Grace's POV
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The first time I tried waking up, I couldn't breathe. There was just darkness around me and I couldn't breathe. My head was brimming with an intense pain and it felt like my lungs were on fire.

The second time I tried waking up, the burning pain was gone. It felt extremely hard to open my eyes though, almost as if an invisible force was keeping them shut. I felt way too exhausted to care about my surroundings.

The third time I woke up, things were a bit better. I couldn't feel the pain. The drowsiness was gone. When I managed to open my eyes, the lights felt too bright, so much so that a small inaudible wince escaped my lips. I took my time adjusting to the white light, not even sure where I was.

Then I heard the unmistakable beeping sounds of machines around me and a small groan escaped my lips.

I didn't like this place. Not even a bit.

"Grace?"

I closed my eyes back again, hoping that whoever it was would know that I wasn't conscious yet. I didn't want to sit up and talk to anyone. I didn't even want to remember why I was here –in a hospital– in the first place.

Maybe I was feeling like that because of the drugs I was on right now. I felt numb and I just didn't want to talk.

"I saw her moving a bit." The same person said in a scared, hushed whisper and I'm sure it wasn't directed at me. "I swear."

I heard a small shuffle and someone came to my left, warm fingers pressing against my wrist; checking my pulse.

I wasn't dead.

Why wasn't I dead?

"The pulse rate is...normal. I think we should wait a bit until she wakes up." This was an unfamiliar voice. "I'll go and call the doctor."

I opened my eyes once again and winced again at the bright light, this time it was loud and the only two people around me heard it.

"Grace."

I blinked twice before gripping the sheets over me and sitting up. I was kind of thankful that the nurse helped, or I was sure I would've fallen down again. My whole body felt like jello.

"Oh, thank God." I looked up and saw Alice. She wasn't covered in dirt and grime anymore, but she still looked as sickly pale with worry as she'd seem back...back there.

I refrained myself from looking around the hospital room. Besides me, it was just Alice and that nurse in the room. I think I despised hospitals more than anything.

Ironic that I always ended up here.

"How are you feeling, sweetie?" The nurse gave me a small smile.

I didn't smile back, though. I blinked at her in response. My mind felt blank at this moment, as if someone had literally sucked out all the thoughts, questions and emotions from it.

"I feel...numb." I heard my voice and realized that it was me who was speaking.

The nurse nodded and I looked back at Alice when I felt her gaze on me.

"That's just the Demerol." The nurse said. "Its effects will wear off in a couple of hours. All right, I'll check up with the doctor then."

Once she was gone, Alice sat down gingerly on the bed in front of me and spoke up, "Do you really not feel anything?"

I then noticed a small bandaid at the corner of her forehead. Something about the bright orange sweatshirt she was wearing right now made me feel a bit more lightheaded, in a good way.

"Yeah." I leaned back against the pillow and looked at the plain white wall in front of me. There was an unusual painting hung on the wall, with colors that really did not go along well.

I bet Luca could make this painting look better in just few minutes.

"Where's Frost." Just after speaking it, I realized that I didn't make it sound like a question. Maybe because I didn't want to make it sound like a question.

"He...He's with Marleen, I guess." Alice seemed a bit taken aback by that question.

Luca. Luca. Luca.

"Where's Marleen?" I think my voice sounded a bit strange now.

Alice looked back at me and I saw the sadness in her eyes. Such immense sadness that I had to look away from her, back at the plain white wall. I think I hated that sad look more than these hospital rooms.

"Can I see Frost?" I asked her.

I saw her looking down at her hands and she still looked sad. "You can, but I don't think they'd let him in here when you just woke up."

"Okay." I murmured.

We both fell silent for the next few minutes and I kept on wondering when the doctor would come inside.

"Are we just going to pretend that nothing happened?" Alice whispered, still looking down at her hands.

Pretend.

Was that what I was doing right now?

"I thought...I thought you promised me that you'll make it out of there." She continued. "And you didn't."

I shifted a little and felt a dull ache somewhere in my head. Rubbing my temple, I realized that I must've bashed my head on something.

"You stayed there." Alice looked up at me then and I saw her eyes misting over with tears. I think she was angry. "You stayed in that underground chamber when that whole fucking place was falling apart."

I licked my lips and leaned back again, a bit away from her. "People break promises all the time, Alice." And suddenly, I could feel my chest hurt at those words. Not the physical pain, it was something inside; a deep hollowness.

Luca broke his promise too. He wasn't here now.

"They do, but what you did was just stupid." She glared at me and something told me that she was forcing herself to not shout at me. "Why would you just want to die?"

Because there was nothing left.

I looked down at the pale blue sweatshirt that I was wearing, it almost looked like one of those hospital gowns. I didn't answer her question, though.

"You're pathetic, Grace." She shook her head, her voice lowering down. "But...I'm glad that you're fine now. I'm really glad."

The numb feeling was slowly dissipating away and I clutched onto the sheets tightly, hoping that would somehow stop it from going away. Whatever this drug was, it made me feel calm, and I liked that numb feeling.

"Can...Can you ask the nurse for more painkillers?" I asked her. Although I didn't feel any pain, I wanted them. I wanted to feel nothing.

She stared back at me and I saw her wiping her tears away. "No. That thing makes you sleep a lot."

"I want to sleep."

"No, you don't." She glared at me and I closed my mouth shut. "You need to have a quick checkup so that you can stand up from this freaking bed and go see your brother."

I blinked at her, trying to hide that I was a bit taken aback. "My brother." I murmured to myself. "Jack's...fine?"

She nodded, and I was glad to see the sad look in her eyes fading away. "He's fine, Grace."

•••••

It took hours before the doctor let me up from that bed. It was then when he told me about the mild concussion and other minor injuries I had, something that he advised I should rest for. The checkup went on for quite some time and it took some more time to convince the nurse to let me see Jack. She agreed, only because the hospital room he was in wasn't that faraway from my own room.

Alice helped me up even though I told her that I was fine. My chest hurt a bit when I stood up and tried to move, but I didn't tell that to anyone. I think Alice knew about it since she was being so insistent to help me walk out.

While we walked, Alice made sure to fill me up with everything that happened after I had passed out in that underground chamber. I had a feeling that she was trying to tell me as little details as she could've—she told me nothing about Burner or Cynthia or even Jonathan.

She kept on repeating that the whole building had collapsed just after they had managed to pull me out, and there were no remains of anything—that's what the police had said when they assessed the damage.

He was gone. Burner was gone.

There was barely anyone in the hallway when Alice stopped in front of a door, making me stop beside her. She looked at me and waited, jerking her chin towards the closed door.

"Aren't you coming inside with me?" I asked her as she let go of my arm.

She exhaled a deep sigh and shook her head. "No. I think...you should talk to him alone."

I didn't ask her anything as she pulled away and sat down on one of the waiting chairs. The nurse hadn't told me much about Jack, telling me that I shouldn't worry about him since he was awake and responding well. Even though I wanted to tell her that I felt too numb to worry about anything right now, I didn't. She wouldn't have believed me anyway.

I pushed open the door and went inside.

I was expecting a lot of things to happen at that moment. I was expecting him to be asleep. I was expecting him to not talk to me. I was even expecting him to not remember me.

But when I entered inside and let the door close shut behind me, I saw that he wasn't sleeping. He was actually wide awake, his eyes fixated on me. For some reason, that rooted me to my spot.

The next few seconds went by as we both went on staring at each other. I could see his face much more clearly now. He looked sickly pale, but he was here.

Jack was here.

I finally broke out from the staring and walked over towards his bed. When I sat down in front of him, a small grimace escaped my lips.

He was still staring at me and even when I tried searching for any expression on his face, I found none. There wasn't even relief.

"Hey, Jack." I whispered, placing my palms over the soft white sheets. His gaze didn't break away from my face and a part inside me started to panic a bit.

Please say something.

"Um, I'm sorry..." I trailed off slowly. "...for not coming here earlier. I didn't—I just found out that you woke up."

He still didn't say anything and I felt dread bubbling inside me. It wasn't too much, but the anxious feeling was there. I opened my mouth but something clenched within my gut and I looked down at my hands, thinking otherwise.

Please say something.

"What happened to your hair?"

I had to stare at him for the next few seconds just to make sure it was really him who said that. Even though my mind was being a bit slow right now, I knew it wasn't me who said it, and there was no one in this room besides us.

"I..." I trailed off, consciously touching my hair.

"It used to be longer." Jack said and this time, I saw his lips move. His voice was low, a bit scratchy. But it was his voice.

I gulped heavily and nodded, ignoring the stinging at the corner of my eyes. "Yeah, I wasn't really liking them long. So I cut them off."

He kept on looking at me and I noticed that his hair –almost the same shade as mine– were longer too, almost falling over his forehead. It made him look older, or maybe I just thought that because I hadn't seen him in so long.

"Your hair's longer too." I told him.

He stopped staring at me and looked down at his lap, not saying anything this time.

"Jack?" Had I said something wrong? Should I have not said anything?

I wanted to go near him and wrap my arms around him. I wanted to tell myself that he was fine. But was he fine?

I sighed heavily and kept my gaze on him. "So, I'm not sure how long you're supposed to—"

"Mum and Dad aren't here, are they?" He asked, looking back at me, his brown eyes showing absolutely nothing.

I blinked at that, backing away a little. He noticed that little movement but the blank expression on his face didn't even waver a bit.

"They told me that they killed them." He murmured, looking at my face, waiting.

I looked down at my hands and realized that they were trembling a little. Maybe it was just the side effect of that drug the nurse had mentioned earlier.

"They told me that they killed you too." His voice sounded even quieter now.

I bit my lower lip and dragged both of my hands along my face. I didn't know what to say to him, I didn't even feel like crying right now. There was this constant heavy feeling in my chest and I felt nauseous.

"I'm so sorry, Jack." I said. Something stung at the corners of my eyes but I knew I wasn't crying.

He didn't say anything in response.

"I tried to find you." My voice lowered down to a whisper when a tear trailed down my chin and I wiped it just as quick. I wasn't crying. "I just couldn't."

"It's fine." He replied in a small voice.

I looked up at him then and scrunched up my forehead. "No, it's not." I shook my head. "I'm sorry that you had to go through this all alone. For two years, Jack. Two years are so...much."

He looked down at his hand again and I saw him fidgeting with the large bandage around his wrist. "It wasn't your fault."

I shook my head again, as if that could somehow stop him from saying that. I wanted to tell him so many things but I didn't know what to say at the same time.

"I...was scared in that place." I heard him hesitate a bit. "But I'm here now. You shouldn't blame yourself."

I rubbed my eyes and they were dry. Just that made me feel a bit angry. Why wasn't I crying?

"Are you trying to make me feel better?" My voice wavered a bit.

He looked at me and I saw his brown eyes widen a bit, the only change of expression I saw on him. "I'm just saying...that it's fine."

I bit the inside of my cheek this time, letting the silence follow his words.

"I was trying to make you feel better too." He added after a while.

I felt my lips curve up in a small smile, but I didn't feel it. Deep down, it just felt like thin needles were piercing my heart.

"I'm sorry, Jack." I forced the words out of my mouth. "I just—do you want me to call the doctor? Have you eaten anything?"

I was a bit too slow to realize that he had scooted closer towards me. I didn't realize it until he wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me.

I froze then, because I really didn't know what to do. What if I hugged him back and he pulled away?

"Jack?" I asked him in a whisper. All I could see were his shaggy blond hair, his face hidden against me.

"I missed you." He murmured. And even though his voice sounded a bit robotic, devoid of any emotion, I still hugged him back. Because that made me feel better, it made me feel like everything was fine and nothing was lost.

We stayed like that for the next hour.

"Grace." He murmured after a while, his voice not too audible.

"Yeah?"

"Did you really get a pet-dog?"

I closed my eyes and smiled against the top of his head. "Yeah."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Jack. He's small and very energetic." I told him. "You'll love him."

He was silent at that, and by the soft rising and falling of his chest against me, I almost thought that he had drifted off to sleep.

"Mum never allowed us to have a pet." He murmured and I wished I could see him smile. Nothing about this felt normal—like old times. Everything felt so different between us. "Dad never bought us one either."

I found myself remembering how much Jack actually loved pets. I hated pets just as much as he loved the thought of having one.

"When can we go back home?" He asked in an even lower voice, but I heard it. "I don't like this place. I don't like the people here."

"They won't hurt you, Jack." I sighed, wrapping a comforting arm around him. "Besides, I am here."

He made a small approving sound at the back of his throat. I was more than relieved to know that he wasn't shutting me out, something that I had been expecting. He was talking to me and I was glad.

"I saw Marleen." He whispered and I stiffened in response, my hand freezing over his hair. "Do you remember her?"

I was starting to feel a bit more nauseous now. Hopefully, it was just the medicine I was on.

"Yeah, Jack." I answered him.

He shifted his head a little on my shoulder. "Are Luc and you still friends?"

I closed my eyes when I felt them stinging a bit at the edges. It was probably because of his hair tickling my eyes.

Luca. Luca. Luca.

"You should take some rest, Jack." I pushed him away a little and he didn't complain. Even my voice sounded odd at this moment. "You sound tired."

He eyed me for a few seconds. "Okay."

I nodded at him and he pulled away before leaning back against the white pillows. "Will you stay here?"

"Yeah. Of course." I nodded again and stood up, before sitting down on the chair beside him.

It didn't even take him more than five minutes to completely doze off and I kept sitting there beside him, looking nowhere and thinking nothing. The silence felt nice for some reason. I knew there were so many things I should be thinking about right now, so many questions I should be asking myself. But I wasn't doing that.

Everything was just blank.

Few minutes later, the door to the room opened and I found myself scrunching back in my chair, almost wanting to hide myself. It was probably Alice and I didn't want to talk about anything.

"Grace." It wasn't Alice.

I looked up at the person in front of me and my breath hitched in response. All of a sudden, my mind was crowding up with the same thoughts that I hadn't been thinking about earlier, all the stuff I didn't want to think about.

I watched as Marleen looked over at Jack's sleeping form before her eyes came back at me. She looked way too exhausted, yet she was still in her work clothes.

Why was she here? Why was she here right now?

I blinked at her but didn't say anything. The effects of that drug were starting to wear off, and really, this was the worst time for this.

"Did he just sleep?" She asked me, her eyes trained over at Jack as she cautiously sat down on his bed, where I had just been sitting.

I still didn't say anything and she must've seen the look on my face, all the overwhelming emotions I felt on the inside. "Grace?"

"I'm sorry." The words blurted out of my mouth almost in a rush. I didn't even know I was saying it until I heard my own voice with my own ears.

She furrowed her brows slightly but then she looked away. I was glad that she looked away. Just as the silence went on stretching into something a bit painful, I spoke up once again,

"I'm sorry, Marleen." I whispered. "It's...my fault. And I'm sorry."

She shook her head and looked back at me. Something tightened inside me when I noticed the sad look in her eyes. It wasn't just sad, it was something so much more. Something that made me wish I could go invisible, something that made me wish to fix so many things that could never be fixed now.

Something that made me wish I could've saved Luca.

"It's not your fault, Grace." She shook her head again, and there wasn't any anger. "Things...happen."

I leaned back against the chair silently.

"I just wish you would've told me earlier." She was still looking at me, and her voice was soft. Gentle. "I didn't even know about your parents." She looked at Jack then. "And Jack."

I wanted to crawl somewhere and just hide for some time.

"And Luc—"

"I'm so sorry." I cut her off, shaking my head at her. I wasn't crying, I really wasn't. But something inside me was crying, almost begging her to not say anything further.

Her eyes were glossed over with tears just like Alice's, and I flinched a little when she looked at me. "I'm not blaming you, Grace. You went through...so much, and it wasn't ever your fault."

It was. It was. It was.

Luca wasn't here and it was my fault. Luca wasn't here and it was his fault too. Luca wasn't here and he was a liar. He broke his promise. Luca left me.

A small shudder escaped my lips and I gulped heavily. I rubbed my eyes and there still weren't any tears. Everything was dry, even my mouth felt dry.

"Do you want to see Luc?" She asked.

I looked at her blankly. Why would she ask me that? Did she not know that this was already hard enough for me? Did she not know that seeing his face would be so much harder than thinking about him?

Especially when he won't even respond.

"I haven't exactly checked up on him since hours," She gently patted the sheets over Jack. "But I think he must be awake right now."

I felt my eyes widening a little at her words. What was she even saying? Why was she even saying that?

"Besides, I think he wanted to see you." She gave me a small, sad smile.

He wants to see me. Luca wants to see me.

"What?" It was a mere whisper. Marleen's tired eyes trailed down to my hands that were clenched into tight fists, and I think I had gone a bit pale too.

"Are you all right?" She asked me, and the worry on her face increased way more than earlier.

I gulped heavily and opened my mouth, but for some reason the words felt stuck in my throat. The air felt suffocating. It felt extremely hard to breathe.

"I need to see him."

•••••

My fingers were visibly trembling when I entered another one of the hospital rooms. Marleen was behind me this time but I clearly didn't feel her presence anywhere near me. I was anxious and trembling and I was afraid as I entered the room.

Luca. Luca. Luca.

Marleen said something behind me in a soft voice. I think I heard few people walking behind me in the hallway too. But it was just that; faint voices in the background.

Because right when I entered the room, I saw Luca's face, and even though he wasn't looking over in our direction, the relief at that moment felt like someone was punching me repeatedly in my gut.

Things went incredibly fast for the next few seconds, almost as if someone out there had clicked on the fast forward button over my life. Or maybe it were just the overwhelming emotions that made me space out for the next few seconds.

The next thing I knew, I wasn't standing near that door. I was really near him with my arms thrown around his neck, and he was sitting on that bed, and my face was completely pressed into his neck, and he was breathing.

He was breathing.

I think that's why I started crying really bad.

"Grace?" He spoke up lightly, sounding a bit taken aback. I was surprised too, because he was talking. And he was alive.

Luca. Luca. Luca.

"Why is she crying?" He sounded confused now, but he still had his arms around me. "Grace, why are you crying?"

Why was he even asking that?

"I don't know. Maybe it's just...everything?" Marleen answered him, and I heard the smile in her voice.

I clutched onto him tightly and felt more tears rolling down my cheeks. Although I knew that he was still injured, I still didn't let go of him. I really couldn't have.

"Hey, it's all fine." He spoke to me. "Don't cry please."

I shook my head and sniffed before another loud sob escaped my lips.

"Mom," He sounded a lot more concerned now, and I couldn't really blame him since I was actually bawling my eyes out. I didn't even know how to stop myself. "Why is she crying so badly?"

Marleen must've been just as confused as him.

"I thought you died." I whimpered against him, loud enough for him to hear. And oh God, even thinking about that made me feel nauseatingly horrible.

He wasn't dead. He wasn't dead.

"God, no." He breathed out a small chuckle and pulled me closer. "I'm not dead, Rose."

I pulled my hands away from his neck and placed them over my face, my head still pressed against his shoulder. I was a mess right now, especially from the inside.

"I thought Alice must've told you." Marleen murmured slowly. "Besides, you looked fine. I thought you already knew."

"I was not fine." I whimpered again, trying to muffle another sob with my hands. I was so close to losing my shit back there, so close to accepting that he was dead.

I had seen his blood. I had seen him not breathing back there. Did they really think I'd somehow come to think that he was still alive?

Luca let out another chuckle and leaned his forehead on top of my head.

"All right, I'll leave you two. I think I've got some work to do anyway." Marleen spoke up with a sigh, then added with a strange sternness in her voice, "And then you've both got some explaining to do."

When she left the room, Luca slowly pushed my hands away and placed his on either side of my face. The same face which was messed up with so many tears. "Grace, I told you I won't leave you."

I sniffed and pushed his hands away from my face, wiping my nose and my eyes with the back of my sleeve.

"Well," I hiccupped. "We both break promises all the time."

He smiled at me and took hold of my hand in his strangely warm ones. Mine were cold, colder than usual. "I don't break my promises with you."

"I just freaked out." I shook my head and looked down at our hands. "You—You weren't breathing and I just expected the worse."

"You always expect the worse." He pointed out, softly caressing the inside of my hand. "Even though I told you I won't leave you."

"How was I supposed to believe you when your blood was like everywhere and you passed out the next instant?" I asked him in disbelief.

He leaned back against the pillow and I noticed the large white bandage wrapped around his stomach when his shirt rid up a little.

I didn't feel so numb anymore. I was thinking normally now, I was feeling normally now. And it felt a bit overwhelming at first.

"It wasn't easy, Luca." I whispered. "It was horrible. I felt so useless. I couldn't have saved you, or Jack, or even Alice. Burner...he even killed Jonathan. He had his men everywhere and then I went to that underground chamber and." I stopped my blabbering and pulled my hand away from his, running it over my face.

"I-I even saw Dad." I whispered, closing my eyes. His face was still visible to me, the smile still memorized in my head. And it saddened me, just because I knew that it was all made up in my head.

Luca inched closer towards me and held my face in his hands once again, before leaning closer and placing a small kiss on my cheek. Almost as if he knew that would break me out of my miserable thoughts. "I get it, Rose. I get it. But everything's fine now. You're here, and I'm here, and everything is completely fine."

I looked back in his warm brown eyes, the same eyes that were already staring at me. Somehow –I really don't know how– his words produced this slight sense of comfort inside me. I believed him.

"Okay?" He asked.

I nodded. "Okay."

He smiled then and something bursted inside me, something really beautiful. I felt happy, and that feeling was so much better than that feeling of numbness.

"Did you talk to him?" He asked, softly caressing the side of my face. "Jack?"

I nodded then. "Yeah. He...He talked to me. I told him about Mum and Dad and he wasn't angry from me." I smiled at him in the end and I felt it this time, because things were sounding so much better now. "He's just a bit different, though. Almost as if—"

"We're gonna fix everything, Rose." Luca cut me off. "Together."

I inhaled deeply and nodded. "Right after we explain everything to Marleen."

He grimaced a little at that and pulled his hands away, running one through his tousled brown curls. "Yeah, about that. I don't think—"

It was my turn to cut him off this time. "We'll tell her everything. She deserves to know."

He eyed me silently for the next few seconds then blew out a sigh. "All right. Whatever you say, Rose." His eyes trailed down to my hand again before he held it and traced his fingers lightly along my bruised knuckles. When he looked up at me, his eyes were twinkling with a somewhat strange emotion. "No more punching people, okay?"

I looked down at my hand and frowned a little in confusion. "What?" I whispered. "Why not?"

"Besides, you're too short to throw punches at tall guys." He ignored my question and gave me a cheeky smile.

The frown left my face when I pondered over his words, and a small laugh escaped my lips. I leaned my forehead against his chest and breathed out another laugh.

This felt so good.

His hand slid into my hair and his fingers softly played with them. "I really like it when you laugh, Rose."

I closed my eyes and found myself thinking back to the day we first met. It was so long ago and I barely remembered anything, even though that was one of my favorite memories.

I smiled and looked up at him, in his eyes. Taking him by surprise, I flicked his forehead. Although it was done halfheartedly, he still scrunched up his nose in pain and rubbed his temple. "You're too violent."

I pulled a bit away from him. "Can't back out now." I said, my eyes trailing down to his lips. Something lurched in my chest and I leaned closer towards him, placing my lips softly over his in a small peck. When I pulled away, I noticed that his eyes looked brighter.

"And you're the only best friend I have." I added in a small, sad whisper. "I can't lose you."

He placed a hand around the back of my neck and pulled me closer once again, kissing me a bit longer this time. I closed my eyes and felt the tight knots in my stomach loosening away with his soft kisses.

"Just best friends?" He pulled away a little.

"Yeah." Maybe it was just the closeness of our faces that made my heart lurch again. "Unless we both die."

"I don't think so, Rose." He smiled against my lips, placing a soft kiss at the corner of my mouth. "We're a forever kind of thing."

As he kissed me once again, I realized that he was right. Even though there were so many things that we went through, there were still a lot left to be fixed. Happiness never came easy, I knew that, and I was fine with it. Because I had all the people I needed right here with me, I had him.

The unnatural feeling in my chest, the happiness bubbling in my stomach, the relief clouding my vision—all of it told me that he was right.

From now on, right here, this would be our forever.

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THE END ♥