[static noises][thumping]

SLIP: Is this thing on? Discus, are you sure this thing works?

DISCUS: [muffled dialogue]

SLIP: Fine. I'll try it. Hey. Sorry about that. Discus can build just about anything, but that doesn't necessarily mean it works. I'm Slip Henderson. I'm twenty-one years old and I'm a thief, broadly speaking. I prefer to think of myself as a specialist; I do what it takes to get what I want, then get the hell out of there. I'm making this tape so if I ever have a kid or an apprentice (or whatever you want to call it) they can listen to this tape and learn from it.

First rule of learning with me: don't try to find out my name. If you come in and want to train with me, don't even tell me your name. Chances are my team and I play dirty enough to where if you steal something and the police ask us if {insert your full name here} stole it, we're going to say yes and lead them to your hideout. One less thief in our way. I don't even trust them with my real name. Anyway, moving on. Second rule: don't double-cross me. The explosives guy we had before Trigger was Rightie, and he tried to blow Face and Angel off the face of the planet. Let's just say I was there. With a gun. By the time that heist was finished, we had $11,000,000 and a dead body in the back of the truck. Third rule: do everything I say. I once trained this kid who wanted to do things his own way. He's out in Rosehill Cemetery. Permanently. Trust me; I know what I'm doing. Fourth rule: be decisive. You get in a situation where it's either kill a guy or get caught by the police, just kill the guy. The kind of work we do, the charges won't be that much heftier. And fifth rule: take anything you want, but do it right.

And now, for your first lesson, I'm going to tell you a story of how we did (and didn't) follow these rules.