Chapter Fourteen

It's a dark night once again, I sit on my window still with the small packaging placed in front of my feet; my arms hugging my knees.
The gloomily moon sends some light into my room, giving me enough brightness to read the words written there.

Benzodiazepine.

Attached, once again, a letter. It has waited all they for me to be read.

///
dear hyejin,

Please appreciate the gift I gave you, it was hard getting it. The lady at the pharmacy didn't want to sell them to me at first, I had to somehow fake this small form you usually get at a doctors office.

That's why you don't need much of it to see me, because it's that strong; almost like our desire to hold each other.

yours truly,

j.j.k
///

I wrote a letter to him even before I read his latest one, I was already holding it between my fingers, ready to place it on its usual spot. I put it there then stood up, to lay in my bed.

///
dear jungkook,

Please wait. I am thinking.

hyejin
///

And I am indeed thinking, almost every second of the night.

I hear the door of my room being opened, my younger brother peeking inside.

Hye, are you asleep?, he whispers with his voice filled with fear, can I come inside?

I shift to the edge of my bed, putting the blanket covering my body aside, come here.

It wasn't usual that I let my brother sleep in my bed, I have noticed that it has gotten more frequent that I did after I met Jungkook. He quickly scurries to my bed, hops inside and puts his head on my shoulder.

They are doing it again, he whimpers, they are screaming and cursing at each other again I even think that I heard mommy crying.

I pat his head softly, I am so sorry Yeol, I say, I'm so sorry mommy and daddy are like that.

I truly am sorry and I would forever be.