❀ Azalea❀

I rub my eyes with the back of my hand as I take out the keys to get into the mailbox of the complex.

Good Lord, Grey kept me up all night last night.

I pull open the box and go through the mail. Mostly they're all in Grey's name but there are a few magazines in my name.

I do a double-take when I see the University of Tennessee letter. I rush back to the apartment, walking as fast as my legs will let me.

I bust open the door like I'm in the S.W.A.T and Grey jumps spilling some of his coffee on the counter in front of me.

"Oh my gosh! Did I scare you?!" I smile happily. I can't believe I actually scared the unscareable.

"Ain't scared me," he grumbles unhappily, wiping the coffee from the counter. I place the mail on the counter beside him and then hold up the letter. His dark brown eyes trail over the envelope.

"I'm scared to open it," I tell him honestly. What if I don't get in? And if I do get in, I start so soon, a couple of weeks actually. That's terrifying to think about.

"Yeah well I'm scared to see your reaction once you realize you got in so let's get this over with," he motions for me to hurry the heck up. I open it carefully and slowly lower my eyes to the words.

Congratulations!

I fall to the ground and I start to cry.

Since I was little I always wanted to go to UTK and now I finally can. Now no one is stopping me, not dad. I feel Grey's body slide down onto the floor next to mine. He pulls me up onto his lap and hugs me tightly.

"I'm proud of you, Azalea," he wipes the tears from my cheeks, "you deserve this."

I sit up, wrapping my arms around his neck. I can't believe I've gotten so lucky. I have Grey and I'm going to college. This is everything I've ever wanted.

"Oh my gosh!" I pull away from him, "I need to tell Mr. Terrip! He's going to be siked!"

I throw my jacket off, hot from all the celebrating I've done in the past two minutes.

"Okay, I've got to go to work and do paperwork from the past two days," he kisses the top of my head.

"I'll come see you after talking to Mr. Terrip," we bid goodbye and I decide on taking a nice, calming bath to hopefully calm myself down from my hyper episode.

Before the bath though, I have a concert in the bathroom mirror. Then I stare at the letter while in the bathtub, effectively making the bath almost an hour long.

Once I'm out, I dress myself and decide on braiding my hair. Once I'm finished, I start the drive to the book store.

I get giddier and giddier just thinking about what his reaction is going to be. He's known for years that I've wanted to go to college.

I hold the letter tightly to my chest as I open the door. The bell rings over my head and a smile lights up my face.

He's not sitting at his desk so I figure he's somewhere hiding from me as he does sometimes.

Crazy old man.

"Mr. Terrip, come out of your hiding!" I call out, biting back a laugh when I picture him hiding behind a bookshelf.

I start walking around in search of him.

"Mr. Terrip, you sneaky old man, I have some exciting n-" I pause mid-sentence. My heart drops to my stomach. His frail figure lays on the ground in the back of the store, unmoving.

The letter in my hand drops to the floor and tears flood my eyes.

This can't be happening.

With shaky hands, I call 911. During the call, I struggle to maintain a calm voice. Once the call is over, I immediately call Grey. He answers within a second like always and I feel myself freaking out.

I don't know what to do.

He's not breathing.

"Hey, Lilah," he answers softly, "you on your way here?"

"Grey," I let a sob break my voice.

"Azalea? What's wrong?" I hear him start to freak out.

"It's Mr. Terrip," I hold the phone away from me as another sob shakes my chest.

"At the store? I'm coming baby," he speaks softly, "I'll be there in just a minute."

He hangs up and I'm left completely alone with my thoughts and just him.

"Mr. Terrip?" I bend down to his unmoving body, "please wake up."

I wipe the tears from my face, seeing that he has no reaction. I place my hand under his nose and he's still not breathing.

"Please, Mr. Terrip, you can't leave me too. You can't," I shake my head.

The only thing on Earth I want right now is for him so sit up and get mad at me for talking so much. I want him to talk to me about the new books that have just arrived and I want him to tease me for always going to get 'go-go juice' from the store down the street.

"God, please, don't take him away from me too, please," I close my eyes, praying as hard as I've ever done, hoping that it will work in the end.

I should've gotten here earlier.

The bell above the door rings loudly and multiple footsteps come running towards where I am. Strong hands grip onto my arms and I cry silently, not being able to take my eyes off of Mr. Terrip.

Jai and Roman lean down to Mr. Terrip, one of them pressing their fingers under his neck and the other checking for a head injury, I guess from when he fell.

Roman's face falls when he pulls his fingers away. That's when Jai moves to the side of Mr. Terrip, pressing his hands into his chest and pushing down in rhythmic moves.

I turn away from the sight, into Grey's chest and sob harder than I thought possible.

"We got him back," Jai rushes out as sirens begin to come closer. Relief floods my chest and I begin to calm even though I know this whole thing isn't over yet.

He was dead.

"It's okay, Lilah," Grey's hands rub up and down my back as he tries his best to comfort me.

~~~

I pace back and forth in the waiting room. Two hours and twelve minutes we've been here and we haven't heard a single thing. Grey leans up against the white wall beside me, watching as I pace back and forth.

"I'm scared, Sugar, I'm so scared," I feel my voice start to crack near the end. The guys went down to the Subway across the street to get food because the food here is just not okay. Abby's at work but she's coming as soon as she gets off.

"Come here," he opens his arms and I walk into them.

He tilts my chin up to him and with his thumbs, he wipes away the two little tears under my eyes.

"It's going to be okay," he tucks my hair behind my ears, pressing a kiss to my forehead. I take a deep breath to calm myself.

"Want to kiss mine too?" he questions and a little smile grows on my lips. I give him a nod and he bends down letting me kiss his forehead too.

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me," I tell him honestly, laying my head onto his chest. I feel him intake a breath and his heart speeds up a bit.

"You just made my heart speed up and made my dick tingle all at once."

I shake my head at his brutal honesty.

"Miss Carson?" A woman dressed in scrubs calls out and Grey and I both turn to her.

"If y'all would follow me," she offers a smile and we follow her. She leads us into an isolated waiting room that looks like it's only made for a couple of people, not a big one like we were just in.

"A doctor will be with you in just a minute," she closes the door behind her and Grey and I are left alone with each other.

I grow even more worried but also more anxious. The last news I heard was good news, he was alive. I hope this news is as good.

We wait for a while. Why is there so much waiting?

"Let's play a  game," I speak up, turning my body more towards Grey. He turns off his phone and looks at me.

"We say anything that comes to mind. But we can't repeat what the other person said and it has to be a real thing," I explain and he nods.

"Dingleberries," I start off.

"Azalea," he smirks.

"Mustaches," I continue.

"Azaleas," he tilts his head.

"Tennis shoes."

"Your ass."

"Ribbon."

"Your boobs."

"Perfume."

"Your legs," he places his hand on my thigh.

"Blankets."

"Your lips." Can he think of anything else?

"Umbrellas."

"Your eyes."

"Bear."

"Your other lips-"

"You better stop that!" I gasp and he smirks wider than ever. I can't do anything with him, I really can't.

I lay my head down on his shoulder, figuring it's probably best to refrain from playing these types of games with him.

A knock sounds on the door and I sit up, watching a middle-aged man in a white coat with a dress shirt and tie underneath enters the room. Grey and I stand to greet him.

"Hello, I'm Dr. David Adams," he gives us a nod.

"I'm Azalea," I shake his hand and Grey introduces himself, shaking his hand too. He takes a seat in the chair next to the couch Grey and I were sitting on and we sit back down.

"I'm the senior clinician here, and John Terrip's case was assigned to me," he explains and we nod, listening carefully.

"I'm afraid the news I'm here to tell you isn't good news," he begins gently. What does that mean? What kind of bad?

"John arrived here in cardiac arrest and we successfully resuscitated him. After testing, we determined he had a brain aneurysm which is what caused the initial stroke," he explains and I just feel my heart falling deeper and deeper.

"We took him to surgery as quickly as possible and did everything we could but unfortunately, he suffered bleeding to the brain from the ruptured aneurysm which led to the second stroke. I'm terribly sorry, but John died on the operating table."

I snap my head to Grey, wondering if he had heard the same thing I just had. I had to be hearing things.

Grey's eyes close and I watch as his jaw clenches harshly. He heard the same thing.

This can't be happening.

This is my fault too. If I wouldn't have thought about myself and my own excitement, I would've gotten to him sooner. None of this would have happened if I would have just stopped thinking about myself.

I rise my from my seat and dart out of the door in front of us.

I can't be in that room. It's too small. It's too filled with bad things, bad thoughts.

I run. I sort of run. I half jog out into the lobby of the hospital and I know I shouldn't run but I just want away from everything.

I hear Grey's deep voice shouting after me and I know he's going to end up following me.

Maybe I'm hoping to run away from the thoughts in my head or maybe I'm trying to run away from the man who tried to save Mr. Terrip, I don't know.

"Azalea?" I whiz past the guys who have bags of food in their hands and I don't turn back to apologize even though I know I should.

I try to push open doors that lead to a small outside balcony and the door is so heavy, it takes a lot of force for me to open it.

"Baby, please," Grey's voice speaks from behind me, "you're going to hurt yourself doing this."

I finally get the door open and I walk out to be met with the view of the small city in front of the hospital. Tears run down my cheeks at an almost unnatural speed and I'm breathing heavily. I feel Grey's presence behind me.

"I can't do this Grey," I breathe out and it's true. I can't do this. I went through Jake and it almost ruined me. Now Mr. Terrip is gone too.

What did I do wrong?

"He's gone," I whisper out, still not believing my own words. He's gone because I was so selfish.

"I should've been there sooner-"

He grips onto my arm and yanks me into his chest.

"I'm not letting you beat yourself up thinking that this is on you. It's not. Do you understand me?" I can tell he's not happy. He grips onto my chin and forces my eyes up to his.

"This was a health thing Azalea, not something you can blame yourself about. There was nothing anyone could have done."

"I know this hurts you so bad love, I know what he means to you, and it's unfair, so fucking unfair that things like this happen to you but you can't do this to yourself," he shakes his head.

"I can't sit here and watch the one person on earth I love beat themselves up over something that they couldn't control. It fucking kills me, Azalea," his eyes begin to well up.

"I'm sorry," I whisper, my bottom lip wiggling like it usually does when I'm crying.

"Lilah, you just can't do this to yourself, okay? You don't deserve it. You did nothing wrong, you never did," he pulls me farther into his chest and I cry into him.

~~~

Dear Azalea,

Unfortunately, this letter means something not too great. It means this old man is no longer there with you. I made a will not too long ago, because I'm getting old and all and I thought it would be a good idea since only the Lord knows what will happen in the future. Hopefully, this letter was delivered on time. I set the send-date to be exactly a week after I passed and if it didn't arrive on time, I'll raise hell (up here).

I want to start by saying I'm sorry. (When the time comes and I'm no longer here), I'm sorry for leaving you honey and I can assume that you're upset at me for doing so. Just know that once I'm gone, I'll be up in the sky with Mrs. Terrip, living out the years with her that she was gone too soon for. So don't feel sad. The last thing I want you to feel is sad darling and I'm sorry if this letter is making you feel as such. I'm sorry that I'd have left you after Jake and that you're probably torn up about my going.

You were the granddaughter I never had but needed. You meant everything to me, just know that. With your help at the store, it made me a happier man. You brightened up the store even though you didn't know it. That's another thing. You're oblivious to your powers. The power you have over people and the power your mind has over your heart. You think too much. Don't let your overthinking lead you somewhere you don't need to be.

Recently, little miss Azalea, you've met a man (not a boy, as you've told me). His name is Grey if I'm correct. You look at him like my wife used to look at me. I can see he doesn't quite look at you the way I looked at my wife though. I'm hoping that will change, which hopefully it will (I think y'all are just new in the "relationship). I'm not sure what's going to happen as of the date I'm writing this letter on, but in case his look toward you never changes, never settle for less. You deserve the world darling, not some fool who treats you wrong.

I can understand your confusion while reading this letter. Why would I write this? There was things I needed to say that I've never really been able to. Like how much I love you. You first met me when you were just a little girl. Almost every day since then you've come to help me and I can never thank you enough for everything you've done for me. I've never been able to tell you how strong you are either. You, dear, are the strongest person I've ever met. And the happiest. And the kindest. Don't ever let any of that change, it's what makes you, you.

I know throughout the years I was always a "listener" for you to talk to. I did actually listen to you (I know right, can you believe it?). I always listened to every word you ever said, even though sometimes I act like I didn't. No matter what I was there for you and even though I'm gone, that still doesn't change anything. You need a listener, I'm here honey.

Thank you for taking care of me all these years. Don't forget, I love you.

Love,

Mr. Terrip

P.S, I'll make sure to say hi to Jake, darling.

♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦♢ ♦

Y'all should have seen me writing this damn chapter. Y'all would think I actually knew Mr. Terrip personally. This chapter killed me. And I'm sorry I had to write it but since the beginning, I had it planned out that this was going to happen (I know that sounds terrible but it's true).

From here, I can say there will only be a few chapters left of this journey between Azalea and Grey. That also makes me want to cry. This story is by far my favorite out of the two I've written. I'm not gonna say I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter because I don't think there's much to enjoy about it but I hope y'all have had a good week.

*Not edited*

Word count: 3047

-Ashlyn Montgomery