chapter one:

If you had asked me just a year ago, I would have told you that I was going to marry Santiago Lagos.

We first met in the fifth grade, shoulder partners at the same table. The first thing that he told me was that he was going to marry me one day. Back then, I didn't believe him and I told him right away that it would never happen. Somehow, he wooed me enough to the point where we started dating later that school year.

We kept it a secret though, for neither of our parents were fans of young relationships. We hid it from friends, in fear they would say something to our parents on accident. In fact, up until our eighth-grade year, nobody suspected that we were anything more than friends. I'm surprised they never caught on though.

If I was at his house working on homework, we would sneak kisses when his mother wasn't looking. It was harder at my house but we still managed to do what we could when we could.

When our friends and family finally found out we were dating, they were overjoyed. Seven years of a relationship meant that we spent a couple of weeks of winter and summer break together. I went from knowing two languages - Korean and English - to almost three fluently, the third being Spanish from the help of his mother.

He was my first time, I was his. We had our future all planned out. Three babies, a quarter Korean, a quarter black and half Hispanic, with my hair and his eyes. An open loft in the middle of Guatemala. We were going to marry two years after high school, once he had enough money and I had my first degree.

All of it planned out. He even had a promise ring that he gave the summer before we started freshman year.

Despite all of that, I still got cheated on.

And the worst part about it all was the whispers.

When it got out that the two of us had broken up, the rumors started. Santiago got the praises and the laughs for getting away with cheating for three years. I had to endure every piece of gossip. Every prying eye in the hallway. They blamed me for the breakup because of course, it had to something I did, or didn't do.

But as far as I knew, I had been the best girlfriend I could have been.

The girl he spent the last three years of our relationship cheating on me with was beautiful. Santiago always had a thing for foreign girls, anyone could tell you that. She was much darker than I was and her eyes were a sharp gray. A slanted nose and black hair that was down to her knees braided. She was the captain of the debate team, played tennis with a passion and had been an exchange student from India our freshman year, the same year they started talking.

We had crossed paths a couple times as I was in charge of the club pictures, but our interests never coincided so never did we.

I've been told by multiple sources that senior year was supposed to be the highlight of our high school years. Graduation is supposed to be the last hurrah that us seniors endured before we all found our paths in the world.

After the breakup- which took place right before Spring Break- I wanted to skip the rest of the year. I couldn't stand walking through the hallways anymore. I stopped giving people their traditional hugs when I saw them.

I dug the greys and blacks out of the back of my usually colorful closet, keeping the hoodie over my head so that I could avoid the stares. I even stopped going to the yearbook club and nobody forced me.

I had been in that school long enough to know how to get to my classes from every which way. So when I saw the two of them down the hallway, I could turn around and take a different way to class, even if it meant being late.

I would have skipped the rest of the year if I could have. Anything to avoid the looks I was getting, even if my spread out band of friends did what they could to make me feel better. I only stayed because my grades were already low and I couldn't afford to fail any classes or I wouldn't be able to graduate in the spring.

Now you see, while my friends did what they could, it was nothing compared to the efforts my parents put in.

The two were doctors so I was used to only one of them being home at a time, but they still did their best. The first couple of nights, my mother sang the same Korean lullabies that she sang when I was a child while I cried myself to sleep. My pops would throw down in the kitchen, making a combination of soul food and Korean food and we would watch my favorite movies in the living room.

It helped a lot and not going to lie, I put on some weight from my pops's cooking but it got my mind off of the incident in time for graduation. I was back to myself that weekend, especially since I got my acceptance letter into USC, one of the best photography schools in Cali.

But even a fresh set of goddess locs with the gold add on's that I loved, a fresh face of makeup, and a gift of new film could only do so much. How is it that when they called Santiago's name, all eyes turned towards me instead of him walking the stage?

I took that as the last straw by the way. After graduation and a small dinner between my parents, who had both taken the day off to be with me ( their only child ), I knew there needed to be a change.

I couldn't spend the summer trapped away in my bedroom, scared to go into the town out of fear of seeing either one of them. That night, I laid in bed, holding my phone above my head. It was getting late when I got the courage to send out the text but I figured I would have answers before I woke up the next morning.

𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘴

𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘰 𝘰𝘯 𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱?

𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘻𝘶

⤷ 𝘪'𝘮 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨?

𝘴𝘬𝘺𝘦𝘦𝘦𝘦

⤷ 𝘴𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘤. 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯?

𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘸𝘵𝘺 𝘢𝘥𝘢𝘭𝘺𝘯𝘦

⤷𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘩?

𝘭𝘪𝘭 𝘣𝘳𝘰 𝘵𝘢𝘫

⤷𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘳𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘰

𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘰𝘺

⤷𝘪'𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘨

𝘫𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰𝘯

⤷ 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘩. 𝘪'𝘮 𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘸

𝘣𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘣𝘦𝘢

⤷𝘪'𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘴𝘬 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘯

𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘺 𝘵𝘺

⤷ 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪'𝘮 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘢 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦

𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘰𝘩

⤷ 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘮. 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯?

𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘪𝘪𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢

⤷ 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘵𝘦?

𝘦𝘮𝘴

⤷ 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘣𝘪𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘪 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘪 𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘬?

𝘴𝘰𝘧𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨

⤷ 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘳 𝘸𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘢𝘴𝘵?

𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘨𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘦𝘻𝘳𝘢

⤷ 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘧 𝘪 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘥𝘰𝘨. 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯

I tried to cover my laughter with my pillow so that I wouldn't wake my parents, who were sleeping in the next room, yet somehow I wasn't surprised that they were all up despite it being late. I responded accordingly to all of them, though I wasn't really sure where I got the idea from.

Yet, I was so determined to do so, I convinced myself that all I needed now was my parent's permission and a steady itinerary. It wasn't going to be too hard though.

The next morning, before my parents left for the hospital, I bombarded their four am breakfast with my idea. Surprisingly, they supported the idea, as long as I could come up with the plan in the next two days.

They would be out of the country for the first week of the trip anyway, indulging themselves in a medical conference. I'm sure a part of them knew that leaving me home alone wouldn't be the greatest thing for my mental health.

It also helped that we had a lot of money, being doctors and all. Usually, they wouldn't let me spend money recklessly whenever I wanted, but this was the single exception that they had ever given me. Papa slid me the credit card across the table and my mother said she would reach out to some of her contacts for transportation.

With a smile and a hug from the two of them as they returned to work, I began to work on the plan, reserving and buying things for the trip. Almost three days after I brought up the idea, I was ready to leave the city of Bando : population 783, home of the Bandits and cheap liquor.

But we didn't leave for another week. It took a while for everyone's parents to agree to let them go. There was many phone calls from my parents and promises that we would be safe but eventually everyone consented.

That Saturday morning, my little home, which usually just housed my parents and me, was full of fifteen people. There were suitcases, backpacks, and seniors filling up the living room.

"Have you been crying again Saro?" A voice called out. I knew what was next, for I knew the voice like the back of my hand. There was an arm thrown around my shoulders, a knock on the side of my head, and then a hand to rub the top of my head.

The rest of the group looked over, trying to see if there was the soft pink around my eyes from crying. Which there were.

I shook my head and moved out of his grasp, "No I haven't. I don't know why you would think that Azu."

Before he could answer, another voice called out, one that I identified from the kitchen. "Do you kids want any food before you head out?" My mother asked, peeking her head around the wall that separated the living room and kitchen, "I'm not sure if any of you brought anything to eat so I made some."

Mother was a tiny Korean woman with long black hair. She stood at five foot two and I had inherited her brown monolid eyes. She knew all of the people in the living room from meeting them sometime through our high school years to pictures that she critiqued to the best of her abilities.

She sat a silver tray on the dining table and wiped her hands on the little apron she wore around her waist.

"You didn't have to do that Mrs. Robinson." The girl with many freckles exclaimed, her eyes widening at the food that sat on the tray.

"Of course I did Beatrice. It's so nice to see you all again, I just couldn't help but make everyone some food. Please take a seat wherever you can find one and eat up. There's a long journey ahead of you. And 사 로스," My name in her native language, " come help me with the rest of the dishes in the kitchen, please."

"More food, 어머니?" I groaned, shaking my head as my mother and I exchanged some words in Korean.

It didn't take long for the two of us to return to the living room, carrying three plates in our arms each. "Apparently, she's been cooking all day," I explained to the group, noticing the awkward quiet that overtook the room.

"Enjoy the food. I have to finish packing so I'll leave the food for you. 사 로스, don't forget to introduce everyone. It's only polite."  She kissed me on the cheek and disappeared up the stairs.

"Yes, 어머니." I mumbled, setting out some empty plates on the table, "Eat up. You already know she makes the best food."

There was a spread of laughter throughout the group but the awkward silence continued. It made sense, not many of them knew each other outside of having a couple of classes together, seeing each other at games/meets or in the hallway.

I was the only connection that they had between each other.

It took a while for everyone to get settled with plates piled full of food. Some seated on the black couch, others on the ground, a couple on the edge of the fireplace. I went last, piling up two plates of mixtures of stir fry, potstickers drenched in sweet sauce, fish cake balls, and little finger snacks. She really went all out for us.

But I couldn't eat just yet. Sitting on the ground, I placed the two plates on the fireplace so that I wouldn't accidentally step on either of them and cry for the rest of the night. "I guess I should introduce everyone. I know all of you but none of you really know each other."

"Yeah, that would be nice." A redhead boy called out sarcastically, noodles hanging from his mouth.

I shot him the middle finger and stuck out my tongue playfully, "That's why you're going last Ezra, you're terribly offended me and my sensitive feelings. We don't appreciate it by the way." That was just our interaction, so I hope nobody took it the wrong way. For good measures, I smiled brightly and got started on introducing each of my friends to my other friends.

"This is Adalyne. But I call her Addy, I'm not sure which one she prefers for y'all so you'll have to ask her yourself. She's a rock climbing queen though I'm not exactly sure how it all works. All I know is that there's a lot of powder involved. Plus we're obviously twins. I've gotten a lot of pictures of her playing the drums for my music-themed portfolio. But as you know drums are too big to bring along with us so maybe another time."

"This freckled mess is Beatrice or Bea. She doesn't talk much but she loves video games. I'm pretty sure I've lost every game that we've played together except maybe one game and that was Mario Kart- Baby circuit." The two of us laughed, for only the two of us knew how many we had played in the span of time that we were friends.

"That girl over there is Skye with an e. If you haven't noticed, Addy, Skye and I are actually triplets. It's the skin and good hair. In fact, you all can call us the good hair triplets." I explained, trying to keep a straight face but eventually I cracked a smile, which turned into a chuckle, "But real talk, she's on the swim team at BHS and if you ask nicely, perhaps she'll play the guitar for you." Skye looked over at the standing black case that was set aside with the rest of her stuff.

"My little brother Taj. If anyone hurts him, I would actually throw hands with you. No questions asked. Everyone knows I'm bout it too so. What's up? He basically lives here or I'm at his aunty's house if I'm not here. Also he's very...umm.. what's the word? Not magical but." I frowned, looking up at the ceiling trying to remember the word I was looking for, "Actually, nevermind. You'll figure it out soon enough."

"My boy Noah, a classic jokestar. 10 outta 10 would recommend if you're feeling down. Because I promise you're gonna feel better before you know it. Also if we go to an amusement park then he'll ride all the rides with you. Somehow he gets me to ride the rides every year, and I don't like rollercoasters. As much as I hate it, we can appreciate his daredevil energy."

"Cordelia is my ukulele sister. I would honestly love to see all of you music people get together and play some songs. That's very road trip vibes, so hop on it. We've watched almost every meteor shower on my roof. It results in really pretty pictures too so a bonus. Definitely a favorite. And I promise you've never really experienced a star show without some music."

"She's Emma but you might hear me call her Angel. I honestly have nicknames for everyone, hope you don't get too confused. She moved down from New York junior year and somehow ended up in this unmatched friend group. Her love for flowers is literally unmatched like she's always got some, it's crazy. And they're fresh. Which means she smells like fresh flowers, it's not creepy so don't look at me like that."

"This is Elowyn. She's a big geek for almost everything under the sun. I suggest not getting her started unless you can talk for hours about that same subject. Don't get me wrong, it's not a bad thing but if you aren't prepared, you're going to be confused. Actually, I think Bea would be a good person to start with, Winnie." I thought out loud, motioning to the girl with freckles and a DS in her pale hands.

"That's Azurite. Honestly just ignore him. I cannot stand him at all and he always thinks I want him to be on me." I teased, referencing his habit of knocking our heads together and ruffling my hair. It had been our thing since the beginning of the seventh grade when we first met. "But he's done a lot so I guess it all balances out. Plus he's one of our best basketball players at the high school. Maybe he'll be a big NBA player one day and I can say that I was best friends with someone famous."

"This here is our soft boy of the group, Loki. He's an amazing artist. I hope you do some paintings of the scenery while we're out." I smiled softly, leaning over to rub the head of a little black dog seated neatly at his feet, "And this is Nana, his service dog. She's one of our two sweet pups. I hope nobody minds that we're bringing one."

"Jeremy is just plain old Jeremy. But I still love him for him so don't think I mean anything by that. He's big crackhead energy just give him a couple minutes to get there. I promise you'll be worn out by the end of the day if you spent it entirely with him. But he's also like a sweetheart for no reason. So ladies, watch out. And men, watch out too." I gave a little wink, clicking my tongue with a little chuckle.

"This man right there is Ty Brown. He's a dumbass but he's my dumbass." I joked, resulting in him throwing a chip at me. I caught it before it hit the ground and tossed it in my mouth, "He's also basically my twin brother so I wouldn't be surprised if anyone got the two of us confused." The two of us were similar in appearance, but there was no way anyone would manage to confused the two of us for twins.

"And that fool Ezra. There's nothing to say about him because he's absolutely mean to me. That's his dog over there, Jaxton. He's not coming with us though, we've gotta drop him back off at his house. I told him he could bring Jax because I missed him too much. What a sweet pup." I called the husky over, dropped to my knees so that I could rub the dog's neck comfortably. Ezra threw a chip at me, which seemed to be the trend in the group, and I feed it to Jaxton.

"Actually, if he's bringing his dog," Ezra motioned over to the quiet Asian boy with his black boxer, "Should I bring Jaxton too? We would still have to go by the house so I can get his food and stuff but if everyone's good with it, I know he would love to come with us."

I looked around the room, silently asking the others if they had any problems with another dog coming with them and when nobody said anything against it, I nodded my head. "Of course you can bring him. We need two sweet puppies for it to be a real road trip anyway."

When I finished introducing everyone, I took a seat on the floor with my back on the brick of the fireplace. Finally, I could eat. Somehow my mother had managed to sneak in one of my favorite finger foods, Korean Bean Rice Balls. They were almost like Cheetos but I preferred these over those American chips any bay. I barely had the chance to finish my first plate before my father came down the stairs.

"Sari. Your chariot awaits you and your friends."

My pops was the complete opposite of my mother. He was much taller, standing at six foot three. His skin was the color of midnight but his eyes were bright blue, a genetic mutation that got him bullied for the majority of his life.

He fixed the cuffs of his sleeves and scanned the room "You invited a lot more guys than I thought you would. Maybe we should rethink this trip."

I rolled my eyes and quickly shook my head, "Oh Papa, you know all of these guys. Half of them are over here like it's their own home." I shot a couple of them looks, resulting in scattered laughter.

Papa gave me a concerned look and walked back up the stairs without another word. "I think he means our van's here for us." I explained getting of from the group once more. I shoved the rest of the food into my mouth and threw away the plate into a makeshift trash can.

"Let's boogie or we'll be behind schedule."