---- [W -> D] ----

D: I don't need a valentine, I need a fight

----

W: Gimme a few days to get the money together

----

D: The recommended age to have an Ouija Board is 8+
D: So you need to be 19 to drink but 8 to summon the devil

----

W: Dating Tip: Hold the door for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.

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D: If you ever feel stupid or weak or powerless, just remember that I am not. And I'm out there, very dangerous, and looking for you. Good luck.

----

W: I can't take this long distance relationship anymore!
W: The fridge is coming to my room!

----

D: I bet you $20 that I can convince the team to cosplay as the Host Club
W: I bet you can't

----

W: Why are you grounded again?
D: The interview asked for three words to describe me
W: And...
D: I said: Boss Ass Bitch

----

D: Me? A jealous hoe? Absolutely.

----

W: Listen here short stack, this trash can ain't big enough for the two of us

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D: Barbara is that one female character who could literally beat me up and I would thank her

----

W: Feelings are terrible
D: 0/10 would not recommend

----

D: I can't tell if I'm really nice but secretly an asshole or an asshole but secretly really nice

----

W: How long will this go on for??
D: It can't be more than 30 chapters man
W: But we're still so far from canon!
D: Welcome to my world

----

D: Don't tell me to calm down I'll throw a fucking desk at your face

----

W: Today is a beautiful day
D: Not as beautiful as me

----

D: IF YOU EVER SEE ME FIGHTING IN THE FOREST WITH A GRIZZLE BEAR
D: HELP THE BEAR
D: CAUSE THAT BITCH GONNA NEED IT

----

W: YEET

----

D: I never said I didn't like you...
D: I said you are the fakest motherfucking slutty-ass bitch I've ever seen in my life
D: There's a difference

----

W: You get back here you bitch
W: You Get Back Here You Bitch
W: You Get Back Here You Bitch
W: yoU GET BACK HERE YOU BITCH
----

D: Hello and welcome to standing up school
D: ...
D: And you fail

---- [The Three Muskequeers] ---- 

R: Sup' sluts, guess who just got out of prison
W: Sluts?
D: Prison?

---- [W -> D] ----

D: You challenge one teen pop-star to a drag race in Florida and suddenly everybody's talking

----

W: ┏(･o･)┛♪┗ (･o･) ┓
D: °\(^▿^)/°

----

D: Lets play cops and robbers!
W: Only if the guns are fake

----

W: How's it feel to be the worst cop ever?
D: Shut up, your aunt buys you mega-blocks instead of legos
W: You take that back

----

D: Hey Romeo
D: OH NOMEO

----

W: Hey okay dude
W: I was using your laptop today
W: And I checked your browser history
D: Okay I can explain-
W: It's just pages and pages of pictures of pasta

----

D: Heh, your ass just got looney-tooned

----

W: Hey what's your name again? I forgot...
W: It starts with a D doesn't it? Uhh
W: Is it... Dumb stupid bitch?

----

D: That watergun fight was more intense than the one in Free!
W: I will never forgive you for what you did
----

W: That's a nice vase there
W: It'd sure be a shame if
W: Someone were to
W: Break it

----

D: Okay, but what is Kyouya writing
D: For all we know, he could be Kira

----

W: First of all, language
W: Second of all, what the fuck

----

D: I just realized how Kalenacker was even at the space mall
D: This whole time, the show was making a jab at cow abductions and alien conspiracies
D: It only took me months to figure out

----

W: What are you doing here?
W: Five words or less
D: Out. For. A. Walk.
W: ...
D: ...
W: ...
D: ...Bitch.

----

D: Today I'm feeling cloudy with a change of sarcastic

----

W: You didn't name everything in the bathroom after bars too, right?
D: Of course not
W: ...
D: Ok, yes, there is batshampoo
W: ...
D: But there's also conditioner Gordon

----

D: Nothing is more satisfying than someone walking right past your hiding spot in hide n' seek
W: IT'S BEEN WEEKS WHERE ARE YOU

----

D: Do you ever see an opinion that's so terrible that you actually feel bad for that person's brain

----

W: Wheres your mask?
D: Where's Black Widows movie?

----

D: I give her a 6.2 for the effective ninja skills
W: I'll give her an 8.7 for the speed of which she managed that

----

W: I want to fight myself

----

D: Can you catch a turtle with superspeed?
W: ...What?
D: Can you catch it?
W: I guess...
W: What are you doing with a super speed turtle?
D: No idea
W: What are you going to do with it?
D: You want a crime-fighting flash turtle?

----

W: What's your blood type?
D: How would I know?
W: How would you not?!
D: Who do I look like, Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood groups?
W: You don't know your blood type but you know who discovered them?

----

D: If you can't say anything nice, you could say awful things instead. It's an option
----

W: let's do something really scary!
D: We could go to bed early and be alone with our thoughts

----

D: Your Monday morning enthusiasm is creating a hostile environment

----

W: Why can't you try my New Years revolution of being positive? I'm telling you, it's great!
W: For example, you see this glass and half empty but I see it as half full
D: But it's completely empty
W: But I see it as half full
D: And it's a bowl

----

D: You didn't think maybe we'd need some actual weapons?
W: Well, knowledge really is the best weapon
D: I'm pretty sure weapons are the best weapons

----

W: Dick, you can't just sit here in the dark and listen to classical music
D: I could have if you hadn't turned on the light and shut off my music

----

D: I take back 80% of the bad things I've said about you in the last hour

----

W: Wanna go throw rocks into the ocean with me?
D: Can we aim of Atlantis?

----

D: Good news, there's a charity event on tonight. I bet I could forge some invites
W: We just robbed the Tower of London, and now you want us to break into Buckingham place?
D: Well, it's really more fraud than breaking and entering
W: Make me a Count?

----