I rested my forehead against Mason's shoulder, sighing heavily. I just wanted to sit here and wallow in self pity for the rest of my days. I clenched the fabric of his name brand sweat shirt in my fists, using it to dab my wet eyes.

     "You gotta help me, Mason!" I whined. I wasn't being over-the-top or dramatic at all in the way I said it, either.

     Mason snorted. "How many times do I have to tell you- ask Ophelia for boy advice, not me."

     Ophelia- the other member of our weird social triangle that had began in the beginning of our college years.

     "But she wouldn't understand! She's a girl and doesn't understand my manly needs," I protested.

Don't get me wrong. I fricking loved Ophelia! She's like the bomb.com, I swear. But she was an innocent child of God who could not be bothered with my smexy troubles. Her ears would literally bleed if I told her what situation I had gotten myself into this time! And she didn't have a d*ck. To fully understand what I was going through, you had to have a d*ck!

     Mason had a d*ck. Therefore I was now using him not only as a human tissue, but as my temporary shrink.

Mason sighed. "What are you even talking about? 'Manly needs'? Are you high or some sh*t?"

     Okay, now I was offended! Just because I was trying to express my distressed emotions in a very emotional way did not mean I was high! I probably had three too many iced coffees, but that was besides the point! It wasn't like I was screaming at him with mascara streaming down my cheeks. (Sometimes Ophelia can get like that.)

"No, I'm not high! Manly needs as in... as in you know..." I made a humping motion.

Mason blinked at me before bursting into laughter. I pouted. This was not a matter to laugh about! This was serious!

      "Why don't you talk to one of your gay friends about your gay sex?" Mason finally got out after he got all the giggles out.

     I glared. "Dude. You and Ophelia are like my only friends. Which I still don't understand, since you're an a$$ hat and Ophelia's a prude."

     And I said that in the nicest way possible.

Mason rolled his eyes. "Okay, whatever. Now what's wrong with your love life? Tell me, since apparently I've been promoted to being Dr. Phil or whatever."

I huffed. "Well, unlike you, I'm not repulsive. Cough cough, shave the f*cking peachy ferret fuzz on your face you call a beard, cough cough. But anyway, as I was saying... I've got... Like... Two guys that like me? I don't know why. Probably because they think I'm easy. Am I easy, Mason? Like, if you were into dudes, would you think I'd be an easy lay? I'm not, am I? But what if that's not the problem? What if I'm just playing hard to get too much? Like, I kinda shut them down the other day when they came on to me and tried to make me their sl#t. Do I just look like the sl#tty type or something? Or am I just overthinking this? I don't think I am! I mean, I think I'm being perfectly reasonable, especially in the fact that I denied them. I literally just broke up with Danny the f^ckface like two and a half weeks ago. I'm accustomed to my several weeks, sometimes months, to get over my sh*tty ex's before I move onto another! Well, in this case others. Does that make me polyamorous? Yeah, I guess it would... Dude, what would the sex even be like? Like, it wouldn't even be fair! I'd either get screwed by them both at the same time- ow, my a$$ is quaking at the thought- or they'd have to take turns! Which would honestly be a lot. I mean, I can have a lot of stamina, but after two rounds I'm pretty spent, man, Like-" I was going to continue before I realized I was talking about as fast as an auctioneer and making literally no sense.

Mason blinked, trying to absorb all the information I had just spilled. I pursed my lips, waiting for his response. If he even had one.

    "Okay... So let's start off with your initial worry. I personally don't think you're easy. And you're not a tease, either. I mean, it's not like you're bending over in front of them in some skanky get up, asking them to f*ck you, then denying them," Mason said.

I froze, my cheeks burning. I kind of did that, didn't I? I didn't ask them to f^ck me, but I had bent down in front of the two of them on several occasions. Did they misinterpret that and think I was trying to get a reaction out of them? F*ck.

     Mason's eyebrows rose and he gave me that look. The one saying 'did you seriously?' He probably thought I fingered myself in front of them or something! F*ck.

     I let out a low pitched whine. "Mason, it wasn't like that!"

     "Suuuuure. Dude, you're a dude! You know how it is when someone you like and think is hot does something. Doesn't matter if it's the most innocent thing every done, guys will take it the wrong way," Mason said.

     Ugh. He was right. I pinched the bridge of my nose.

     "What should I do, May?" I asked, my voice barely above a hoarse whisper.

Mason sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Do you like them?"

    Oh f%ck. Did I like them? Or was I only considering us having a relationship because they're hot? I'm not that shallow. Or am I? Fuuuuuuuuuuuck. I was pretty sure I liked them. Mark was sweet and funny, and Thomas was... I don't even know. But I did know that there was something about him that had me wanting to drop to my knees in front of him.

    "Yeah... I think so..." I said softly, sniffling.

Mason nodded. "Then just tell them that, but say you aren't ready for a relationship just quite yet! Problem solved. Maybe I should be the new Dr. Phil..."

I giggled, wiping my eyes yet again. "Thanks, May. I needed that. What does Dr. Phil even do, though?"

"I have no idea. Never seen the show. I know he is like a therapist? I think? No clue," Mason smiled.

     I rolled my eyes, smiling a bit myself. "Do you think it would suffice to just call?"

     Mason raised both eyebrows. "Are you kidding me? H*ll to the naw, b*tch."

—•—

My teeth dug into my bottom lip. My heart was pounding against my chest and I about decided to just leave. But no... I wasn't a p*ssy. I lifted my fist, ready to knock, when the door swung open. I was greeted with the slightly frightening sight of Thomas.

Thomas, as always, had that dictating feel to him. All his features were sharp, fierce, and just a bit scary. He was shirtless, only dressed in a pair of slacks. My eyes practically glued themselves to the sight of his muscular torso, a smattering of tattoos spread across the expanse of his bare skin. And when his cold blue eyes fell on me, I just about p*ssed myself.

D*mn. He might be terrifying, but he could still give me a boner like that.

"Hi," I squeaked, my face turning a shade similar to the coloring of a strawberry.

I wasn't going to lie. I sounded like a preteen girl who had her diary stolen and spread across the internet or some sh*t.

Thomas's face remained still, his deadpan expression not changing. He sighed. "Hello, Keenan."

God, I could have just c*mmed all over myself. His smooth, deep voice sounded like heaven when my name rolled off his tongue. I swear. I couldn't help but imagine all the sexy things he could tell me to do as I crawled around on my knees at his feet.

I shook my head, stopping my sexual fantasies there. "Is Mark home? I want to talk to you both."

Thomas sighed before pinching the bridge of his nose. It almost seemed like my very presence annoyed him. Ouch. "Mark! Get your fat a$$ out here! Now!" He hollered.

I heard a fair amount of grumbling and clattering coming from Mark's room before he stuck his head out. "What the f*ck is it? I'm trying to watch some good por- Oh. Hi Keenan."

I flushed again, heat rushing throughout my body. "Hi Mark."

Mark stepped out into the hallway, making his way towards the door. Unlike Thomas, he was fully dressed, although in a fairly simple getup. Still, he made the plain T-shirt and sweats look look hawt.

    "What was it that you needed again?" Thomas asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

     F*ck. Here goes the hard part...

     "Oh, yeah. I just wanted to... to apologize to you both. I stormed off and left things on not-so-good terms with you guys. I want to patch things up and hopefully fix some bridges I burned," I said meekly, my head hanging.

I prepared myself, waiting for one of them to scoff and tell me to f*ck off, but they didn't. Peeking up from my lashes, I saw them staring at each other, almost as if they were having an internal conversation.

"So... What do you guys say? I can order some pizza..." I offered, smiling half heartedly.

Mark pursed his lips. "Did you at least think about our offer?"

     My pulse just stopped. Of course I f*cking thought about it! That was like the stupidest question of all time. Couldn't he see that I was practically soaking my panties for them? God, men are so oblivious! (AN: Just so you know, I'm trying to be ironic here... Please don't get offended and kill me! I know my humor sucks!)

    "Y-Yeah. Yeah, I did..." I stammered, wiping my sweaty palms on my jeans. I then just stuffed my hands in my pockets.

     Thomas raised a brow. "So?"

     What the f*ck is that supposed to mean?

     "So what?" I blinked, kinda totally confused at that point.

    Thomas sighed, crossing his arms. What was that, the fifth time he had sighed at me? Kind of offended over here! "So have you decided whether to give us a chance?"

    I swallowed, wetting my lips with my tongue. "I-I'm not quite s-sure yet... Am I f-fired?"

     Mark coughed into his fist. "We're asking you whether you want to be our boyfriend or not, and you ask about your job? Real smooth Keenan."

      Oh f*ck. Boyfriend? Not just side sl#t?

    I turned beet red. "Hey, I actually kind of liked working here for you guys, you know! That's also one of my concerns. If we got in a relationship, how would that affect me being your employee? Another one of my concerns is dating two people that most likely are in a gang?! Kind of hot to read a smutty one shot about, not so hot if it puts my life in danger."

    As soon as I finished, I wanted to kick myself in the balls. Now they knew I knew they were in a gang! And they can't have little freaks like me running around on the streets, knowing their names and what they look like! Now they'll probably snuff me out and dump my body in the bay.

    Thomas shot Mark a look. "Listen, there's a lot we need to go over. How about we talk it all out over some pineapple pizza?" Mark eased in.

    Yep. They're definitely going to kill me. And they're definitely murderers! Who the h*ll eats fruit on pizza?

    "Sure!" I managed.

    This was going to be a loooooooong night.

~So hi guys... I know it's been a while, but hey, I feel like this was an okay sort of chapter! Question of the day is... What's your favorite pizza topping? Tell me in the comments below! Also, those hotsies up at the top are the Dolan Twins! Go check them out if you don't already know them! (I'm lowkey obsessed with them) Lots of love, don't forget to vote if you enjoyed!~