Anyone of y'all who are gonna say she's weak and too dependent WHENEVER she goes to Harry cuz of her nightmares and panic attacks I'm specially talking about her dependency on his comfort after those nightmares. Y'all need to learn how to actually empathize with the female lead because it's SO frustrating how some people are just so far up Harry's ass to do that OR just fail to understand characters.

I know this book is shit and I apologize for it. But I'm not gonna apologize for making a character dependent on another due to their want to survive something called panic attacks and nightmares.

Movie 🎥 First Blood (1982)

Edited

Happy Reading xx

~T

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S C A R L E T T 💣

  I was kicking blindly at whoever was trying to grab me, high-pitched screams leaving my lips as I was terrified it was Andrei and those men trying to touch me again. My eyes shot open when I heard a familiar voice yell my name. I locked gazes with a pair of pale blue eyes. Louis.

   "Scarlett you're o-" He couldn't continue as I tried to swing my fist at him, but he dodged it easily, his eyes flickering to mine with slight confusion. "Lettie stop!" he yelled when I frantically started kicking and thrashing around like a wild animal.

  More arms grabbed me; this time the person I locked gazes with was Dexter. His nut-brown eyes gazing at me worriedly while he brought his hand up to my cheek. I shuddered. He reminded me of Andrei for some reason, so did Louis. Louis had the same color eyes as Andrei's one eye, and Dexter had brown eyes, exactly like Andre's left eye. Their hands felt cold for some reason, and calloused, just like Andrei's and those disgusting men's.

  I fell to the floor, bumping my shoulder against the coffee table as I continued to shuffle back and away from Louis and Dexter. In my heart, I knew they meant no harm, that they just wanted to comfort me because they were worried sick. But my brain was too over-whelmed by my nightmare and I was starting to have a panic attack. I didn't even have my pills with me, how on earth was I supposed to get through this?

   "Scarlett," Louis whispered in a soft tone, kneeling in front of me as I curled up into a tight ball against the wall, peering at him in fear. "Lettie, please don't be scared," he said softly, touching my arm.

  I flinched, letting out a loud whimper before hiding my face away from both of them. I needed to calm down. But I didn't know how! Harry always told me to breathe, but it was hard without him helping me. I needed Harry. He was the only one who could calm me down.

  My heart was racing now, causing my chest major discomfort as I clutched it tightly. Short uneven breaths were drawn into my lungs, tears were constantly streaming down my cheeks, and tiny whimpers were leaving my lips as I tried my hardest to calm down. I was trembling vigorously, images of my nightmare were flashing right in front of my eyes, reminding me again and again of the pain I had felt in the dream when Andrei and all those other men had a go with me. My father's and Spencer's yells were ringing in my ears as I hugged myself tightly whispering one name repeatedly.

   "What's she saying?" Louis whispered frantically to Dexter who cocked his head towards me.

   "It sounds like Harry." As soon as Dexter said his name I spoke in a shaky breathy voice.

   "H-H-Harry," I stuttered weakly, feeling my throat close up all of a sudden. Somewhere in the background I heard Dexter shout at Louis to go get Harry. I couldn't help but feel a surge of relief at that, only for it to be shot down once I felt that choking sensation again.

   "Hold on Lettie. Harry's coming." I heard Dexter's voice break as he spoke to me. I let out a sob at that, a really pained body-racking sob. "Oh god Scarlett," I heard Dexter say quietly, his voice strained. I knew it hurt him to see me like this, terrified of my own best friend.

  I could feel it flooding me, taking over my body and powers as I cried heavily; the terror. Suddenly the door burst open, making a loud noise that caused me to flinch. I wasn't looking at whatever just happened because I was too busy hiding from whatever was coming towards me. That loud bang, which was caused by the door, immediately reminded me of the nightmare, where Andrei bursted through the door with his gang.

  My heart froze all of a sudden when I heard a soft yet deep raspy voice speak to me. I slowly turned my head to peer at whoever it was. My teary eyes met Harry's emerald ones. He was kneeling in front of me, his eyes surprisingly filled with worry and concern, were gazing at me. His lips were parted slightly at the sight of my blotchy flushed face; I still had an expression of fear, panic and pain covering it.

   "Oh Scar," he whispered. A lone tear rolled down my cheek at his words. I cautiously watched him as he extended his arm, allowing his fingers to brush my cheek to capture the teardrop. I flinched slightly, looking away from him. "Come here," he murmured to me, holding his arms out for me.

   "H-He's coming for me," I couldn't help but whisper anxiously, my eyes darting to every corner of the room, once they landed on Dexter and Louis I looked away quickly.

   "Why is she scared of us?" Louis asked Harry worriedly, his voice breaking a little.

   "Shut the fuck up," Harry hissed at him. "Just leave. You're making her feel uncomfortable," he whispered harshly, making Dexter and Louis leave quietly before turning back to me. But they were still standing in the corner watching me worriedly. "Scar, look at me baby," he breathed.

   "H-Harry, he touched me, and t-there were other men and my d-dad was watching and s-so was Spencer and they killed them both i-in front of m-me," I started to cry again, my noisy sobs filling the room.

   "Listen to me Scarlett," Harry whispered a bit firmly. "It's over. It's all over now and it's not real. Andrei won't come near you because I won't let him. Okay?" he asked and I nodded slowly, sniffling and breathing slowly. "Now come here so I can hold you," he said, extended his arms out for me.

  This time I shifted a bit, loosening my arms around me as I pulled my head up more to gaze at Harry. He nodded encouragingly, stretching his arms more, beckoning me to step into them. My heart literally exploded for the hundredth time as I broke down again, diving into his arms and wrapping my arms around his shoulders. I sobbed for fifteen minutes straight, weeping as Harry rubbed my back and whispered soothing words into my ear.

   "Baby, you need to breathe properly. You're hyperventilating," he muttered, pulling back a little to cup my cheek firmly.

   "I-I-I can't," I whimpered.

   "Yes you can. Come on; breathe. Just like I taught you. One, two, three-" he said before inhaling deeply with me following. My lungs welcomed the fresh breath of air, giving them relief as I exhaled and inhaled in time with Harry.

   "Good girl," he murmured in encouragement, watching me breathe on my own. Once my heart and breathing rate had returned back to normal, I shut my eyes and nuzzled my face into the crook of Harry's neck as I sighed deeply. I felt him run his fingers through my tangled hair gently, easing the knots as his other hand held me to him. "Are you feeling better now?" he asked quietly, I just hummed in reply.

   "Tired," was all I managed to say before he placed a hand under my bum. He somehow managed to lift me up, my legs wrapping around his waist lazily as he carried me over to the sofa. It was big enough for both of us to sleep on, so with Harry on his back, I laid half of my body on top of his, hugging it to me as I cuddled into his warmth.

   "Why did you leave?" he asked me all of a sudden, making my heart race once again. This was seriously the wrong time to talk about the whole drama we just had.

   "Can we not talk about it?" I gently asked, tracing the outline of his tattoos absentmindedly.

    "Of course," he murmured in reply, brushing my hair away from my face before gently tucking it behind my ear. I found myself wanting to move away once I remembered what he done to cause me to come to Dex and Louis' in the first place, but I held my ground, enjoying his comfort a little too much.

   "It was so bad," I couldn't help but whisper.

   "What was, baby?" he asked silently.

   "The nightmare," I murmured back, noticing him growing oddly quiet as he held me firmly to his chest with both his strong arms.

   "Why is it you have even worse nightmares when we're not sleeping together?" he sighed quietly.

   "I don't know," I whispered against his skin, just as clueless as he was. "Why are you the only person who can calm me down from a panic attack, without me using my pills?"

   "I am?" he asked, his voice laced with slight surprise.

   "Yes."

   "Not even your father?"

   "Nope," I yawned tiredly. "Can we sleep now?"

   "Of course," he yawned as well. My lips parted in slight shock when he pressed his sweet lips against my forehead, in a gentle kiss that made my insides melt.

I hated that he was trying to do this to me after he slept with Natalie and abused me. I wanted to shove him away, but I couldn't. As much as I hated it, I depended on him. His comfort was the only thing that helped whenever I had my panic attacks, and unfortunately that's what is making me go back to him.

    "Goodnight Harry," I murmured drowsily, my eyes fluttering close.

   "Goodnight Scar."

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  I awoke from a deep sleep. My eyes groggily opening while a small yawn escaped my lips. It took me a moment to figure out what sort of position Harry and I were in.  It was a very complicated position. Both of us were on our sides, facing each other, chests pressed against each others and arms wound tightly around one another. Harry's face was nestling in the crook of my neck, his arms curled around my torso as he held me to him. My legs were surprisingly looped around his waist, my arms roped around his broad shoulders loosely as my face was sort of buried into the curls at the top of his head.

  My fingers were gently laced through his soft curls, my nose inhaling strangely pleasant smell of them as I continued to play with his ringlets quietly. Harry shifted slightly all of a sudden, his forearms wrapping tighter around my half-bare stomach, my t-shirt rising even more.

   "Scar," he rasped, his chest vibrating as he spoke. His morning state made it extremely hard for me to resist him ; he was a mixture of adorable and sexy. His cheeks slightly flushed, his plush lips extra pink, his eyes a dull green all while his voice was huskier than normal and the piercings on his face added sexiness to the look.

   "Hmm?" I murmured against his hair.

   "Late for training," he mumbled, his voice muffled by the skin of my neck.

   "So?" I questioned boldly.

   "Attitude," he reminded sternly, his hand moving to slap my bum abruptly. The action was meant to be playful but I couldn't help but gasp loudly and tense up all of a sudden, wriggling out of his hold. I felt all the images of the nightmare rushing back to my brain all of a sudden. "Scar? What's wrong?" he mumbled in confusion, pulling his face away from the crook of my neck

  His brows lowered and lips pouted slightly when he noticed the slightly pained and scared look on my face. His hand rose to cup my cheek gently, his thumb caressing the skin of my cheek.

   "Baby what's wrong?" he asked in confusion. "I didn't hit that hard," he muttered, before looking at me with a questioning look. "Did I?"

   "No," I whispered, whimpering when another image of Andrei bending me over his bony knees flashed right before my eyes, making me cringe.

   "Then tell me what's wrong," he gently pleaded, scowling slightly at how I wasn't saying anything because I was too freaked out by everything. "It's just me, you can tell me anything," he whispered, his thumb running over my cheekbone repeatedly as if to wipe away the tears that were going to come leaking down.

   "Andrei," I started, pausing momentarily to swallow thickly as Harry nodded encouragingly. "H-He bent me over his knee and-"

   "Shh it's okay I understand now," Harry said quickly, pecking my lips surprisingly before pulling me to him. "I'm sorry," he apologized sheepishly, running his lanky fingers through my long locks. "We need to find a solution for all these nightmares you're having," he muttered quietly.

   "I used to have medication for them but they only made them worse," I mumbled distractedly, feeling my hands wander all over his tattooed chest.

   His skin was firm and smooth under the pads of my fingers, except for a few bumps that were his scars. I curiously traced the outline of one particular scar that stood out; the jagged flesh was situated right on his upper chest, standing out apart from his tattoos. Something distracted my gaze momentarily, my eyes darted down his chest, noticing two other small lumps, one near the top right wing of his butterfly tattoo, the other near the bottom left wing. They didn't look like scars to me; I touched them curiously, earning a shudder from Harry.

   "Are those...are those nipples?" I stifled a laugh, looking up at him with an amused smile. He glared at me, before letting the corner of his lips curve upwards into a small grin. "You have four nipples!" I giggled quietly, letting my fingers brush against each one, counting them as I did so, him shuddering again as I did so.

   "Stop that," he hissed softly, making me giggle as he tried to grab my wrist but I tugged it away quickly. His fern eyes burned into mine as I felt my smile fade away once I remembered what had happened yesterday before I came to Louis and Dexter. "What's wrong now?" he questioned, sensing my uneasiness.

   "Nothing," I mumbled, untangling myself from him and getting off the couch. I know I was acting bipolar for switching moods so quickly, but I couldn't help it. As much as he pretended to care for me whenever I was in pain, he still went back to Natalie at the end of the day.

   "Scarlett," Harry started, following me to the bathroom. I slammed the door shut at his face, locking it before turning around to run my fingers through my hair.

  He helped me out yesterday and I was ever so grateful for that, but he had sex with Natalie. After yesterday night I felt as if we were closer now, the fact that he's the only person who could comfort me from a panic attack, without the aid of my pills, was strange yet it brought us closer in a way. I wasn't sure if he's going to go back to Natalie after this and I hope he won't, but I needed some time to think about all of this.

   Once I had done my business, I searched the cupboards of the bathroom for an extra toothbrush, smiling in victory once I had found one. Quickly brushing my teeth, I rinsed them and left the bathroom. My eyes quickly scanning the room, looking for Harry, but he wasn't here. Instead Louis greeted me.

   "Hey Scarlett, how're you doing?" he asked me softly, rubbing his left eyes with his knuckle before ruffling his messy copper-brown hair.

   "I'm feeling better Louis," I smiled gently, before I pulled him into a hug. "I'm sorry for the way I acted yesterday Lou, I didn't mean for it to happen but I was scared and your eyes reminded me of Andrei and so did Dexter's," I rambled as Louis hugged me back, tightening his arms.

   "It's okay Lettie, I'm just happy Harry came in time to help you out. But one question, how on earth did Dexter and I remind you of Andrei?" he pulled back, gazing at me with slight confusion.

   "Andrei has multi-colored eyes; one pale blue and one dark brown. You have pale blue eyes and Dexter has dark brown eyes," I explained briefly, noticing him nodding in understanding.

   "Oh, that's the reason. You worried the shit out of Dexter and I!" he exclaimed all of a sudden, slapping my shoulder lightly while I giggled softly.

   "Sorry," I grinned sheepishly, before my eyebrows shot up when I heard Louis stomach grumble. "Someone's hungry," I commented jokingly, nudging his stomach with my elbow before making my way towards the kitchen.

   "Morning Scarlett! How are you feeling?" Dexter asked in concern, knitting his dark eyebrows together.

   "I'm feeling much better Dex, thank you for asking," I smiled softly, looking around the kitchen. "Hey, have you seen Harry?"

   "He left. Didn't really give much of a reason why, but he told me to tell you to meet him in the training room at 8:59, sharp," Dexter informed me and I nodded, feeling slightly disappointed. Will Harry go back to his same asshole self now? Will he still mess around with Natalie while sleep with me because I can't handle my own nightmares? Questions like these bombarded my poor brain as I sat down on a stool near the kitchen island. "What else did he tell you?" I spoke up.

   "What?" Dexter frowned.

   "Don't play dumb with me Dex," I pointed a finger at him sternly. "Stop lying and tell me what he said," I said seriously, giving him a hard stare until he obliged.

   "He said not to tell anyone about what Louis and I saw," he sighed, making my expression fall a little. Harry obviously didn't want anyone to know about how he let his guard down last night to comfort me.

   "It's not like you guys were going to say anything anyways," I grumbled quietly.

   "I wouldn't have, but Louis; maybe. You know how much of a chatterbox he is," Dexter said, giving me a sympathetic look before he set a plate full of bacon and eggs in front of me. "Eat up," he shot me an uplifting grin.

   "Y'know, Dex and I have never seen Harry be that nice and caring since like, forever," Louis said as he strolled into the kitchen taking the seat in front of me.

   "What?" I frowned slightly, while they both rolled their eyes at how clueless I was being. "Oh come on, he's not that cruel," I mumbled quietly, while they looked at each other for a second before bursting out into a fit of laughter.

   "Saying Harry is not cruel is like saying I'm gay," Louis giggled. I gave him a look, which he returned with a glare. "I'm not gay you guys! I like vagina okay!" he yelled, while Dexter rolled his eyes and I laughed quietly.

   "Whatever helps you sleep at night," I shook my head, a short laugh escaping my lips when Louis frowned adorably.

   "Anyways, Harry is not cruel with you I guess. What Louis and I saw last night was shocking, the part where Harry comforted you was the most appalling," Dexter explained as I listened to him earnestly.

   "Are you sure he's never been like this?" I asked hopelessly, still trying not to believe that Harry was never like this before he met me.

   "Positive. The way he handled you, it's like he cares about you," Louis told me, shoveling bacon into his mouth.

   "But he doesn't," I mumbled quietly.

   "Maybe he's different today, after what happened yesterday night," Dexter suggested, making me nod slightly.

   "I just have this feeling that he's going to be the same again," I shook my head, finishing off my breakfast before standing up. "I'll see you guys later, don't wanna be late for training with Shit Styles," I laughed waving them off before I left the apartment.

  I got on with my daily routine, showering, dressing up in all black athletic clothes and etc. As I was braiding my hair, my mind drifted away to Harry once again. I really hope he isn't going to be as rude to me as before now, what happened yesterday night brought us closer for sure, and it would suck if Harry continued to treat me horribly again. As much as I tried to stay optimistic about this, my sub-conscious was a pessimist, always reminding me how it was pretty much inevitable for Harry to return to his old-self whenever I'm not in pain or crying.

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-this has been edited, and I've seen the comments on this chapter and they're a bit frustrating. Like yeah I know Scarlett is dependent and weak asf but there's a flipping reason for that. Does nobody bother to consider what's going on? Or do SOME of y'all like to judge too quickly and not be considerate? Like honestly if harry was the one crying all the time, y'all be feeling pity for him but because it's the female lead y'all just don't.

Like her nightmares are tortuous and just fucking horrible so she doesn't care if she seems weak whenever she gives into harry. She needs him because only he can stop them nightmares. She's suffering so just cut her some slack whenever she sleeps with him. She's been through too much, the least she can do is sleep.

Until we meet again...

~T