I suddenly throw my blades down. I can't do this anymore. I can't keep running forever. I burst into tears and slide off the toilet seat and onto my knees on the cold tile of my bathroom floor.

"Who the hell have I become?!" I scream into the night.

I grab my cell phone and pound Arlo's number on the screen and hit the call button. He picks up after the first ring.

"Gwennie, what's up?" he asks quizically.

"I can't do this anymore, Arlo," I sob into the phone. "I want to die."

"Gwennie, no. Don't say that. You don't mean it," I hear worry enter his voice.

"I mean it. I love you, Arlo. I've always loved you," the tears keep flowing.

"I'm leaving my house now. I'll be over as soon as possible."

He hangs up, and I collapse completely. I can't seem to stop sobbing. I'm running out of breath. Time is slowing down. 

---

I swear that only seconds have passed, but I awake in my bed and turn to see Arlo asleep in chair that he must have pulled up next to my bed. How long was I out?

I cautiously get out of bed, careful not to disturb Arlo, and make my way downstairs to the living room. I get there, and my mom is on the couch, drink in hand.

She turns and sees me, "Oh, Gwendolyn, I didn't hear you coming down the steps. Are you feeling better, honey?"

Honey? Since when does she call me honey? 

"Yeah, I think I'm okay now. I have something to ask you though, Mom."

"What is it?"

"Can we possibly find me a therapist?" my palms sweat in my panic.

She hesitates, obviously surprised by this question, "Um..Sure, honey. If that's what you need, then of course." She takes a swig of her drink. "I'll start looking around this afternoon."

"Thank you," I say genuinely. I walk over and give her an awkward hug. "I love you, Mom," I start crying again.

"I love you too, baby girl," her voice chokes.

Author's Note ~

Hello, all. I'm going to try and start wrapping this story up within the next 2-3 chapters. It's been almost two years since I started it, and I just don't connect with it in the same way. Anyway, I hope you guys are enjoying the happier turn this chapter took!