Depression she's a fucking bitch one day life's good then you start getting that feeling again and then you feel broken and want to give up life is shitty I really feel like there's no one there for me a lot because I feel lonely and it's just sad ya know attempting suicide is fucking sad Ik because I did right in front or really one of the only people who actually understood and cared about me my fucking sister that's the one person I love because she's been there people say drugs are bad and if you do drugs your s shitty person and you don't care about others and being a drug addict I really understand why people use drugs and how hard it is to quite because you depend on those drugs to get through your day and without those drugs life feels cold and it's gunna fall apart someone I get just too depressed that I can't even grab the razor blade and that is when Ik I'm really not ok I haven't been able to cry in awhile because your so numb inside that you just can't let it out because you have forgotten what it's like to feel that pain. I remember one time I got in trouble at school and I got suspended my mom was so mad at me she yelled at me took my phone and she was being so fucking mean and I had been doing everything for my mom that I mentally drained myself I was so done at that point I took 10 on my sleep meds and I felt cold but I felt closure and that feeling of almost dying was amazing I felt ok that it would all be over soon and I could just relax one person I always trusted started talking shot about me I was so fucking hurt we would do that I didn't care about her feeling because her Turing on me like that mad my trust issues worse I went into a rage and started saying hurtful words because she just broke another piece of my soul like everyone does I don't really tell people what's wrong or open up because everyone I did open up to isn't here anymore and that shit kills me there not here they did care enough to help me or think of me they left because the used me like everyone does and I've come to terms with that so I really don't go talking to people I don't have friends really maybe 5 at most sad