Poem written 21 May, 2016

~~~~~

You can grasp the honeyed warmth of

childhood,

the fluttering lark of your ambition,

swinging from tree branches that will soon subside into

nothingness,

into concepts you have not yet explored.

You will sputter with protest,

furnished by the froth of ignorance,

crying that you have explored it all

when you know nothing of

anguish,

of gasping on the bathroom floor

whose tiles aren't nearly as cold as you,

treasures that await the dark side of your youth.

Surely you have explored so much!

Alas, you are forever this child,

and as this child you explored the dips and turns of the

trees

and the dips and turns of your very

bones.

conviviality the marrow too sweet to

swallow.

But who knew that you,

a playful enchantress,

would become the bitch of melancholy?

Sadness is so solitary that it does not need you,

and it must be conflicting,

because you feel so empty,

when in reality,

it's just sadness' vacancy,

and you are safer than you think.

And as you glance past the dinner parties of people caged by

taxes and politics,

you laugh because that is not you.

And then your approaching wilderness laughs

because you are caged by something greater.

Something that will snatch you from the bed of joy

and throw you to the rain-slicked streets.

Something that will ensure that you catch against

the vindictive pebbles whose wit is sharpened by the rain.

Something that will invade your head

and leave the blame to yourself.

Because with taxes and politics,

the government is at fault.

But with demons and stones,

there is only you.

Weep, child,

weep!

For your branches are

snapping!

And your bones are

breaking!

You have no companion

besides the demons in your mind,

but even they have dug a grave to escape you.

You are brittle in your neglect yet more so in your

knowledge,

but isn't this what you wanted? To

explore ?

Are you just now finding that the peak of your exploration

is sobbing behind a silhouette striding undisputed

through the halls of other people's obliviousness?

What about cracking your arm like a twig

falling from those twigs in an ascendent betrayal?

Do you not deserve

more ?

Well you explored,

and now you are ignorant to happiness.

And you are so bare that you aren't even sorry.