So last night I babysat four siblings and the 5-year-old is kind of like four kids all on her own.

To start with, she greeted me at the door shouting, "I did my own eyeliner!" and it was like practically in her eyebrows.

Then she took a bath with her oldest sister, and already I was like this is not gonna go well, and I heard their "discussions" starting up, and then the five-year-old came marching out of the bathroom without a single stitch of clothing on.

Five-year-old: She said—!!!! (*insert accusations that don't make any sense*)

Me: It's okay, just get in the tub.

*Two minutes later*

*Five year old comes out of bathroom still without a stitch of clothing*

Five-year-old: I forgot to show you the dance I learned in school.

Me: GET IN THE BATHTUB.

*her toddler brother rounds the corner*

Five-year-old: *screams* Don't look at me! I'm naked!

So then I was upstairs monitoring the two younger ones as they took a bath, and then here comes the five-year-old again in nothing but a towel. The eyeliner had not completely washed off.

Five-year-old: *in a panic* I PUT THE WRONG STUFF ON MY HAIR AND NOW IT'S DIRTY!

Me: *looking at her perfectly clean hair* Um trust me it's fine

Finally everyone got out of the bathtub and they settled down to watch Mulan. One of the (animated) guys took his shirt off.

Five-year-old: *screams* I can't watch this! It's showing his privates! *Covers her eyes*

Me: Um men's chests aren't private

Five-year-old: *from behind her hands* YES THEY ARE!

Eight-year-old: *rolls her eyes up to heaven*

Me: Men can take their shirts off. It's fine.

Five-year-old: No it's not! You can see his BOOBIES!

Four-year-old, who does whatever the five-year-old does: I can't look! *covers her eyes*

Me: Yes you can. She's just being a nut.

Four-year-old: Oh, okay. *Watches the movie*