I've made hundreds of mistakes that have hurt my friends, family, and lovers.

I have made thousands of errors that do nothing but harm.

I am a human that exemplifies what it is to be human; to be a wreck, a car accident in slow-motion, knowing what happens next but being unable to stop it.

Relationships are a weak point for me.

I start relationships that hurt me fast, but I've already fallen faster than that. I put my all in whether or not I get anything out.

I want to be loved but don't seem to care what it takes to make it there. I've dated those that have hit me, hurt me, touched me. I've been with people just so I wasn't alone.

And it left a mark.

I'm terrified of relationships. Of love. Of people.

And yet I crave it all. I need it like I need air or water. I am unable to be happy without it.

Yet here we are.

Was it fear that made me back off? No, if it was, I probably would have left sooner, right..? And if it was fear, then... Why now of all times?

Was I scared of the past? Because if so I would just have to remember one things about you, about us, about our relationship, and I should have calmed right down.

It's not the same.