving money. But I'll have a job this year so-"

"You'll have a job to help you pay for college," I reminded him.

"Shh," he said. "I'll have a job and I'll make sure to set aside some money for us. Besides, you should be able to save money this year, too."

"Yes, because I won't be spending money on your sorry jobless ass all the time."

"Hey," he pouted.

"It's true. You'll be gone so I won't be paying for us to go out every weekend and feeding your endless appetite for super fudge milkshakes."

"I guess," he laughed. "But I'm absolutely serious, Meg. Let's do it."

"Which place are you looking forward to the most?" I asked, thinking that maybe the excitement about the trip would help me get through the year.

He thought for a while and couldn't come up with anything right away, so I went into my old bedroom and dug out the dusty old binder we had put together all those years ago. We flipped it open, laughing at all the little details we'd forgotten, like Niall's declaration of the trip being our "Promised Land."

"Ya know, I want to stay in that cave hotel room," Niall said thoughtfully.

"Niall! That's $800 a night! There's no way we can afford that. Unless you want me to get a second job as a stripper or something." The idea was so ludicrous that we both laughed until our guts hurt. "Can you imagine? Some guy would be yelling 'take it off' and I'd probably punch his lights out."

"Not to mention the fact that I don't want anyone else to see me girl that way," Niall said, his voice suddenly soft and nostalgic.

"Never," I agreed.

"So maybe we can just see the cave hotel," Niall suggested. "They give tours, right?"

"I think so," I answered. "But I'll have to double check."

"That's kind of like my Everest, though." he laughed. "Some day, when we can afford it, we'll stay overnight. If I can spend a night that far under the earth with no sound, no light, no breeze, I can do anything."

"Yeah, but with our luck, you'd have a panic attack and have to be rushed to the nearest hospital," I reminded him.

"Y'er probably right," he laughed. "I hate to feel closed in like dat."

"Then why on earth do you want to do it?!" I shouted.

"To prove to myself that I can," he shrugged.

I shook my head and said, "I love you but I'll never understand you."

"You know what, Meg?" He said tenderly, brushing that ever-irritating strand of hair from my forehead.

"You're my Promised Land."

September 15 arrived like a nightmare I'd been trying I'd wake up from. Niall and I had been "together" for three years, but we'd really been together for ten years and it felt like he'd been by my side for my entire life.

His parents had driven him out to California for orientation earlier in the summer but I couldn't go with them because I had to work. Besides, they were trying to work things out, so it didn't seem right for me to tag along when they could have some alone time while Niall was checking out the school.

Now he was flying to California from Louisville. His parents, my parents and I all went with him to the airport. We couldn't escort him to the gate thanks to the stupid TSA rules, but I walked to the security line with him while our parents held back, having already said their goodbyes.

Tears were already running down my face.

"Oh, Meg," he hushed, pulling me tightly against him. He cradled my head with one hand, the other firmly around my back, and  he placed a gentle kiss to my temple. "We'll be all right. I promise. I'll be back at Thanksgiving and then Christmas. And in the winter, you'll come out and visit. It will go by fast."

"For you, it will. You'll be learning and working and meeting new people. For me, it will be horrible because I'll have to face all the places and things we did together without you."

That was it. He was choking up, too. That wasn't my intention, but I knew he hated leaving me. This just sucked.

He sniffled and said, "I know, Meg. But just remember that, every time you have a memory like that, in my heart, I'm right there with you."

"Sir, you're next," said one of the security agents.

"Give us a sec," he requested and let several people go ahead of him.

He pulled away from me enough to take my face in his hands one last time and he gave me a phenomenal farewell kiss. While it was happening, I held on to every single thought, feeling and sensation, storing them away for the days ahead.

"I gotta go," whispered, tears now glistening in his eyes. "Call ya when I get there."

"I love you," I told him.

"I love you," he said.

Once he was through security, there was no coming back. I watched til he disappeared from sight and I cried all the way home. I think we all did.

* * * * *

Gah! I cried so much while writing this!!!