I'm so mad at myself.
I feel like I hate myself instead of hating you
and I don't know if that's possible because I convinced myself
that I was over you and now I know it was all pretend.
I pretended that I didn't look at you when you didn't notice I was.
I pretended not to light up
When you entered in the room.
I pretended not to upset
when we got in the fight
I pretended I didn't look forward
To seeing you everyday.
I pretended that I wasn't hurt
when you broke my heart.
I pretended I didn't miss you
When you didn't come around.

Now all these lies have showed me is that I miss you so much more than I had realized.

****

Dedicated to all heart broken soul

Specially my dear friend FierceFreshFabulous