I didn't go to school on Wednesday nor Thursday. I kept calling Wilder diligently any time that I could, leaving him slews of messages that he never replied to. With each ring of the phone, my stomach knotted tighter and tighter.

I decided to go to school on Friday, and everything was- in the words of William Shakespeare- weird as fuck.

Right from the moment I entered, I could hear whispers and talks. I felt strange anxiety clawing in my stomach as if a vagabond animal yearning to escape. After the glue incident and the fight with Matt, I was now in the spotlight for way longer than I wanted to. The moment I reached my locker in the morning, I was apprehended by Cam and Ray.

"Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?" Cam asked as I turned warily to him. "Why are you freezing us out like this?"

"Nico, that entire fight-" Ray shook her head, biting her lip. "Why won't you let us help?"

I sighed, feeling suddenly guilty. I knew my behaviour towards them had been unwarranted. I vaguely wondered if they had seen my article about third-wheeling but decided against asking them.

"I've...just been kinda messed," I shook my head. "I'm...sorry."

They exchanged surprised glances before Cam's face softened. "We're glad you look alright."

He messed up my hair and I punched him playfully against his shoulder. Thankfully, the cut near my jaw and most of my body had healed for the maximum part, leaving me with a dull throbbing ache in my body.

"What did Matt do to piss you off?" Ray asked as we made our way to class that day. She shook her head, her eyes deadly serious. "Not that anyone is surprised about his suspension mind you. They just know that you had some fight and....well..." she shuddered. "It's been....quite the news."

My stomach jolted slightly. What kinda news had it been? I realized I didn't want to know. I gritted my teeth at the memory of him. I didn't want to let them know some secret that wasn't mine to tell so I decided to be as vague as possible. "It's...something to do with Kailey."

I increased my pace, aware of them exchanging glances with each other. I was thankful however that they didn't pester. "Nic," Cam said as I turned to face him. "If you're free today, I'm thinking we should go out. There's this great new restaurant that opened," he grinned. "It has a Sherlock Holmes theme. We thought you might like it."

I gazed at him for a while and found myself mildly intrigued by the idea. "Sure. Sounds good."

He nodded and gently squeezed my shoulder. "After classes, yeah?" I nodded at him as he and Ray left for their history lesson and I made my way to my biology one. More whispers followed me when I entered the classroom and I felt my neck heating up in embarrassment. However, I decided to simply keep my head low and quickly made my way towards the last bench, careful not to tangle my own legs with each other.

I sat at the far end, fishing out my phone and decided to text Wilder again. I didn't know how sincere he was when it came to classes and whether he would even check his phone during one, but I was going to try.

Our teacher walked in after a while and I lowered the phone further, making sure it was hidden from his line of sight under the desk as he started droning on. It was something about the DNA.

I unlocked my phone which was thankfully on silent mode and gazed in shock at the slew of notifications incoming so rapidly that I was afraid my phone would crash and shut down. I opened the notifications to see that the blog now had ten thousand hits. I gaped at it, my heart beating somewhere near my throat. Below the article was a number of comments from stranger profiles that I was sure weren't from our school.

Addison Bailey: I experienced something similar in my junior year. It's kind of comforting to know there are others where I am.

Ray Rockford: Apart from the fact that it was relatable as fuck, I really like the way the author wrote, it was hilarious but also sad.

Mitchell Myers: I'm crying because this looks like the toxic friendship I chewed my way out of a while back.

I gaped at the last comment. A toxic friendship? No way. Cam and Ray were just different than me. They always did try to be supportive, but the thing remained that we liked different things. Plus, I had a habit of socially secluding myself so I wouldn't blame them if they'd decided to do something on their own and plan some events without me.

"Evans? Are you operating your phone?"

Fuck.

I cursed under my breath and quickly slid the phone inside the desk, gazing up at Mister Greenwood with what I hoped was an innocent expression. His dark eyes were narrowed suspiciously, his tuft of rusty red hair bouncing on his forehead as he glared down at me. 

"You would perhaps like to tell us what is the difference between heterochromatin and euchromatin?"

I almost giggled at how triumphant he looked as if he had backed me into a corner. However, I had loved biology since time immemorial, meaning I had read through chapters just for fun. Something that had convinced Kailey that I was an undiagnosed psychopath.

"Heterochromatin is tightly packed DNA that can be stained and euchromatin is loosely packed DNA that can't be stained under general conditions," I answered promptly, still trying to look apologetic.

His eyes flashed, his nostrils flaring before he sighed, "That is correct, however, I request you to pay attention in class."

I nodded and made a mental note to be more careful as he walked away. After making sure that I was well versed in whatever he was teaching now (Chromosomal disorders) I decided to continue trying to wrest a response from Wilder. I gazed at the multiple texts I had dropped to him, a long sequence of them and felt my heart sinking. What had gone wrong suddenly? I took a shuddering breath, biting my lip as I tried another time.

Nico: did I do something wrong

I knew maybe I was overthinking. Maybe I was being overdramatic. But I couldn't fathom the thought of losing him again. I decided to approach him physically as a last resort. I was made fun of anyway, might as well get some work done out of it. 

I reached the football ground after classes in the afternoon where practices were in full swing. I dropped a text to Cam telling him I'll meet him in a little while.

My heart somersaulted when I saw Wilder sprinting across the grounds from one side to another, his skin glistened with sweat as the sun beat down on him. He panted slightly from his run, his eyes, however, remained focussed ahead. I held my breath for a while, marvelling at his gorgeousness. I hoped he would look at me and know I wanted to talk to him instead of me waving like a moron as I had previously done.

He spoke something to the coach, a tall, burly man with a cap, and started jogging towards the other end of the field. Taking the opportunity I ran to catch up after him.

He leaned and picked up his black backpack, fishing a water bottle out of it. He took a long drink, still panting when his eyes finally settled on me. I thought I imagined them softening for a while before an unexplained shadow passed behind them. As if the blue embers that held me so transfixed were doused.

"Nico," he said softly, studying me when I finally caught up to him. "You look well."

I nodded, grabbing my side from the sudden run as I straightened up to look at him. Seeing his friendly enough demeanour I was almost sure that he hadn't seen the calls or texts and wasn't just freezing me out. I sighed softly in relief.

He tilted his head slightly to the side, an amused smirk on his face. "You know you are very entertaining when you're high."

I took in a sharp breath, racking my brains to try and grasp when had he ever seen me high. Fuck that, when had I ever been high?

"What?"

His eyebrows knitted together as if in confusion. "You know, at the hospital. You said all kinds of..." to my surprise, his cheeks reddened as he spluttered, "stuff."

"W-what hospital?"

He raked a hand through his hair. "I took you to the hospital to get you checked. Thankfully, they told me that you hadn't hurt your head. But that your body took quite a fall. So they drugged you. I...assume you don't remember."

His eyes glistened for just a split second before he blinked them back to normal. As he had talked, however, faint memories like wisps of smoke were swirling somewhere in the back of my head. I remembered the white tiles and overly bright lights.

Wilder had taken me to the hospital. Had he not told my mom? Why didn't she tell me?

"I dropped you off after that. And..." he sighed and bit his lower lip as if struggling with something. "Your mom...wasn't really happy with the fact that I had taken you alone."

"What?" I asked softly. I couldn't understand. Why would my mom lie to me about something like this? Is that why? Because she didn't like Wilder?

And why was I believing Wilder over her?

My heart seemed to beat faster in a silent, wordless answer.

"I...I missed you too," he whispered.

I gaped at him, unable to grasp the randomness of his words. His cheeks flushed for a second before he flashed me a soft smile. "You asked me if I only missed Arfie. That's not true. I missed you too. More."

My heart lept out of my chest. Trying to string coherent words together, I spoke with extraordinary coherence, "You're welcome. S-orry. I mean you too. I-"

He started laughing. His careless, open laughter that made his eyes twinkle. "Well, thank you."

I found myself staring at him, my heart palpitating frantically. If he had missed me, then why did he keep freezing me out like this? 

He stopped laughing after a while and sighed, waiting for me to speak.

"Er...Matt got suspended," I said, shuffling my feet nervously. 

He shrugged. "About time too."

I almost smiled at his words. "Did...you tell the authorities?"

He was quiet for a while. I didn't really think he had told on Matt, but somehow, his silence seemed like a confirmation. 

"I...I hit him first you know," I said softly, guilt burning my insides. "I...I lost it and kinda just...punched him."

His eyes widened almost comically. "What? Nugget punch?'

I laughed. "Well...I just...kinda lost control I suppose," I sighed. "What did you tell them? To get him suspended I mean."

"Well, they got an 'anonymous tip' that Matthew Browning grievously injured a certain Nicola Evans." He shrugged. "And then they got the confirmation for the news that you indeed had ended up at the hospital so...they did call your place to confirm. Although they decided to protect his identity."

My mom hadn't told me that the school had caller her either. Why was she hiding this stuff? Somehow I didn't want to ask her explicitly. I wanted her to tell me on her own. 

I gaped open-mouthed at him, my heart racing frantically. "Wilder that...I..." I stuttered. Going against Matt had never been healthy for anyone. If he got to know that it was Wilder who had told on him, which he probably would, I shuddered to think what he would try to do. "What if he tries...to come after you? You know he's a jerk."

Wilder shrugged. "I just know he couldn't have gone unpunished. I'll...take whatever he throws at me."

My heart felt warm at the thought somehow. Although, I was still worried Matt would come after him. But he was right, Wilder was way too high up in the social ladder for Matt to hurt him. After the suspension especially, he would be on thinner ice and I hoped he wouldn't want to push it much.

There was a loud yell from somewhere behind Wilder and I saw a guy from his team waving at him. Wilder turned and nodded at him before turning back to look at me. I decided to shoot my shot before he had to leave again. 

"Thanks for that day and...you weren't replying to my calls or texts so I thought-"

The twinkle in his eyes disappeared completely, replaced by chasmic darkness. "I've been a little busy."

My stomach clenched nervously. "Yeah...I know with the tournament and every-" I cursed under my breath when some of his teammates waved to him on their sprint, as if deliberately. He seemed to be chewing on his tongue so hard now that I was afraid he would draw blood. His jaw was clenched angrily and I stuttered, wondering if I should go on after all.

"I just...I mean you...are acting kind of strange. You didn't reply at all so I got-" I continued. 

He sighed deeply, raking a hand through his hair before he shrugged. "I just...I've been busy."

"I know. I don't mean-" I stuttered again. I could hear sniggering and turned to see a bunch of guys from his team staring at us. I cursed under my breath. Why couldn't they just leave him alone? I turned to face him again determinedly. "I was just....wondering if I maybe did something wrong because you're just acting all distant and weird again and I don't really know-"

His eyes looked dark. The characteristic glimmer that the sun would usually amplify seemed to be absent from his eyes. "No. I just didn't feel like it."

I gaped at him. "Huh?"

More sniggers followed and Wilder balled his fists. I was half afraid he would yell at me and took an involuntary step backwards. However, he sighed and spoke in a gentle voice, "I'll see you later, okay? Take care."

He hadn't raised his voice, but he sounded so strange that my fingers felt frozen. The sudden change of demeanour. The quick creation of this facade of his that always terrified me. I couldn't understand. 

"Wilder, wait-" I said, balling my fists as he slowly turned to face me again. I lowered my voice, "I..." My cheeks turned bright red and I whispered, "I can't stop thinking...about...the...you know..."

I needed an answer. I needed a clear sign. All the cat and mouse was confusing me more than advanced calculus. 

He walked closer to me, speaking in a low voice. "Don't tell anyone about the kiss alright? It shouldn't have happened and it isn't going to anymore."

"It...isn't?" I asked, forcing myself to look at him. 

His bit his lip, shutting his eyes as he took a deep breath. "I...I care about you, Nico. But...that's-"

"So you make out with all your friends then?" I asked, my heart hammering so loud I could hear it in my ears.

"You know I could just say yes and that would break down your entire argument, right?" he shook his head, smirking slightly. "I...I don't know."

"What are we, Wilder?" I asked softly, barely able to hear myself over the pounding of my heart.  

He shuffled his feet, fidgeting nervously. "Nothing," he answered. I felt like someone had reached into my chest and was twisting my heart painfully. If we were nothing, why had he kissed me like that? If I meant nothing to him, why had he held me like that? Why did my heart react this way around him? How could something so intense just be one-sided? Did he enjoy playing with my emotions?

He averted his gaze from mine, fixing it on the field instead. The air around us seemed to solidify suddenly.

"What...what did I do, Wilder?" I asked, my voice breaking. Maybe I sounded needy, maybe I sounded clingy, but my ego shattered in front of him. "I...did I offend you somehow?"

He raked a hand through his hair again and I gazed fascinated at the way the golden days of the sun streamed through his dark brown hair.

"Evans..." he sighed, another dark shadow passing across his features as he shuffled his feet and seemed to avert my gaze.

"Nico," I corrected, gritting my teeth. "Why do you call me Evans?"

I felt like this was his subconscious way to maintain distance with me. Or maybe it was conscious. Either way, it hurt more than I thought it would. 

He looked momentarily surprised as his eyes widened. "I...I-" he took a deep breath, when he spoke, his voice was gentle but firm. "Nico, just stop approaching me randomly like this, okay?"

I gaped at him as he turned and walked away without another word. My heart sank and settled somewhere near my stomach.

Of course, Wilder Collins had been a dream, and now, I was awake.