One month later ~

104.7. That's what they've gotten me up to. I look horrendous. My scars are stretching with the weight gain and stretch marks are appearing on my inner thighs. I can't stand it. I feel so out of control. I don't want to die anymore, but I still am unhappy with life and my body. Things have only slightly improved with my piece of mind.

I haven't cut in 28 days if you can call that a good thing. Arlo is ecstatic over not only that but my weight gain as well. At least he's happy I guess.

I hear the doorbell ring and walk over to look through the peephole. Arlo. I open the door with a smile.

"What's up, buttercup?" he asks excitedly with a huge grin on his face. "Ready to go?"

"Totally!" I exclaim.

Arlo and I have a little date to the music store tonight. Nothing fancy, just getting some vinyls for his new record player. We start our little trek to Chrome Records.

"So, Gwennie..." Arlo starts.

"Yes, hun?" I implored.

"You're looking much better...and healthier. Your face is filling out beautifully, and I love that your body is just looking healthier. You're so beautiful," he confessed. He blushes a deep crimson.

"Arlo..." I'm at a loss for words. I can't believe it. This is the first time I've actually felt beautiful in years. Are things actually looking up for me? "Thank you," I tear up as I stop and swiftly wrap my arms around him.

He kisses the top of my head, "I love you, Gwendolynn."

"I love you, too, Arlo," I croak through tears.

He slowly leaves our embrace and takes my hand in his. He looks at me and says, "Come on, sweetheart. There's no time for tears today; it's a happy day." With that he lifts my chin with his other hand and plants his lips on mine. My cheeks flush.

With that we start back on our walk to the record store and reach it within minutes. As we walk in, something catches Arlo's eye, and he's running. I laugh a little and walk over to where he ends up.

"Babe, you won't believe it! They have it!" he shouted excitedly.

"Kill 'Em All by Metallica?" I ask.

"Yes, yes, yes!"

"Awesome, Arlo!" he's so cute when he's excited. I smile to myself.

"Are there any vinyls you wanted, Gwennie?" he asks.

I shrug my shoulders and ponder. I wonder.

"The Way of the Fist by Five Finger Death Punch maybe?"

"I'll go see if they have it," he replies.

As he walks away I start to think. I think about my future and the possibility of things actually getting better. I mean as long as I have Arlo and my now-caring mother, I think I'll be okay.

Arlo comes running back towards me, record in hand. "I found it!" he exclaims.

We go check out and start to head home, and I can't help but to think to myself about how much love I hold in my heart for this boy. Maybe things will be okay.

Author's Note ~

Well, this is the end y'all. I know I wrote this part awhile back, but I just re-read it and decided that I think this is a good stopping point. It's been a long and interesting ride. I started this book long ago with the hopes that it would help me get my feelings out, and I can proudly say it did exactly that. I started this book a little over two years ago, and I'm ready to let go. This part of my life is mostly over, and it's time for me to start the next book. Thanks for hanging around. Much love.