It was almost like a ghost had come back, haunting the lives of the ones who once loved them and becoming the beacon of reminder of a life lost—only it wasn't a ghost. It wasn't some apparition or trick of the light, but a little girl with the blackest hair and eyes the color of spring trees.

Sachiko looked so much like her it scared him.

Naruto paused his work, his hand hovering over the mouse pad of his laptop as he looked to the side with a guilty grimace.

Her.

When did Sakura become just her?

He glanced down at that hovering arm. His memory flashed and for a moment—a brief, agonizing moment—his hand was covered with the warm slick of blood all the way up to his elbow as his skin met meat, bone, puncturing all the way through—

She wasn't breathing and she was bleeding out so profusely that her blood was pooling around their knees. Tears started to drip down his cheeks as he called out her name like a prayer.

Naruto covered his mouth with his other hand and spun towards the window behind him and hurriedly slid the glass to the side. He sucked in the fresh air and tried to still his frayed nerves.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.

He... He hadn't had a memory like that since far, far before Boruto was born. Maybe even longer than that.

"Do you think she did what she did because she loved you?"

In fact, he realized with an even more drowning sense of guilt, he hadn't thought about her more than the best medic, his best friend, a hero.

... No.

"She wasn't a hero—she needed one! She was scared and alone and thought  she'd never be good enough! Why don't you know that?! You thought she sacrificed herself to peace? She didn't! No one saw she was tired! No one saw she gave up! Everyone thought she was okay but she wasn't!"

How long had she been that way? How long had Sakura—bright, cheerful, temperamental Sakura—been scared and alone? He should've been there for her, but all he thought was that she wanted Sasuke. Sasuke. Sasuke. His life was so centered around getting one of his best friends back that he was blind to what was happening with the other.

"Why didn't you help her, Naruto?! Why didn't anyone?!"

"I didn't know," he whispered. A tear trailed down his cheek as his voice cracked. "Sakura-chan, I'm so sorry, I didn't know, I'm so, so, sorry." He choked on his words. "You and Sachiko deserved so much more."

::

Sasuke admitted to it. He wasn't a good person.

He'd done so many regrettable things over the course of his life that he couldn't possibly make up, and he accepted the fact that he had to live with every single mistake he made until he was lowered into the ground. Leaving Konoha was one. Devoting the majority of his youth to revenge was another. Killing his innocent brother was at the top of his list. Letting Orochimaru culture his hatred was close behind. Wanting to destroy Konoha was a horrible decision, and so was trying to kill Naruto.

But if he really wanted to get down to it, one of the handful of events that truly shook him to his core was the accidental murder of one of the only people who refused to give up on him.

Haruno Sakura.

A heart was in his hand.

He hadn't meant to kill her. Of course he hadn't meant to kill her, he'd been aiming for Naruto, but he really hadn't meant to kill him either he just—he'd—it was only supposed to—

Her eyes were unfocused and torpid, staring up at absolutely nothing.

Sasuke sighed and dropped his face in his hands.

He was just one big fuck up, wasn't he? What the hell was he thinking back then?

"So what are you going to do? Strangle me? Stab me? Or are you going to kill me the same way you killed Haruno Sakura—by ripping my heart out of my chest?"

And there was Sachiko, someone completely unexpected and someone who brewed even more regret about Sakura and the horrors war brought upon even the most innocent of people.

Then Naruto told him that the accidental murder wasn't an accident at all.

Sakura had wanted to die, and his heart clenched at the thought. Once, when he was younger, he wanted to avenge the deaths of his family. His blood. But in the end, he just killed the ones who cared about him, didn't he?

::

Sachiko had been walking down a park trail with Pakkun when she noticed a small, furry body lying at the far edge against a rock. As she drew closer, she found it to be a kitten; brown, meowing faintly, and exposing a deep cut down its side.

"I know I don't like cats, but that's just messed up," Pakkun grunted, casting a sympathetic eye at the feline. "'Specially since he's only a baby. Hey kid, if we get him to the vet's quick enough we might be able to—

He stopped when Sachiko readily kneeled down on the dirt and inched towards the fallen creature. "I-I can help him. I think. The wound's not too deep if I just..."

His jaw dropped slightly when her hand started to glow a crystalline green shimmering in the sunlight as she mended the kitten's skin until nothing but a pale pink scare was left. Healing the stray, just like that. Wasn't this just a civilian girl?

She sat back on her heels and gently scooped up the little cat in her arms.

"Where'd you learn to do that, kid?" Pakkun questioned curiously. He poked her arm with his nose and she jolted slightly at how cold it was.

"I-I, um, I-I studied some basic healing b-back in my old village—"

"Did you?" a new voice queried. Sachiko nearly squeaked at who appeared at her side, tall and imposing with an air of authority she didn't dare questioned. Even the pug had taken a few cautious steps to the side. "The village you're from, I heard Kakashi say there weren't any shinobi that resided there. How exactly did you learn to collect healing chakra in your hands?"

"I... I..."

Tsunade crossed her arms. "Speak up, girl!"

"I pr-practiced myself!" she stammered. Her hands brought the kitten closer to herself as it nodded off at the relief of pain from its side. "I helped out a-at the clinic and made remedies and I... I just want to he-help people."

She shrunk under the scrutinizing gaze of the woman who was once her mother's mentor. She hadn't meant to get caught practicing medical ninjutsu along the street like this. All she wanted to do was go on a nice walk with one of Kakashi's summons and maybe get some ice cream before going to visit the war memorial. Though now, she recalled her mother's words on years-worn paper that detailed the exact person currently standing before her.

Tsunade-shishou was one of the strongest forces in my life. She was made of unbreakable steel and had a tongue as sharp as her wit. She was also the first person to introduce me to alcohol, can you believe that? Teaching a fourteen year old to win bar bets and how to throw back the meanest shots. She's a crazy woman, and I love her all the more for it.

After I asked her to train me, she pushed and pushed and pushed because she believed in what I would become. I didn't want to let her down, not after she lost so many others before.

I... I couldn't keep the promise I made to myself. I couldn't make her proud.

Please tell her I'm sorry. That I wasn't strong enough to continue on for her.

Tsunade eyed the girl for a few more moments before pointing a well-manicured finger her way. "Stand up."

Sachiko did. Then the woman looked at the little pug hanging awkwardly off to the side. "Pakkun, tell Kakashi she's going to be with me the rest of the day."

"Yes ma'am," he said. He nodded Sachiko's direction. "See ya, kid."

"B-Bye..."

He disappeared in a cloud of smoke, leaving the other two in a careful silence. Tsunade stared straight through Sachiko, observing every inch of her appearance, her expression—her soul, then promptly turned on her heel.

"Come on," she commanded. The girl held the kitten closer to her chest. "We're going to the hospital."

Not knowing what else to do, Sachiko swallowed down her fears and followed

::

Sachiko stared down at the dead fish on the table. Recently dead, actually. The net Tsunade made her catch it with was dripping at her feet, and the ex-Hokage herself was leaning against a pillar while holding the kitten and watching her every movement. She had no clue what was happening or why there was a small river running through the hospital's archives, but she couldn't will herself to question the instruction expected of her.

Resuscitate the fish.

Dutifully, she raised her hands, concentrated hard enough for them to glow that crystalline green she had earlier, and pressed it against the fish's side. Three seconds passed, then twelve, then twenty-two, then thirty.

And the fish began flailing on the metal table top.

Sachiko brightened at her success and quickly lowered the flopping fish back into the water. When she looked up, Tsunade had lost all the severity around her eyes and was staring at her with a sort of softness that certainly wasn't there before. She set the brown kitten down onto the floor and approached the young girl.

"Sakura wasn't able to do that the first time like you did," she said. "She certainly was faster than most, though it took her about a week even with her previous shinobi training. You did good."

Sachiko flushed at the praise. "Th-Thank you." She gazed back to the fishing net on the ground. "Um, so when my mother was your st-student, she was—um—she was advanced?"

"More than I expected," Tsunade admitted. "She came to my office suddenly when she was thirteen, you know, made a plea to become my student because she resolved not to fall behind Naruto and Sasuke anymore."

Her voice grew quiet. Distant, even.

"I saw that she was struggling. There were signs—scars, I... I wasn't convinced when she said she was okay, but I didn't do a damn thing about it. I'm sorry I could protect her, Sachiko. I was supposed to, but I didn't," she murmured. Red-painted lips were pulled into a guilty frown as she somberly regarded her old student's living legacy; a child who didn't grow up with stories of her parents' lives and their triumphs, but had to wallow in the dark until she learned her father was a man gone mad and her mother ended up a victim to both him and her own being.

Sachiko, on the other hand, felt her earlier elation flush away as it was replaced with a large hole in her chest. She knew she'd be angry, maybe she'd always harbor a small knot of resentment inside of her on behalf of her mother, but here was someone attesting for their wrongs, knowing what they did was wrong, and owning up to the fact that it was wrong. Tsunade hadn't helped her mother, but she knew that the woman only ever wanted to.

"My mother she... told me about her life here. Before the war," Sachiko started quietly. Tsunade's eyes flickered upwards. "She told me about the Academy, Team Seven, Orochimaru, your training, the war... everything. It w-was like her autobiography in my hands." The girl raised her head and met those sad eyes. "She wanted me to tell you that she was sorry. That sh-she couldn't make you proud and that she wasn't stro-strong enough for you."

The ex-Hokage was confused until her face abruptly twisted in pain and she turned to hide her expression. "She's the one telling me sorry? That little—what's—I'm—argh! That girl, I swear! She was one of the strongest brats I knew!"

Then her shoulders slumped forward, defeated.

"But she didn't believe me. Why couldn't I make her think any different?"

::

Naruto walked home alone that middle of the night, moon high in the air and a crick in his neck that he was trying to wriggle out. He'd just finished sifting through several mountains of paperwork and attended at least two meetings, if he remembered correctly. He'd be sure to catch up on his sleep this time, for a few hours maybe, before going to work tomorrow and have Shikamaru talk his ear off abou—

He stopped at the edge of the Fourth Shinobi World War memorial and peered at the bronze leaf statue. 'Why was Sachiko alone so late at night?'

That surge of guilt he drowned in earlier had resurfaced some, the sight of her standing there saddening him to his core. She shouldn't have to be able to be all on her own like that just like he'd done as a child so many times before. 

He knew what it was like to feel alone. Be alone.

Naruto pursed his lips and walked towards her. "It's kind of late, don't you think?"

She shied away when he neared, and that made his guilt soar even further as she tucked in on herself and gripped her upper arms. She was silent, and though he wasn't surprised, Naruto took a spot next to her a meter or so away and gazed up at the memorial.

"I hate me too. For what I did," he said. The stars twinkled overhead, shining in the darkness beside a moon whose light was almost too bright to love. "Sakura-chan... I... I can't forget about what I did to her. I thought all she wanted was for Sasuke to come back."

There was a beat of silence.

"... She didn't."

"She didn't," Naruto solemnly agreed. Sachiko finally raised her eyes and raked her stare over her mother's name carved in bronze and polished like it was carved just yesterday. 

"She told me..." Her bottom lip wobbled. "S-She wrote to me about you."

He almost flinched. "Yeah?"

"She hoped you would make your dream of becoming Ho-Hokage and that you'd lead the village in a way n-not seen since the Shodai's time, and..." Sachiko trailed off. She looked up and gasped, seeing tears flow freely down the Nanadaime's cheeks. He pressed the back of his sleeve against his face and tried to stifle the sorrows that didn't dare relent.

"She-She believed in me? That much?" he grieved. She could only stare. Here was a Kage hailed as a hero across the world reduced to sobs at the mere fact that his old friend thought he'd have a bright future.

Her heart shattered, messy and guilt-ridden.

Please, please don't hate them. They did nothing wrong.

"I shouldn't have ye-yelled at you. I'm sorry," she apologized. Naruto shook his head as he wiped his eyes.

"It's not your fault—"

"—No, I—"

"—It really—"

Their sentences were jumbled and their apologies melted into each other's for half a minute until they stopped and realized their words had turned into nothing but a sincere, nonsensical shamble. Small chuckles suddenly sprung from their lips as they understood what they were just doing: stammering over who was to take the blame.

They were a mess, weren't they?

"Sakura-chan would be laughing at us now for arguing like this, huh?" Naruto sniffed. "Sorry, sorry, just... can we start over? The two of us?"

Sachiko took some seconds, blinking through her blurry vision, before slowly nodding. He perked up immediately and stuck out his hand. "Then it's nice to meet you! My name's Uzumaki Naruto, the Nanadaime Hokage!"

His grin was as dazzling as the sun on a warm Konoha day and she slowly took his hand, a small smile blooming on her face.

"I-I'm Haruno Sachiko. It's nice to meet you, Hokage-sama."

::

To be continued in Stumble [Epilogue]

::

Here's an awesome fanart by this-is-troublesome !

And here are two wonderful covers by treeoh !