I'm back! Kind of! Soon! I'm sorry, you guys, I know that I've been gone for like two months and like have been very vague, but I'm here now to give you a complete run down of exactly what's going to happen until the beginning of June, which is when I'm going to be returning in full, so just stay tuned and everything will make sense, okay? I'm also going to be giving some explanations to why I've been gone, because while no one cares, I think you'll be more sympathetic to my case once you hear me out.

First off, I'm not gonna be on until I see Endgame. Unfortunately, I'm not seeing it the first day it comes out. Or the second day. I might not see it until a week after and, frankly, I won't be giving any spoilers until it comes out on DVD, because I refuse to cause anyone any problems, and I won't even put it on my message board if I've seen it, because last time someone I followed did, someone posted spoilers as a response, and I refuse to let that happen, because that wasn't okay.

So, in terms of Endgame, I won't be back until I see it. In fact, while I might be updating stories, it's safe to say that I won't be returning to be active on this site until two weeks after Endgame comes out, which will be May 10 at the very least, I might actually push it until the Monday after, so May 13.

But then it's crunch time, because then I'm prepping for finals and graduation, because, if we didn't already know, I'm graduating this year and will be pursuing TV Writing & Production in the fall. If I graduate. Because, and none of you know this, I've been failing these past two semesters. I barely made it through Christmas, because I had the worst experience ever in the fall of 2018 and it's a surprise that I made it this far, but I am still heavily struggling, so I've been dead set on just trying to survive and make it through.

I did make an announcement around the time that I stopped being active on here that I was diagnosed with ADHD and, now, I am taking medication for it, but when I started, I changed. Now, don't get me wrong, I wouldn't give it up for anything because things got way better for me. I can't attribute it all to my medication, some of it is also me now being in a more positive, healthy environment, at least at school, so my overall disposition and level of personal value has increased. Like, I'm putting in effort and people around me are also noticing the changes I've been putting into caring more about myself; that being I'm finally learning how to wear makeup, something I've always wanted to do, but never had the drive to due to the lack of any real care.

But, dudes, I want to go to school now. That's kind of why I've stopped writing, because most of my time is being taken up by my focus in other interests I have—dressing nice and wearing makeup—as well as spending time with my friends. I had been AWOL the entire month of March because every weekend I was doing something, and I had fun, and I felt a little guilty because I was gone, but if I'm being honest, I didn't feel that bad. Of course, I wished that I had gotten my work done, but the time I could've been writing was spent being around people I love being around, and, honestly, I'd rather be happy in real life and not on here than being sad in real life, but writing, and I hope you can understand and respect that.

But I am coming back. Truth be told, I've missed writing, and this vacation I'm on right now sparked something in me and now I'm back. I can't explain what happened, but it's like a flip switched and while I'm not regressing by any means, I'm starting to find a balance between everything and I'm still working on it, but it seems that it's getting there. Of course, time management is a thing, but I'm now more set on actually working to find some time to put into writing again.

So what's gonna happen is I'm gonna try to write, but I won't make any promises. I promise, however, I will officially be back in time for my three year anniversary on June 2nd, and with that, I'll get back into writing.

In terms of my stories, here's what's going to go down:

I'm gonna be doing some cleanup before I'm officially back, but I won't be unpublishing any Hero of Heroes fics, just because I know once I do it'll be damn near impossible for them to come back, but I will be unpublishing all the written chapters of Standstill so I can revamp them to be better, but the story itself will still be up, you just can't read anything, but it'll still be there.

As previously mentioned, the Hero of Heroes will just be written as if I didn't have a due date. I am disappointed in myself that I didn't make it in time for Endgame, but I'm also not devastated, I don't hate myself like I was starting to back in January. In fact, I've made peace with it, and I think that's amazing. So what's gonna happen is that I'm just gonna write as standard, adding on fics along the way for characters that appeared in movies prior to Endgame, and then once those stories are finished, I will write into Infinity War/Endgame like I talked about before.

HOWEVER! That doesn't mean that I'm not gonna be publishing new fics, because this is me we're talking about, who do you think I am? In addition to the Captain Marvel & Co. fics I have in the works, I will be publishing at least two new stories.

One will be Significant Figures, the sequel to Lonely Hearts, which will come out when Spider-Man: Far From Home drops, and I'm incredibly anxious for that movie. I'm trying to disassociate from Endgame and so far it's been working, but when I think of Far From Home, I feel like I'm gonna throw up.

The second, which will come out on the three year anniversary of the initial story's release, is Dexter. Rewritten. I know I have way too many stories and shouldn't rewrite it, but I did say I would and I think it would be symbolic, especially if I wind up finishing it before I go to college, that would be really symbolic for me, so that's the plan for the summer at the very least.

So I've made peace, you guys. On this site, I've made myself my own timeline where I don't adhere to the timeline of life. Just like the movies, it's okay if I take two years to put out movies that happen within months of each other (a la Homecoming and Black Panther to Civil War) because the important thing is that it gets finished and is good, and that's all I want. And I want to have fun writing again, I miss enjoying it. It got to the point where it was a chore and almost like a punishment, and that's not fun.

I have, of course, become the person who needs to force herself to write, and that's not fun either, but honestly? I think I needed the long break. Like honestly, I thought I was being lazy, but in reality not only was I just not able to focus because of ADHD, but also because I had burned myself out beyond repair. A lot of things changed in the new year and it was actually a really awful start of the year, and once I lost my ability to write, it was as if nothing good could happen.

But then good did happen. It's not perfect and in fact it's still pretty bad, but it's getting better, and I'm getting better, and now I'm coming back, and, really, it just took some time, and I know I'm a big proponent of "there's not enough time, time is too short, never stop," but sometimes you actually just do need to stop. I needed this break.

But I'm back now. Or soon, rather. But it's good to be back, you guys, and I hope you're okay that I'm coming back. I've missed you, and I hope you missed me.