i'm procrastinating my work,
and putting off progress.
i'm ruining my life again
in a long game of chess.

i left my king unguarded,
and stood it still did.
life snarled with smile:
"it's me you can't rid."

and then i tried to fight back,
with overcomplicated moves.
therapy, meds, being 'open' for once.
well shit, nothing's improved.

so now i'm back in my limbo
of confusion and being lost.
i'm ruining myself again -
this time, what's the cost?