I'm not really a romantic guy but i really want to right down what i think about someone. The girl i'm dating right now. 

It's kinda hard to explain how i feel for her. i feel like i couldn't do without her. talking to her is the highlight of my day.

Sometimes, i sit up at night just thinking about our conversations. i think about her beautiful smile. i think about the way she is so shy around everyone. I think about i nearly lost her. Let me tell you a story.  This is the perfect place to tell it, right?

I fell in love with a girl in November of 2017. I loved her to the point i ignored everyone else. i thought she loved me the way i loved her. Four months after we started dating, she left me. i went through two months of suicidal thoughts and depression.

After she left, i went through two relationships in two months. i was so scared of being left again, i would leave before they could leave me. Then i met my gf.

She told me she had loved me for a while. she said she sat on the sidelines for a long time. she said she was in pain because she loved me but she couldn't have me. she said she wasn't going to wait anymore. She said i was hers now. Here we are, three months later, and what she said is true. i'm hers and she is mine.

But how did i nearly lose her? Sit back down and hush and i'll tell you. about two week after we started dating, i was gonna leave. but she begged me to stay. she said she loved me and she couldn't do without me. i wasn't scared of her leaving anymore. well, i got scared one more time. i told her that i was constantly afraid of her leaving me. she told me she spent too many nights crying over me to leave. she said she couldn't do without me and that she loves me too much to leave.

She is one of the people that keep me going.

She is so shy. It's adorable to me. I love how she blushes constantly. i love her smile. I love thinking about having her in my arms. i love being with her.  She makes me feel complete.

To my gf, you know who you are. I love you so much.  You've helped me heal. I didn't think i could love again. But i love you. I was depressed before. I'm so happy with you. *blows a kiss* thank you for staying with me, sweetie. I love being with you. Even when you are being stubborn.