Beckett, one day, came back to my room with an envelope in his hand. For the first time in months, I saw him smile. I loved his smile. It was crooked, but so radiant. God would be stupid to only put his smile on one person.I hoped our childeren would have his smile. He said " Ev, you got in. You got in to freaking Juliard." I had gotten in. Suddenly, Beckett's smile faded. " Now you really have to come back Evie. I know how much you love the violin, so, please. Come back so that I can see you smile again, hear your beautiful music, kiss you again." I wanted, no, I needed to kiss him again.I needed to get better for him.Before I knew it, Beckett was leaving. He was going on tour in New york and might be getting a record deal. Before he left, he told me " Evie, I have to go for a little while, but just know that I love you, and i'll always be with you. Oh, and sweetheart, while i'm gone, no surprises." God, I loved him. I made my decision. It was a brutal one, but I think my parents and Tristan would be proud. I was coming back. I looked down at myself every day and thought, " How can I come back? I will never get to see my family again. I'm a traitor." It took me so long to realize that I wasn't a traitor, I just wasn't ready to let go of the one I loved most yet. one night, about a month after Beckett left, I was sitting next to myself and I heard some beeping. I saw a nurse run in and yell " I need a crash cart! She's going in to cardiac arrest!" Nononononononononono! I was getting married! I could feel myself being drained away. This couldn't be happening to me! What was the point of going through all that emotional and physical pain, especially seeing Beckett going through all this, if I was just going to die? I could see them trying to revive me, shocking me with paddles. I could hear one of the nurses calling my aunt Bee and uncle Ted, and then lastly Beckett. I could hear him half scream from the other end " What?! Okayokayokay.... I'm getting on the next plane there. I'll be there in about three hours." I felt like I was falling asleep. No! Not yet! I'm not ready! Don't take me away from him! It was too late. I saw a bright white light. That was it. I was dying.