Haven

Bliss.

All of the other thoughts I had in mind - how mysterious Reeve was, how familiar everything about him felt, and how he kept saying he somehow knew me - vanished, replaced by only that one.

I surprised myself when I responded almost immediately to his kiss, faltering only for a few seconds before quickly matching his movements with my own.

It started off softly, with our mouths gently brushing against each other's. His lips were warm and soft, and he tasted like spearmint.

It took me a few seconds to realize I was smiling against his lips. I felt better and more comfortable than I had ever felt in the past few months, and everything about this was... good.

He paused long enough to curl his own lips into a grin.

And then the kiss turned aggressive, as if this was something he needed to do as much as he needed to breathe. I was slightly taken aback, but I didn't allow myself to think - I could only feel.

He craned his neck and leaned further down while I tilted my head up as far as it could go, selfishly devouring his taste.

Our lips danced perfectly in sync, like the flames of a candle - he took the lead, while I followed his steps. Together, we flickered, tantalized, and ignited each other from the fire within us.

His calloused, rough hand felt surprisingly smooth as it drifted from my chin to my cheek, gently caressing the skin in between. His free hand moved cautiously, going back and forth between tangling itself into my hair to resting on top of my waist. After a while, he finally settled for intertwining our hands together.

I lost track of the seconds... or had it been minutes?

I couldn't tell. I felt the world pause, and everything else disappeared as we stood together, drifting off into a our own land where time stood still.

I opened my eyes slightly and saw his long, thick eyelashes flutter.

What?

No. No, no. What am I doing?

This wasn't like me at all. I never paid attention to guys - let alone kissed any of them.

So what the hell is this?

Using the palms of my hands, I quickly pushed Reeve away. I expected him to fall, but seeing how I wasn't that strong, he only lightly stumbled.

His eyes shot open as he looked at me in surprise. "Crap. Sorry, Haven, I didn't mean to do that. I don't know what came over me. I --"

"Stop." My voice wavered, but I held my ground, glaring at him silently. I wiped my mouth with a shaky hand, hoping he couldn't see the effect his kisses had on me.

He left me breathless, and I wanted more - I wanted to continue this more than I had ever wanted to do anything. My lips felt empty without his, and I needed --

No, Haven!

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head rapidly, trying to push those thoughts out of my head.

How had I let it get this far? What was I doing?

What is he doing to me?

The thumping of my heartbeat hammered in my ears so loudly that I was afraid he could hear it. I took in a deep breath, trying to calm down my frantic pulse.

I regretted it instantly. His warm scent filled the air, clouding my thoughts and forcing me to lose focus yet again. There was a sudden nagging at my brain as I tried to figure out why he smelled so familiar. But I couldn't pinpoint it - I couldn't concentrate.

I was intoxicated by his clean, minty smell; it was a mixture of soap, mint, and freshly mowed grass, which oddly reminded me of summers spent at the park long ago. There was a hint of musky cologne, too. It wasn't an overwhelming scent like the Abercrombie and Fitch stores - it was sweet and subtle. Sweet like his smile and --

Snap out of it, Haven!

"I'm sorry--" he tried again, his eyes filled with concern. He took a step towards me, but I held my hand out to stop him from coming closer.

"Don't."

He hung his head and ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

How could I have been so stupid?

He was a stranger. The only things I knew about him were that he, for some unknown reason, had protected me from my father's blows on Friday night, and that he was a new student at West Court. But that was it.

So why had I kissed him so willingly?

Disappointed in myself, I shook my head. I thought he was different from the other guys that I had met. Or maybe I wanted him to be different. Either way, he wasn't.

He was just like the rest of them.

The same walls that had been so close to breaking down a few minutes ago shot right back up, sturdier than ever.

I took a few steps back, trying to put some space in between us so I could clear my head. Reeve tried to follow, hesitantly reaching for my arm.

"Don't!" I snapped again, more angry at myself than I was at him. "Don't come any closer."

"Please --"

"No."

"Haven..."

"I'm serious. Please. Don't follow me."

In my junior high school P.E. class, we were forced to run a mile every Friday. But I never did. I had served a lot of detentions for that, but I didn't care.

After binge-reading the entire Twilight series in two days, I started having nightmares that vampires and werewolves were chasing me in the middle of the night. But even in my dreams, I never ran.

I hated running, so I never did it.

But right now, I needed to get away. I had to rid myself of the image of him.

His full, pink lips, his vast, ocean-blue eyes, his perfect, stunning smile... He was all I could think of.

It didn't help that he was standing in front of me, looking straight into my eyes. His expression revealed feelings of sadness, curiosity, regret, and excitement all at once.

His hair rested casually on top of his cerulean eyes, hiding his left one slightly from view. His hands, the same ones that were holding me earlier, were now jammed deep into his pockets as he rocked back and forth on his feet.

He looked amazing.

But I shook my head again. Summoning all of my willpower and strength, I forced myself to push away all thoughts of him.

And I ran.

"He did what?" Ari paused in mid-swipe, her hand perfectly still on the counter top.

I avoided her striking, green eyes as they pierced into my soul. Instead, I focused all of my energy on scrubbing the table, imagining it was Reeve's face. With each swipe of the rag, I tried to erase a little bit of my mental image of him.

But it didn't work. Even with my eyes closed, I could still picture all of his perfect features clearly.

"He kissed me."

"Damn. I -- I don't even know what to say," she sputtered. "You knew him for like, what, five minutes? What the fudge?"

"Yeah," I said, releasing a heavy sigh.

She shook her head in disbelief and held her blonde curls back so they were no longer in her eyes. "I don't get it."

"Me neither."

She paused for a while, trying to process everything I had just told her. She readjusted her sparkly crop-top shirt so it revealed her sapphire dolphin belly button ring. Satisfied with her shirt's position, she smacked her bubblegum lips together and cracked her knuckles, which were covered in silver rings.

Finally, she spat, "New kid thinks he can just waltz in here and steal your first kiss? Who does he think he is? I'm about to whoop some booty. Let me give him a piece of my mind!"

Throwing my dirty rag in her direction, I frantically looked around to see if anyone heard her. "Jeez. Announce it to the whole world, why don't you?"

Ari threw her head back and laughed, and then eyed the only two customers in her family's restaurant as she attempted to whisper, "But seriously, he stole your lip virginity. He popped your kissing cherry! How can you be so calm about it?"

"Trust me, I'm anything but calm." I shook my head, and then rung the damp towel over the sink. "You should see the wheels in my brain turning. It's working harder right now than when I was trying to solve that calculus problem this morning."

Ari scrunched her button nose, and then said, "Ew. Don't remind me. We have a ton of homework to do tonight, and it's only the first day of school."

"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm actually glad we're at work right now. It gives me an excuse not to start that load of assignments."

Ari nodded her head in agreement.

We wiped the tables and counters in silence for a few minutes, both lost in deep concentration.

My heart and my head wrestled internally, still trying to make sense of what happened.

I can't believe he kissed me.

But you wanted it to happen.

No, I didn't.

Yes, you did.

Shut up, head! You don't always have to be right.

But I am.

Okay, maybe I did want it to happen. But why would I want such a thing? I don't even know the guy!

Don't you? Everything about him seems so familiar, but you can't figure out why...

Ugh, this is so complicated. Why did I let him kiss me? Why did I kiss him back?

Doesn't matter. What's done is done. Now, we have to deal with the consequences.

So... what's next?

I don't know.

I don't know, either...

The sound of Ari clearing her throat forced me to snap out of my mental debate with myself. I looked up from the table and locked gazes with her fiery, green eyes.

She tilted her head to the left, shifting her perfect, high ponytail from one side to the other. Her eyes softened as she asked, "Well, are you?"

"What?"

"I asked if you were okay," she said softly. She stared into my eyes, probably attempting to decipher the constant poker face that I always had plastered on out of habit.

"Yeah. Maybe? I don't know."

"How do you feel right now?"

"I'm fine."

She paused, furrowing her eyebrows and giving me a look of disbelief. "I call bull on that. How are you really feeling?"

I sighed. She knew me too well, so there was no point in lying to her. "Used. Worthless. It's like I was nothing more than just another pawn in his game."

"Honey, no. Don't think about it like that. You are not worthless."

I looked away, feeling ashamed. I had no one to blame but myself, which didn't help the fact that I felt like trash. "I bet he thinks I'm some easy-to-get chick who he can play with until he gets bored and decides to move onto the next."

"That's his problem, not yours. Forget about his ass."

"I'm trying. But I can't."

"Was he any good?" she asked, abruptly changing the topic.

"Good at what?"

"You know, sucking your face."

I laughed. As always, Ari knew how to make any situation better. "I have nothing to compare it to, other than the back of my hand or my pillow..." I trailed off, brushing my lips with my fingers and thinking back to his kiss. "But yeah. He was good."

Her eyes twinkled as she said, "Then just think of this as nothing more than practice for the real thing. If anything, you're the one who used him."

"I guess."

"Tell me I'm right, my Haven ho."

"As always, you're right, Queen Ari."

"Now tell me I'm pretty."

I tapped my chin with my finger, acting as if I was in deep thought. A few seconds later, I said, "Nah. I don't like lying."

She grinned mischievously and winked. "Whatever. I already know you think I'm the fairest of them all. Bow down to your queen, my dear. All hail Queen Ari!"

We burst into giggles like little elementary school kids who shared a secret, and my mood brightened. The two customers glanced at us and then looked at each other.

One of them mouthed, what's their problem?

The other woman shrugged, and then continued to read her newspaper and eat her fries.

"Thanks, Tuna," I said, looking back at Ari. I was so grateful to have her in my life, and I didn't even want to imagine what life would've been like without her in it.

I would've told her that, but I still wanted her head to be able to fit through the doors.

"No problem, my lovely peasant."

I sighed. "You tried to warn me about Reeve this morning, but I didn't listen. Remind me to pay attention to you next time."

"I told you, I'm always right. I'm a walking answer key, remember?"

I laughed, reaching for the nearest thing so I could throw it at her. Her eyes widened when she saw that the object turned out to be my phone, so I changed my mind and settled for rolling my eyes instead.

"I guess all the rumors were true," she said as we began to sweep the floors and close for the evening.

"Yup. He's a real player."

"A bad boy," she agreed.

Deep down, I knew this was true.

So why couldn't I get him out of my mind?

A/N: Hehe, hope you guys liked this update! Ahhh, I hope you guys love Haven and Ari as much as I do. It's always a lot of fun to write their scenes, and they make me laugh. A lot. Lol! (Would their ship name be Aaven? or Hari? Hmm... HAHA!) Their friendship is GOALS, and I seriously wish I had an Ari in my life. Haha!

Anyways, check out this AWESOME book cover my friend Sherwritesbooks made for 'I Won't'!

ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL? I love it so much, hehe! Thank you again, my dear friend ❤️

As always, thank you ALL for reading and loving this book. I honestly don't know what I would do without you guys! #teamRAVEN forever!