PAST

"I'm alive," Helic joked into the phone, moving his backside onto the stair railing as he playfully scouted down the long staircase of his dorm.

"This isn't funny," you chimed out, pouting a little, "I've tried calling all night but all you seem to do is ignore every attempt."

"Now, now sis," Helic popped, moving his hands around the phone by his ear as he moved through the quiet kitchen, "I don't ignore your attempts, I'm just oblivious to them. There's a difference."

Moving to having his soft fingers move over a red apple, the boy bit into the fruit before jumping successfully onto the kitchen island. Back slightly slouched and hoodie framing the side of his face as he lightly spoke to you, it was so natural and light of a conversation.

"It's like you don't miss me," you sighed out.

"'Cause I don't," he joked.

"Helic!"

He laughed, biting into his apple as he listened to you ramble and scold him more for being so neglecting.

"I really am sorry," Helic said lightly, "It just feels so nice to be free from everything you know? I don't have to worry about much over here...apart from school."

"No Dad," you mumbled out, knowing exactly how freeing Helic was probably feeling, "I understand why you'd want to stay away from any sort of communication."

"Thank you," he piped out, teeth out as he chewed more onto the fruit, "now you understand why I stay away from your calls too. Although it hurts me to do so."

You pouted further, and it was probably heard from the phone when Helic laughed again. "I swear when you get back I'm going to beat your ass."

"Dad might do that for you," Helic darkly joked.

Your heart sank a little at that. "Not funny," you stated, hearing him chewing on the other end.

"N'aww come on sis, laugh a little, and besides, you weren't the one constantly getting backslapped for no reason. I'm allowed to joke about this as a coping mechanism," Helic piped, staring over at the hallway where he heard soft footsteps nearing. He grinned hugely when spotting the woman move towards the fridge of the kitchen. Nothing but his shirt cascaded over the woman's naked form.

"I miss you," you stubbornly let out, feeling like a child ready to push out a tantrum.

"I miss you too," Helic sighed out, his voice a little drained now, "...just know that no matter what I'll always love ya alright?"

Your brows furrowed a little at the slight change with the man's tone of voice. Before you could question the change or re-evaluate how quickly it had occurred, you ranged distracted the moment you heard a playful 'hello' in the distance. Grinning, you tried to hold in your grin as you told Helic to return the greetings. "Helic, tell Tajh I said hi."

Helic grinned before slowly having his free hand wrap around his girlfriend's hips. Bringing her tiny form towards him, she stood between his toned thighs as he remained on the kitchen's island.

"Put her on speaker."

Helic rolled at his eyes when Tajh grew excited herself. Allowing the two of you talk, he simply allowed himself to focus on the mere natural enthusiasm strike Tajh's face.

"How are you?" Tajh piped, trying to refrain herself from stealing the phone away from Helic so she could talk and catch up with you.

"Forget about me! How are you? I was surprised you went all the way to London to visit Helic," you giggled out, not knowing why the girl's voice seemed to give you reassurance.

Tajh smiled at that, staring over at Helic who seemed to have his form grow more serious. Brows furrowing a little over at the serious and worried expression her boyfriend seemed to have, Tajh allowed her hands to softly touch the man. Stroking at his cheek to his hair, to down his neck, she smiled when he forced a smile in her direction. What's up with him?

"Yeah, well he said he missed me and I had to come out," Tajh said, focusing on the phone again, "Plus he's been planning to take me to some meditation area he normally visits. I'm excited for that."

Helic licked his lip at that. Forcing an even bigger smile on his face as Tajh leaned in to quickly peck his lips, the serious male gulped down the lump in his throat as he watched you question Tajh more over the phone.

"Meditation?"

"Yeah," Tajh said, smiling before lightly pecking at Helic's lips again. Her eyes were soft and genuine while staring over at the boy she was in love with. Lightly cupping at his face, she playfully pinched at his cheeks to get his face to open a little. For some reason, he went way too serious incredibly quick.

"Sounds like so much fun," you whined, wishing you were anywhere but in the walls of your lecture hall that hadn't begun yet. "Where exactly is it?"

"Some mountainous area," Helic mumbled out, wanting the subject of topic to end already. "I haven't told Tajh everything about the trip yet so she's overly excited. I'm debating on if I should allow her to come or not."

Tajh grinned, oblivious when it came to noticing the sad look in Helic's eyes. "Now why would you leave me here?" she teased, moving to hug at the man's shoulders before letting her nose brush his.

"For your safety," he said, pursing his lips into a loose smile, there was something dark and hidden to the smile however, "wouldn't want the car to topple over the sides with you in it."

Tajh's brows furrowed at the forced laugh. There was sudden silence over the phone as well.

"Don't joke like that," you whispered out. One minute you were cringing over the phone from hearing the two of them make-out, now the next minute you were suddenly overwhelmed and worried for the both.

"I've got a dark sense of humour," Helic piped out, sweeping his head over to sloppily kiss Tajh's neck. It was a way to suddenly distract his girlfriend that seemed to be sprung with millions of questions, and it happened to work the closer he got to her collarbone.

You took the phone away from your ear and had your nose crinkle in slight disgust when hearing Tajh's breath hitch. Mouthing an 'ew', you mumbled into the phone.

"Yikes, at least wait for me to hang up before trying to make babies."

-

PRESENT

"She's making babies, she's making babies!" you yelled to yourself, covering the phone you held in your hand as you wanted to scream in shock to yourself. Not knowing if you should be laughing, smiling, or cussing into the phone, you remained completely and utterly overwhelmed.

Here you were, waiting after many rings passed in the comfort of your bedroom. You waited for the phone to be picked up and when it finally was picked up by the woman you wanted to rant to, she was incredibly uncomfortable and in a rush. It all clicked when you heard changing of patterns in her breath, and her voice seemed to squeak.

That's when you grew shocked and almost tossed your phone away in fright. Were you scared? Were you happy and excited? You had no idea now. As of right now, you were just caught off guard. Here you were trying to rant about how Jungkook keeps stealing clothing from your home every night he comes to stay over, only to hear mediocre ear porn.

"I'll call you later Lia!" you chimed excitedly, nervously laughing as you shut the phone.

Your eyes were wide however, completely awake.

-

Jungkook's eyes were practically closed, just about to find sleep while walking.

The maknae's back hurt. He was in slight pain from all the nights he spent stubborn on your couch. Even when you asked for him to grab a spot on your parent or brother's bed, Jungkook had refused. He didn't want to be disrespectful in your household in any means. Was it to impress you? Hell no, he found an irritation almost playful when talking to you everyday. Was it to somewhat impress your father? Maybe. Jungkook thought about that a lot. He didn't know why but a part of him didn't enjoy the fact that he your father wasn't fond of him. Why Jungkook felt the need to be on your father's good side? He had no idea.

It all just felt right. The efforts and the back pain he got everyday. It felt well deserved, kind of like the feeling a dancer feels after a long day of practice. There's a feeling of contentment when it comes to feeling your legs numb and shaking when knowing you've worked hard for your state. It's an all new type of high.

Eyes tired, Jungkook rubbed at his neck before staring over at the clocks lining the sides of the hallway as he walked. In the BigHit building, he knew he was early. He knew for a fact since not many staff seemed to be walking about. Smiling and bowing over at the ones that did seem to walk by, Jungkook had trouble in bending.

Sighing irritably, the maknae swallowed up his complaints as he went to greet Lia. Lia, the stylist noona that Jungkook liked for months now. The one he always had his mind believe was the one crush that seemed to catch his eyes. Normally, he could care less about women, he was like Yoongi with that fact...but Lia was different. She is right?

Hands moving over to the knob of the door that lead to her office area, Jungkook was way too tired to realize his disrespect as he didn't knock. He normally always did, yet this day he didn't. He opened at the door and walked right in. But the moment he did, so much attacked his eyes in an instant.

Big eyes growing bigger, Jungkook was confused and instantly quiet from the shock. He stood there, a seagull caught in headlights (lol what? I need sleep) as he stared over at the two that jumped away from each other.

The man's lips were marking the woman's neck, her legs wrapped around the man's hips. Both were clothed but barely stable as the man practically toppled over and fell over a chair from the sudden entry of Jungkook.

It was Lia and Jin.

"Hyung?" Jungkook popped out, eyes still wide.

The maknae watched as the two were flustered. Lia was straightening out her dress and messy locks of hair, while Jin was buttoning up the top of his dress shirt. Not much was shown or seen, but Jungkook noticed one thing. One thing that spoke numbers to him, something the maknae still couldn't find control over.

Jin's boner.

Jungkook was no longer shocked, he was just awkwardly staring over at Jin's penis that seemed to be angrily staring directly at him through his hyung's jeans. The maknae wasn't shocked, nor did his heart sink at all when seeing Jin and Lia together. It was weird, normally, a few months ago maybe he would have been disappointed if he were to walk in on this. But today, as of right now, the maknae didn't feel upset at all. If anything, he found it weirdly amusing when seeing Lia's voice squeak over at him as if acting he hadn't just seen what he saw. The maknae's amusement grew when hearing how fast Jin's voice turned into one of Jimin's high notes when he spoke to him.

"Ahh, Jungkook-ah! W-When'd you—"

"I'm going to slowly back out now," Jungkook said, soft amused smile coming onto his face when spotting Jin trying to recover, "I'll pretend I didn't just walk in on something BangPD will be upset about."

With that, the maknae turned around, trying not to laugh when hearing Jin's voice crack as he followed him out. Moving through the hallway, Jungkook was suddenly awake when meeting Jin's eyes. The older hyung seemed to catch up to Jungkook insanely fast.

"Ah, hello hyung! I haven't seen you all morning!" Jungkook chimed out, moving to slap playfully over at Jin's arm. The maknae held the same smile however.

If anything, Jungkook was more glad over that fact that he wasn't saddened one bit over seeing what he says. There was something within him that screamed relief when he walked in, as if an answer was given to his delusional form. I don't like Lia anymore. That's great, that's good. I can stop pretending I'm stuck around this crush and just focus on work.

Jungkook felt liberated...freed from a lie his body and mind were feeding his heart.

"Jungkook-ah, what you saw—"

"What I see?" Jungkook piped, pretending to act oblivious as the maknae winked.

Jin's brows furrowed a little.

Jungkook smiled a little more sweetly now.

"Hyung, you once told me you'd be here for me no matter what. In the car, you gave me this thoughtful lecture about how I could trust you," Jungkook said sincerely, "...it goes both ways. I'm here for you too, and you can trust me as well. We might be many years a part and it may get awkward sometimes...I'm always here."

Jin was taken slightly aback from what was coming out of the normally closed off maknae. Jungkook never spoke so freely about certain aspects before. Drawing a blank, the hyung almost bumped into a turning corner of a hall again as he focused on the grinning 97' line again.

"I'll keep this secret with me until you tell me its okay to talk about," Jungkook finished off, his hand no longer playfully slapping over at a still flustered Jin. His hand was now resting on his hyung's shoulder.

"Since when were you such a smart speaker?" Jin asked, slightly teasing to make it less of an awkward situation.

Jungkook grinned, smiling before moving his shoulder to nudge over at his hyung's. "I learn from the best no? Got 6 brothers teachin' me."

Jin smiled a little too much at that as he moved to hug the maknae. Jungkook flinched away quickly though, glancing down over at the bulge that was softer than before in Jin's pants.

Jin's eyes widened, forgetting about his situation for a moment as he awkwardly laughed and jumped a bit. Closing his eyes, the older boy thought of a few things, begging and trying not to throw up at his thoughts. Eventually, almost in a matter of seconds, Jin's pants were back to normal. No bulge, no worries. Suddenly, so quickly, at normal.

Jungkook was in awe. Head snapping to Jin's face, Jungkook wanted to ask. Oh, hyung, teach me your ways! But no, the maknae refrained from asking anything. The look of shock was seen in the maknae's face however, it was obvious.

"I apologize for you seeing that," Jin spoke out, awkwardly smiling.

"H-How do you, um..." Jungkook swallowed, he the one who was awkward now.

As if roles were reversed, Jin was the one amused now.

"How do I what?"

"I've been..." Jungkook swallowed, both of them moving towards the elevators now, "I've been experiencing development near the groin region and it really confuses me I—"

Jin busted out laughing. Firstly because of how the maknae chose to words such an ordeal, and now secondly because of why Jungkook seemed so uncomfortable.

"Looks like our little maknae's growing up," Jin piped, rolling his eyes when Jungkook seemed to blush a little.

Chuckling, Jin made it a conversation to speak about later when neither were so awkward. Ruffling at the boy's hair, Jin practically dragged Jungkook into the elevator.

-

Yoongi dragged you away from the car that was still roaring from the driver having it on. Trying to balance your unstable self, Yoongi grinned when you poked at his cheek. Piping out a "boop" as you stumbled forward and towards the house, the man seemed to laugh, trying his hardest to hold you together.

Night had fallen quick. From one end, there was the entire day spent with the three Bangtan members you hadn't talked to in a while. Although they tried to bring you out of the sad mindset of your brother's death, they all were supportive nonetheless. Incredibly supportive for men who just found out about the tragic two beers in... yikes.

But here you were now, all of them sweetly dropping you home. Hoseok and Jimin were about to play rock, paper, and scissors to see who had to take you up with Yoongi. But it was a surprise to the both when Yoongi told them to stay out.

"I've got this on my own," Yoongi had said.

Confusing the two at first, neither questioned it as they were both just happy to not be the ones carrying your weight inside.

"Hurry, we've got to get back to the dorms. Plus, I'm sure Y/N will be fine. Jungkook's coming in a bit."

Yoongi didn't say anything, nor was he paying attention to any of what the others were saying. His eyes were on you as he found his slightly tipsy self amused and laughing over how piss drunk you seemed to be.

Everything in this state you found cute. Even a piece of chewed up bubble gum on the dirty sidewalk was the most adorable thing to you. Nothing could top the gum, nothing until you started to poke more at Yoongi's cheek when entering the home. That's when you called him "the cutest of all".

Yoongi chuckled, rolling his eyes as he closed the door behind him and focused on simply getting you to bed. Moving up the stairs, he struggled a few times. Almost falling on top of each other, he had a good grip on your waist as you worked your way up.

"You're so sweet to me," you piped out, face dangerously close to his side.

It made Yoongi a little uncomfortable.

"I wasn't always," he mumbled out, trying not to let the heat from your breath cause any affect on him.

"But I understood why," you cutely mumbled out, it surprised the both of you that you didn't burp straight in his face. "I deceived the whole group. I understand why I was discriminated against."

"We barely treated you like a human," Yoongi softly let out, helping you reach the very top where he propped himself up with you.

Moving one of your arms around his shoulder, the both of you walked and walked. It seemed like forever.

You slurring, him trying not to focus on how weird his stomach felt around you. Heck, all of this was weird. Everything about these past couple of months had been weird and out of the blue for Yoongi.

New experiences...new feelings.

"I know, I'm still mad over that," you playfully shot out, moving to peck his cheek aggressively before arching your head away so you could look at his face.

Yoongi swallowed hard at the action. Forcing a smile on your face, the man simply changed any sort of subject as he directed it towards sleep. Thinking if he talked about sleep, maybe you'd get sleepier. Hey, it's a long shot but worth a try.

You giggled, almost tripping by the threshold that opened an entrance of your bedroom down the hall. All this happening as Yoongi spoke about the latest he had slept for.

"You know what's interesting? I—" the rest you couldn't understand from the man as your alcoholic driven mind came to take place.

"Hmmmm," you mumbled out, pretending your drunk self was listening to every word coming out of the man's mouth.

-

"Hm?" Hoseok piped, half asleep himself. He was pretending to hear every rant-filled words that seemed to be coming out of such a small body in the back.

"We shouldn't have let her drink," Jimin mumbled from the car, completely sober. "I adore Y/N and all but l couldn't stand this night."

"Hm."

Hoseok was about to fall asleep, yet he kept the illusion that Jew as still listening to every word being spoken.

"Here I was trying to get Yoongi out to party and drink so I could finally figure out who this person he likes is," Jimin mumbled, his little thumbs pushing a little too hard onto the touchscreen keypad of his phone, "but nooo, we had to take Y/N along."

"Hm."

"Although I'm glad minds were off Y/N's brother, but, Jungkook makes sure of that every night," Jimin sighed, knowing he was frustrated for no reason. "Why have the three of us if Jungkook's got it covered, right?"

"Hm."

Jimin looked away from his phone. Glancing over at the driver of the car that was already taking a little sweet nap, waiting for Yoongi's return, Hoseok seemed to have his eyes drift as well.

"Are you ever listening to me?!" Jimin sang out, pouting a little when seeing that he was mumbling away to himself.

"Hm."

Jimin sighed, about to slump back into his chair area in defeat, he jumped when their was a form about to knock into the window of the car.

"Ahh," Jimin mumbled irritated, ready to chuck his phone out towards the one that had terrified him a second ago, "Jungkook-ah! You scared me."

"What you doing here?" Jungkook asked, confused over why Jimin, Hoseok, and Yoongi had called off on break today while the others met up.

It wasn't a serious meet-up and Jungkook knew some of the members needed a break because of the recent stresses. It was just a huge confusion to see a car parked in front of your house out of all places.

"The three of us and Y/N took a day off to spend together. They all got a little drunk," Jimin piped out, glancing over at Hoseok who was sound asleep now.

Jungkook looked at Hoseok and then back at Jimin. "Where's Yoongi hyung?" Jungkook asked, slightly curious.

There was a lot internally however, worried for your safety and the fact that you had drank. Internally, he didn't understand the urge he had to not see you so incredibly piss drunk...Jungkook was worried, and it was visible on his face.

"He's inside, been helping get Y/N in safely."

Jungkook nodded instantly at that. Without another word or goodbye, the maknae turned his focus away from the car window with an awestruck Jimin. Moving with a slight job towards the door, Jimin's eyes narrowed at what he just observed.

What was that about?

-

"What was that about?" You asked, not wanting to let go of Yoongi as he tried to have your butt sit onto your bed.

Instead, you held onto him, laughing and practically screaming into his ear as he failed to move you onto the bed. Hearing him sigh in defeat, that's when you were grinning and laughing to yourself even further.

"I felt sorry."

"So, you kissed me on the cheek?" You piped, eyes narrowing however smile huge. "That's so sweet. I never knew you had such a sweet side. You're swag man...you're not like this with girls."

You rambled on and on. At one point, you mentioned the suing and reporting of him that his biggest fan was about to do. He laughed a little at that, watching how passionately you spoke about him, his rapping, and his personality.

Smiling sweetly as he watched you stand in front of him, at this point, he didn't mind the fact that you were so dangerously close to him.

Sure, you were slurring and have alcohol breath, overall, none of it changed how beautiful you were in his eyes. Drunk or not...

"Was I your bias?" Yoongi asked curiously, genuinely wanting to know as he lightly had his hand hover lightly by your hips now, "...you know, back when you thought of yourself as a fan."

You giggled, shushing him. When you did, you moved your fingers onto his lips. He seemed to awkwardly laugh, trying to move his head away from his. Pouting you simply hugged him, head on his shoulder.

"You're such a cute little baby?"

"Little baby?" Yoongi asked, chuckling as he tried not to let the fact that you were pressed against him get to him.

You nodded and it went quiet.

Yoongi swallowed hard, his face by your shoulder. He had trouble voicing anything out, so instead, he didn't. He didn't say a word.

Yoongi just stood there, slowly allowing him to hug your form. He was okay with this, this feeling. These feelings he never thought he'd ever get so soon in his career.

"Who was your bias?"

-

"Who was your bias?"

Jungkook froze a little by the entrance of the door. As he was causally about to walk in and see if Yoongi needed assistance, the maknae stopped when realizing the door was already slightly open. His eyes took him by surprise when spotting you in Yoongi's arms. There was a slight sinking of his stomach the moment he caught glimpse of the embrace.

The maknae looked away. He looked away so fast and towards the little cracks of the floors by the beginning of the carpet in your room.

This is the feeling...this was the saddening disappointment Jungkook was waiting for when spotting Lia with Jin. But he didn't get it then. Instead, he got it now. A simple drunk hug seemed to make him feel all types of low, while Lia making out with his other hyung amused him. Why was that?

"It used to be Jungkook," you cutely let out, face practically buried and drooling into Yoongi's side.

Jungkook swallowed at that, a small smile came onto his face at that. The stomach that was once sinking seemed to rise float again. He had butterflies.

"If I were still a fan he'd probably be my bias still," you sighed out, moving away from Yoongi like a child as you drunkenly sat onto your bed.

Curling up into your pillow, you wanted sleep to take over as you focused on nothing else but the feeling of how soft everything felt below your warm cheek.

Sleep found you slowly. You were drowsy and remained in your own world, while the two worlds around you discovered new possibilities and secrets.

Jungkook pursed his lips from smiling too large. Not realizing he was eavesdropping, Jungkook was about to walk in with the largest smile but suddenly stopped again with what Yoongi seemed to say next.

This caught the maknae off guard, sudden confusion and thoughts clouding the dark-haired boy as his eyes went through a daze all over again.

"That's too bad," Yoongi let out lowly, there was a little bit of disappointment in his voice, "...'cause I bias—well like, you."

Jungkook was frozen, his lips ajar.

Yoongi sighed, oblivious as he picked himself up from his little confession there and focused on leaving without stresses.

The older man seemed to stop in his tracks however, eyes widening when seeing Jungkook wide eyed and putting all the pieces together.

Yoongi felt sick to his stomach when seeing the change in the maknae's eyes.

Jungkook started slow, his voice hesitant. "So, when Jimin told everyone about this mystery person you like..."

Jungkook trailed off, his eyes moving to awkwardly meet you sleeping.

Yoongi swallowed, jaw clenching a bit.

"It's not as big of a deal as Jimin makes it to be," Yoongi defended, slowly moving his eyes to match where Jungkook was staring.

"It is a big deal hyung," Jungkook breathily let out, "it's a huge deal to me."

Yoongi's brows furrowed at that.

Jungkook felt his stomach drop. It dropped so low and so far within his body that he had the urge to spill out everything he ate his whole life.

There was no going back after this one for Jungkook...a sunken ship is what all his insides became.