It's the longing to talk to him. To tell him that I have feelings too, about him.

Or to even wonder if he even has feelings. What if Sarah was lying? And how would she even know anyways?

He hasn't talked in over his week of being away.

He hasn't called.

He hasn't picked up the Teen Help Service phone.

And the waiting is tearing me apart.

I just need him to say it'll be okay. Because the feeling is nice, you know, to know, even if it might be fake, that someone cares.

Will it make it better if I just stop caring?