“Mummy,” Fire called gently, her arms akimbo. “What are we going to do now?”

Her mother’s gaze remained fixated on the wall standing before them. Her watery eyes shed a tear as she shook her legs continuously.

“Oluwafirefunmi, your father has left us. His mistress has given birth to a boy. He now has a son- what I couldn’t give him. This is where we are now oh! We have reached the bridge and I don’t know how we’ll cross it.”

“Ah!” Fire removed her hands from her waist and folded them across her chest.

“We may have to avoid this bridge, Fikayomi.”

Fikayo turned to her mother sharply, blinking rapidly to stop her own tears.

“Ah mummy! Lai lai, we will cross this bridge. We must cross this bridge!” Fire’s voice rose.

Her mother jumped up from the sofa and yanked her Ankara scarf off her head. She moved to Fire.

“Kí lo fé kin se. Oluwafirefunmi, answer me, how do we cross the bridge? Where do I get one million naira to pay Fikayo’s school fees? Too ba mo, your father is gone. Gone!” she yelled, tears running down her face.
“He is gone,” she screamed, putting her hands on her head.

She paced the living room, crying and lamenting. All the while, Fikayo sat still, staring at the spiral design on the tiled floor.

“Mummy,” Fikayo called in a low voice, lifting her head to look at her mother’s tear stricken face.

Her voice shook and tears welled up in her eyes yet she felt an overwhelming peace.

“Calm down.”

Her mother stared at her in disbelief, shaking her head.

“Lai lai, lai lai oh, tèmí bá mi oh,” she cried, taking fistfuls of the hem of her dress as she bent.

The next moment, she was on the floor, her legs spread wide apart. She rubbed her thighs back and forth as she screamed like someone in severe pain.

“Tèmí bá mi ! I am doomed.”

“Mummy, you’re not doomed. God is in control,” Fikayo said, standing up. She went to her mother and knelt in front of her.

“Mummy, please take it easy. We’ll find a way,” Fire chipped in.

Fikayo grabbed her mother’s hands from their motion on her thighs and held them tightly.

“I know you are worried and afraid. I am too. Over this week, I have thought and prayed about this. I want to go to Babcock but it is obvious dad-“

She let go of her mother’s hands and covered her face with her palm to hide the tears flowing out. She had not called him ‘Daddy’ since that day. There had been no reason to do so. Now, the word was too heavy for her tongue to roll out. The pain that accompanied the memory was a heavy weight to bear.

“Fikayomi,” Fire was by her side in a second, holding her to her chest. “I am so sorry,” she whispered, her voice shaky and low. “I am very sorry.”

***
Her phone rang and she picked it up from her side. Her heart’s pace increased as she saw the caller ID. She swiped to accept the call.

“Hi Ike,”

“Hey Fiks, what’s up now?”

“I’m fine,” she stated simply.

“Are you sure? You don’t sound so good.”

“I’m fine, Ike, thank you,” she tried to sound cheerful to avoid any more questions.

“I’m good, thanks for asking,” he said in a sarcastic tone.

She gave a short laugh.

“Ike,”

“Ogini?”

She chuckled lightly.

“Don’t start with your whack Igbo.”

He laughed.

“I think you even know more Igbo words than I.”

She smiled, playing with a strand of her tightly coiled hair. “Of course, I do. Don’t try me, inugo?”

She felt her mood lift some more as he laughed again. In a way she could not explain, his laugh was soothing to hear. It calmed her and raised her spirits.

“Yes, ma”

Silence ensued for a few seconds before he broke it with a question.

“Do you know Ify?”

Her brows furrowed as she tried to remember.

“Ify? No. Who’s that?”

“She’s in the teen’s choir, dark, short, she has tiny eyes.”

“I’m not sure I know her,” she shook her head, even though he couldn’t see her.

“She is also going to Babcock. In fact she got her admission letter this week, three days ago or so. Have you gotten yours?”

“Um,” she hesitated, contemplating on whether to tell him or not. If she did, he’d expect that she resumed and when she doesn’t he’d want to know why.

“Are you there?”

“Um yeah, I was admitted.”

“Really?” excitement bubbled in his voice. “Congratulations. I’m so happy for you. Did they give you your first choice?”

“Yes, Computer science.”

“My department! That’s really great. I am so happy for you. You have no need to worry, you will enjoy school. I will try my best to ensure that.”

“Look Ike,” she cut in sharply, her voice heavy with sadness and anger.

“I got admission but I can’t go. My mum is not financially capable for the fees. My da-“

Tears welled up in her eyes. She sniffed.

“Fikayo, are you okay?”

Her tears were uncontrollable. She felt embarrassed so she cut the call. Her phone rang minutes later, Ike calling back. She picked up the third call, wiping her eyes with a hand while the other held the phone to her ear.

“Fikayo, are you okay?” concern was evident in his voice.

“Fikayo, listen-“

She cut in, “I’m sorry for hanging up on you. My mind is a mess right now. I can’t-“

It was his turn to cut in.

“It’s okay, Fikayo.” He cleared his throat. ”I have never heard you speak about your dad.”

She was silent, her tears having now subsided.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it,” he added in a soft tone.

She opened up to him; cropping the sexual abuse her father had put her through and her smoking addiction out of the story. He said nothing until she spoke her last word. Thankfully, she did not break down.

“You are so strong, Fikayo.”

She gave a brittle laugh.

“You think too highly of me. First, I am pretty now I am strong. I know how weak I am, Ike. You don’t know the whole story. If you knew what I have done, who I used to be, you wouldn’t utter such words. I have treaded dark paths, Lolu.”

“You know what Fikayo? I don’t think you’ve forgiven yourself...for whatever it is that you did in the past. You said I don’t know who you used to be. News flash, I don’t need to know. All I know is God doesn’t hold it against you, so who is Ikechukwu to hold it against you? Even if I or anybody else holds it against you, it doesn’t matter. God has forgiven you but you need to forgive yourself and everyone who hurt you, Fikayo, to truly bloom into who God created you to be.”

“Fikayomi,”

“Yes,” she responded, blinking back her tears. The truth in his words hit her hard. She needed to forgive herself...and the people who had hurt her.

“I never said you are pretty. I said you are beautiful.”

She blushed, grateful he couldn’t see her now.

“And you need to believe it, too.”

***
She went back home with the Nnadi’s after Sunday service. They sat at the dinning to a meal of white rice and turkey stew. After wiping her plate clean, she rose to take it to the kitchen. Pastor Nnadi’s voice stopped her.

“Fikayo, we want to have a brief talk with you.”

“Just drop your plate, Kosi will wash it. Let’s move to the living room.” Mrs Nnadi said.

Kosi pouted and grumbled, her face scrunched up in displeasure. Mrs Nnadi gave her the stink eye before rising and pushing back her chair. Her husband rose also and she followed their lead to the living room.

“Sit here, love,” Mrs Nnadi patted the space between her and her husband after they had settled down on the leather sofa.

She lowered her form into the space.

“Baby, do the honours,” Pastor Nnadi said, smiling at his wife who grinned in return. She wondered what they were up to.

“Fikayo, Ike told us you got admitted into Babcock, congratulations. We are proud of you.”

They wouldn’t call her aside just to congratulate her on her admission, would they? And why had Ike told his parents when he knew she wouldn’t end up going? She frowned, slightly pissed.

“Thank you, ma”

“Well, we’ve decided to support you with your school fees.”

Her heart raced with excitement. She widened her eyes in utter shock, kneeling and thanking them profusely. Pastor Nnadi tried to raise her up but she refused, her heart beating tunes of great joy.

“I can’t believe this!” she muttered. “Oh my God, thank you so much sir. Thank you, ma. I can’t thank you enough. Whatever you give me will go a long way. I can’t express my gratitude enough.”

“I don’t think you understood us well,” Pastor Nnadi said. Fear rose up within her.

Didn’t he mean they were going to give her money to help with her school fees?

“We are going to pay your full school fees and by the grace of God, we’ll continue to do so.”

Fikayo let out a deafening scream as she rose from her kneeling posture and jumped in excitement. Her heart swelled with joy at the too-good-to-be-true news.

Kosi and Ike walked into the living room, confusion on Kosi’s face and a knowing smile on Ike’s.

She bent to hug Mrs Nnadi and her husband, one after the other. As she straightened up, she feared her cheek will hurt from smiling for too long. She engulfed Ike into a tight embrace and he wrapped a hand around her waist. She pulled out of the hug with eyes watering with happy tears.

...
Awwn is all I can say. Ike is cute 😭. May this ship not sink o.

Listen to the song in the media. You'll love it!

Thank you for reading!