I'm disgusting.

I'm so fucking disgusting, that the thought of myself actually repulses me.

The reflection staring back at me as I stand in the middle of my room almost tugs at every flaw visible, every time I got knocked out on the floor, every hit I received, every punch I threw, every word I said — picking at every line and bump, and bruise, and scar on my my entirety.

It's disgusting.

Disgusting. Disgusting. I'm disgusting.

I don't want people to see this. I don't want you to see this — this monster.

My mind is brimming with the noise of my thoughts but I can't hear a thing. I'm desperate to cling onto anything that triggers something to destroy this nothing clawing inside of me. I'm gasping, but it's all exhales. I'm crying, but it's all exhales. I'm dying, but's all exhales.

How do I continue this battle?