Prepare

verb – 1. make ready for use or consideration. 2. make or get ready to do or deal with something. 3. (be prepared to do) be willing to do.

I should write my own dictionary at some point. It'd be much more accurate.

"Whenever I complain about school, Dad always says, out in the war zones, his men make the best out of the situation." I muttered at the lunch table, toying with my sandwich. "He says I should do the same."

James frowned across the table at me, picking up his apple. "There's a bit of a difference between school and places like Afghanistan." he said, biting into the fruit.

"I beg to differ." said Charlie, taking the seat beside me. "School is just like a battlefield, full of enemies, people out to get you, things to blow up in your face, don't you think so?"

"It's not the same though really, is it?" James muttered, barely audibly as he swallowed his mouthful of apple.

"Not exactly." shrugged Charlie. "Certainly the mortality rate in school is less than that in..."

"Do you two live to argue with each other?" I asked, cutting across them. "When have you ever agreed? It's like..."

"A lovers tiff?" said Xandrell's voice as he took the seat beside me.

James narrowed his eyes and glared at Xandrell. "What exactly are you insinuating?" he muttered. Charlie was also looking at him like he was trying to psychically burn a hole in the middle of his face.

Xandrell could obviously sense the anger in his voice, since he immediately tensed. Yes, it was 'step-in-and-save-Xandrell' time again.

"Xandrell, I need to talk to you." I said, standing up and grabbing him by the shoulder. "I need to talk to you about..."

"Ok, let's go." said Xandrell, saving me the effort of trying to think of a plausible excuse.

I glanced back at the two boys, still looking like they wanted to rip Xandrell's head off. "James, calm down, Charlie, I've got a chocolate bar I don't want. Help yourself."

"Oh thanks, Amy." said Charlie gratefully, reaching into my small Tupperware box without a second thought.

I smiled a little at him, still wondering why I felt an overpowering motherly feeling towards him, when I was really a mother now.

Then I felt a hand take mine, and I looked around at Xandrell. "We probably should go, James just put his middle finger up at me."

I giggled as he dragged me out of the dining hall and into the playground. "You certainly know how to peeve him off."

"I don't know what it is, he actually hates me." said Xandrell looking slightly disheartened. "What am I doing wrong?"

I giggled slightly. "You're hopeless."

"You're right, I am." he shrugged walking away across the courtyard towards a secluded corner.

I dashed after him. "Xandrell? Is something wrong?"

"Something's always wrong these days Amy." he muttered. "Whether it be the fact we just had a baby that your Dad wants to get rid of, or the fact that your best friends probably want to kill me now."

He reached the corner and turned his back on it, slumping against the wall. I stared at him. His face was stony, concerned, like he was deep in thought, and deeply troubled. It was the first time I'd ever seen him look remotely teenager-like. "They don't want to kill you, and Dad's just trying to keep my life vaguely normal."

"Is that even possible?" asked Xandrell, glancing up at me before turning his gaze to the sky. "I'm getting more and more worried every day, Amy." he said slowly. "And with Molly here too, it's only making me more agitated."

"How exactly?" I asked, also frowning at the sky. "Should I be worried too?"

He shrugged. "Maybe."

I looked at him. "You're being even more cryptic than usual, can't you just tell me straight?"

He didn't look at me. "There's not a great chance it'll happen anyway, why should you worry?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Maybe because I care?" I said, making him look around at me. "Xandrell, if this has anything to do with you and Molly, I want to be involved too."

He shook his head at me. "I'd rather keep you innocent." he said, walking away from the corner.

I quickly glanced around and breathed a sigh of relief that no-one had been around to hear him say that, or the rumours would only intensify.

"You can't walk away from this you know." I told him as I ran to catch up with him. "Whatever it is, it's obviously bothering you. Please talk to me!"

"Why?" he asked whipping round and narrowing his eyes at me a little. It was the angriest I'd ever seen Xandrell at me. "Amy, it doesn't matter! Just drop it!"

I glared at him. "You're the most confusing thing I've ever come across, did you know that?" I snapped. "Sometimes you just piss me off so much!"

I walked away, back towards the dining hall as quickly as I could. James and Charlie both looked up shocked. "What?"

"You look... mad... you know, annoyed." muttered James. "Xandrell get too much for you?"

"Something like that." I mumbled, flopping down beside Charlie. "I hate him at times with his stupid cryptic answers. Why can't he be normal, like you two..." I paused, thoughtfully. "Well that may be a bit of an overstatement."

"Shut up." chuckled Charlie, poking me gently in the arm.

"Well you've got to make it up with him by next Friday." said James, picking at a small bunch of grapes.

I frowned at him. "I have? Why?"

He looked up, frowning a little. "Prom. Remember?"

I felt my jaw drop. Prom was less than a fortnight away?! "Have you two gotten suits yet?" I asked.

"Nope." said Charlie shrugging. "James and I are going with our mum's this weekend."

"Mind if Xandrell tags along?" I asked.

James made a disgusted face, while Charlie shrugged again. "Why not?"

"Why does that prat have to come with us?" snapped James. "Why can't you take him Amy?"

"Oh come on, guys!" I said pleadingly. "He's under the impression you both hate him, why can't you just be nice to him?"

"He's not far wrong with his assumptions." muttered James, putting a grape in his mouth.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're impossible." I muttered.

"AMY!" called a voice suddenly. I looked up as Tasha rushed forwards to me. "You'll never guess who just asked me to prom!"

"Well, from the excitement..." I said slowly. "I will take a wild stab in the dark at Zac Efron."

"I wish you would stab him in the dark." muttered James, so I glared at him.

"Don't you have to be pessimistic somewhere else?" I said stiffly.

"Not until at least two o'clock." said James eating another grape.

"MAX!" cried Tasha, so I looked back at her.

I frowned for a moment, before realising. "What, Gibson?"

"Yeah!" Tasha said happily doing a little dance on the spot. "Oh, my God! I can't believe it!"

"That's brilliant!" I grinned at her. Tasha had had a very tiny crush on him for just over a year. How great was this?!

Charlie roared with laughter and Tasha looked up startled. "What's so funny?"

"You're going prom with Gibby!" laughed Charlie. "Shameful, Tash."

Tasha rolled her eyes. "Punch him for me Amy, I have to go."

"Go where, for Christ's sake, it's lunchtime." I said frowning at her.

"I have some unfinished business with Max in the library." said Tasha, before adding "oh shut up James!"

"You're the one that said it!" sniggered James as Tasha stalked out of the dining hall.

"So I've organised a play-date for you and the boys." I joked as Xandrell and I made our way home that evening.

"Oh what fun." muttered Xandrell.

I looked up at his deadly serious face. "Don't sound too cheerful about it then." I muttered. "Xandrell, I thought you wanted to make it up with James and Charlie."

"Yeah, but by going shopping?" Xandrell pulled a slightly disgusted face. "That's what girls do for bonding sessions. I've researched that. You're the only person I'm willing to go shopping with, Amy."

I sighed. "You're so stubborn at times! You're just like James."

"Oh for Christ's sake, you're off again about James!" snarled Xandrell as we reached the house and I found my key. "You know what, how about I just take Molly and go home?"

I looked up at him. "Because I would like to think that you love me too much to do that. I don't understand why you're always so tetchy about him. James is nice."

Xandrell rolled his eyes as I pushed the door open. "Whatever." he muttered.

I froze in the doorway, staring into the front room. My mother was sitting on the sofa, the lump gone from under her shirt and a bundle of blankets in her arms. She looked up as the door opened and smiled at me.

"Dad and Jenny are upstairs trying to fix a second cradle for your little one." she said. "Want to see your little brother?"

I stood and stared at her. Then I felt Xandrell push me very gently in the back so that I moved towards where my mother was sitting. She carefully held out the bundle and plopped it into my arms. I stared down into the tiny peach face beneath the folds of white cloth. Two periwinkle blue eyes blinked up at me. His hair was messy, and dark. One of his tiny clenched fists was on top of the blankets, and I immediately marvelled, as I did with all babies, how tiny and perfect he was.

"He's so beautiful." I whispered, a smile tugging at my lips as I carefully handed him back to my mother. "Hey, little Nat."

"He's gorgeous isn't he." said my mother, going back to cooing over my new little brother.

"Yeah." I said as Xandrell tapped me on the shoulder.

"I think we ought to go and see Molly you know." he whispered. "She's been on her own all day."

"You're right." I said quickly, and we quickly excused ourselves from my mother's presence, dashing up the stairs and opening the door to my parents' room where we had spent the last night.

"Mummy! Daddy! You're home!" squealed a little voice and we hurried over to the cradle where Molly was lying giggling.

"Yes, we're home now." I said, reaching into the cradle and holding her carefully. "Tomorrow, do you mind being left with Nanny again?"

"No." she said, frowning a little. "But I'd rather spend the days with you... Mummy, I heard them come in earlier, and they were talking to someone called Nathaniel... who's he?"

It suddenly occurred to me that I was having a more civilised conversation with my day old daughter than I would with many of my sixteen year old classmates. How's that for ironic?

"Nathaniel is... he's technically your Uncle..." I said slowly. "He's my brother. You also have an Aunt called Auntie Jenny."

Molly frowned at me. "And Auntie Jennie's your other brother right?"

"Uh, not quite." I said with a little laugh. This was one of those things I could explain with time. I mean, we had all the time in the world.

"Right, Amy, you give Molly a vocabulary lesson or something." muttered Xandrell, still looking troubled. "I need to do some work."

I frowned at him. "Work on what? We didn't get any homework."

He shrugged and turned away. "Just work in general. You know."

I didn't know, but I wasn't going to start trying to understand the male mind now.