[Previously]

Not Robin ✓
@Dickie-Grayson

This would be the perfect place to end a fanfiction but I feel like there's still plan0000s in the works

874.666 Retweets 707.769 Likes

[Four Years Earlier]

---- [T -> J] ----

T: Tell Dick I won't be able to make our tutoring session this week.
J: Who the fuck gave you my number?
J: And tell Dickie-bird yourself, Timbelina.
T: Shut up, Jasson, just tell him.
J: Fine.
J: Don't message me again.
T: Trust me, I wont

----

J: Coffee addict.
T: Smoker.
J: I can go longer without smokes than you can without coffee.
T: Bet

----

T: I'm not saying I hate u, I'm just saying I would unplug ur life support to make a pot of coffee
J: I didn't ask??

----

J: Here's how you can be certain I wasn't the one who tried to kill you; you're alive.

----

T: Why don't u go to the pharmacy, pick up something called Viagra, and GO FUCK YOURSELF!

----

J: Kill yourself.
T: Kill me urself u coward

----

T: What do u think would happen if I put coffee instead of milk in my cereal
J: It's 2am, fuck off.

----

J: You piece of shit! You played me!
T: Like the cheep kazoo u r
T: and what happened to "don't message me again"?
J: Shut up, don't get used to it.

----

T: Just stand over there and stay looking like a fool, k?
J: I'm blocking your number.

----

J: LOG OUT YOU UGLY BITCH.

----

T: STARBUCKS WISHES IT COULD BE GOOD COFFEE!
J: IT IS GOOD COFFEE!

----

J: What a basic white guy name, I feel sorry for any guy who's name is Tim.
J: Like, your parents honestly hate you and you should probably put yourself up for adoption.

----

T: Y is Babs chasing Dickie??
T: YO he's running for the stairs instead of the elevator!

----

J: Perhaps you'd like to slip into something more comfortable for your birthday? Maybe a coma?

----

T: Is ur learning curve a flat line or what?
J: Here the fuck we go, I hope you're ready to die
T: Have been for years

----

J: Can you not talk? For once? Forever? Can you fucking do that for me?

----

T: Congratulations, u can count. And they say the school system is failing.

----

J: Execute yourself.

----

T: BITCH HOW R U! UR JUST AS DUMB AS I AM

----

J: I'd love to continue this, but I've got to get up early tomorrow.
T: u could just off urself tonight and never have to get up again

----

T: Just like u getting released from prison, it makes no sense

----

J: boi, you r quite the snack
T: pls stop drunk-texting me, I honestly almost hate drunk-u more than sober-u

----

T: Dick and I were taking bets on how loud the noise of ur body hitting the ground was going to be

----

J: The reports of my demise were greatly exaggerated.
T: Unfortunately

----

T: Fix ur fucking edges, honey, I don't have time for u

----

J: You can tell she's morbidly depressed, like look at her her face.
J: Like, look at her, that's one suicidal queen.
T: Oh, so now we're gossip buddies?

----

T: That guys way hotter out there y's she getting with this nonsense?

----

J: can you please fuck off?

----

T: Hysterical

----

J: What are you looking at?
T: omg this plant was in animal crossing
J: I regret asking

----

T: THAT'S A LIE. HE JUST WANTS TO CELEBRATE HIS BIRTHDAY IN A CAVE. WITH CANDLES, COFFEE, AND MCR.
T: Sorry, Dick took my phone

----

J: Are you a morning person or a night person?
T: Buddy
T: I'm barely even a person

----

T: Do you ever get like... water hungry?
J: Thirsty?
T: Water hungry
J: How long have you been awake?
J: Actually, why are you texting me? Go off yourself

----

J: In the name of Jesus Christ, I bind and rebuke you, biTCH.

----

T: What if Cinderella was a baking slave instead of a cleaning slave and her name was Mozzarella?
J: I'm pretty sure I told you never to text me again.

----

J: The only reason you don't read women's health magazine is because you know they would call you out on your shitty self-destructive habits.

----

T: boi if u dont keep my name out ya mouth

----

J: What the fuck are you doing on your phone?
T: What the fuck are u doing with that haircut?

----

T: Tell me, whats it like to be such an idiot? I'm curious to know

----

J: What if they eat my brains?
T: It'll be a light meal

----

T: Touch my coffee and I will personally insure that you never have a moments rest again in ur LIFE

----

J: What time do you usually go to bed?
T: 10:30ish, sometimes four

----

T: Whats ur problem?
J: I dont know, but I'm sure it can be traced directly back to you.

----

J: I hate you.
T: Wow, we have so much in common already

----

T: Fuck u
J: When and where, bitch.

----

J: Can you pass the salt?
T: Can u pass ur classes?

----

T: I spy with my little eye... someone who needs to shut the fuck up

----

J: Go fuck yourself
T: Fuck me urself u coward

----

T: good morning, I regret to inform everyone it is in fact another fucking day

----

J: You need some makeup, fam. That shit is unsettling.

----

T: I hate you with every inch of my being.
J: That's not a lot of inches.

----

J: You just signed your death certificate.
T: and I dotted the i with a heart.

----

T: I wish Pokemon was real so I could move to the country and farm mareep in peace
J: They're called sheep, dumbass, look it up

----

J: What's that? I can't hear you with that pity-dick in your mouth. It's far too late for regrets, bitch.

----

T: Not that I care, but are u ok? That's a lot of blood
J: I'm fine. This isn't my blood.
T: Was that supposed to be comforting?
J: No

----

J: I can't fucking believe you set my coffee table on fire.

----

T: Do us both a favour and plz stop trying 2 be funny, k? Cause ur not
J: The fuck did you just say?
T: They're called abbreviations, dumbass
J: Sounds more like the death of language to me

----

J: fuck off

----

T: Okay- I know u dont care, but I'm like, gay-panicking because Robin just rescued me from falling off building and he's so attractive and oh my god he was so strong?? But like, he seemed different than usual??
J: You're right, I dont care.

----