{Chapter 12}

Two days passed and both were spent gathering up the strayed cattle from every direction. No one had time to think of anything other than gathering cattle. Toni pushed Mark hard, who pushed the cowboys even harder. They breathed, dreamed, and lived cattle for those forty-eight hours. The morning that marked the day they were back on schedule was a relieving morning.

Erik got up before everyone else that next morning, when only Katie was awake as she prepared breakfast.

“What are you doing up so early, Erik?” she asked.

“Toni still asleep?” Erik asked, ignoring her question.

“She’s stirring” Katie answered.

Erik nodded and went to the back of the chuck wagon where his wife was silently rocking their baby back and forth, humming to him.

“What are you doing up?” she asked him.

Erik shook his head. The similarities between his wife and her cousin were frightening.

“I haven’t seen the little guy in a week,” Erik explained, pulling himself up to sit on the wagon tongue.

Toni smiled and moved to sit beside him. “Guess you haven’t. Here, hold him for a minute.”

Erik took Justin while Toni prepared to give him another feeding. The boy ate every three hours, which didn’t give Toni very much time to rest. She looked completely worn out, not how she usually looked only a week into a cattle drive.

“You’re not getting much sleep, are you?” Erik asked.

“Not as much as I’d like, but I’m not complaining,” Toni replied to him.

Erik sighed. “Wish I could shoulder some of it for you.”

Toni chuckled. “You wanna take the next feeding?”

Erik laughed. “No, I don’t think so.”

Toni laughed and took Justin from his arms. “Justin might not like the way that turns out.”

Erik’s smile broadened at the smile on his wife’s face. He loved her all the more when she had a smile on her face. He had tried for nearly four years to keep it there, but Toni was a hard woman to please.

“Have you rounded up most of the remuda?” Toni asked him as she fed Justin.

“I’ve got all but two of the horses. One was J.T.’s, but the other just wandered off. He’ll turn up before long, I’m sure,” Erik explained.

Toni sighed. “Sure didn’t plan on this stampede.”

“We knew it was a possibility” Erik leaned against the inside wall of the wagon.

“I know. It almost feels like a… like a failure” Toni’s voice trailed off.

Erik turned to fully face her. “This isn’t a failure. Sure, it hasn’t happened before, but it’s not a failure. It’s just a setback. You and I are used to those.”

“I know that, and I agree. My mind’s just trying to tell me a different story, is all” Toni rocked Justin back and forth.

“We’ve always had this problem, haven’t we? Listening to our minds instead of reason?” Erik said pointedly.

Toni huffed. “My mind’s supposed to know reason. It’s supposed to run on reason, to think about reason, to make sure everything that comes in is reasonable.”

“That hardly ever happens” Erik chuckled.

Toni cut her eyes at him.

Erik smiled. There was the temper he was looking for.

“I’m just teasing” he smiled.

Toni looked straight ahead, her brow creasing.

“Your face looks too stressed these days,” he told her.

“Nobody ever said that cattle drives relieved stress did they?” Toni took on that look of determination he had grown so fond of.

“No, they didn’t. There are ways of relieving stress, you know” Erik took on his pointed voice again.

Toni looked over at him. “How’s that?”

Erik smirked.

Toni smiled.

Erik inched closer to her, turned her so that the baby was between them, and pulled her into his arms, kissing her thoroughly. Toni responded, catching up on a week’s worth of kisses that she had lost. They pulled apart, but not too far.

“Did you know that you’re my favorite wife?” Erik asked as sweetly as he thought possible.

Toni smiled again. “Wouldn’t that imply that you’ve had more than one?”

Erik pretended to think. “Well, let me think on that.”

Toni leaned in and kissed him again. She pulled away just enough to lay her head on his shoulder, the baby still between them.

“I never thought I would miss our little family so much. I hope Sandy’s alright,” she said.

Erik sighed. “I’m sure she is. You know how responsible Aubrey is.”

They heard the familiar call to wake up.

“Bacon in the pan, coffee in the pot!”

Erik groaned and removed himself from his wife and baby, sliding off the wagon tongue.

“I love you,” Toni said.

Erik looked back at her. “I love you more.”

“We’ll see about that” Toni narrowed her eyes at him playfully.

Erik stole another quick kiss before walking back toward camp.

Thank you so much for my family, Lord. Heaven knows I don’t deserve them.

**********

Katie kept her eye on Brant at breakfast that morning. She admitted that he did act suspicious, but she didn’t see anything that could convict him of anything. It could be that Adam was just too jumpy after his brother’s death, yet it could be that his years as a lawman had paid off with good instincts.

Adam came into camp shortly after another guard was sent to relieve him. A few strands of his dirty blonde hair had come loose from its short ponytail, and fell in front of his face. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose and he squinted his eyes several times. He was obviously dog-tired.

Katie poured him a cup of coffee and carried it to where he stood a few feet away from the circle around the campfire.

“Here” she handed him the steaming cup of the hot brew.

Adam looked up, taking a moment for his eyes to focus. He smiled and accepted the cup.

“Thanks” he said.

“You don’t look so good,” Katie stated.

“I don’t feel so good” Adam answered her.

Katie sighed. “Adam, I don’t know much about the ways of a cowboy, but I sure know that Mark wouldn’t make you take the midnight watch for five nights in a row. What’s going on?”

She searched his bloodshot, coffee brown eyes for some sort of clue, but found nothing but pure fatigue.

Adam shrugged.

Katie huffed. “I’m gonna talk to him if you don’t tell me.”

Adam looked at her. “You’d make me look like a complete tenderfoot to satisfy your nosiness?”

Katie smirked.

Adam nodded. “You would.”

Katie tapped her foot.

“Fine” Adam sighed. “I can’t sleep most nights.”

“Why? You need your sleep. No cowboy can survive without a good night’s sleep. You’ll fall out of your saddle one of these days” Katie shook her head.

“I don’t know why” Adam said.

You know exactly why, you liar. Adam told himself.

Every time he went to sleep, he relived the exact same scene of his life. Walking right up to a man and shooting him in the face. Blood had splattered all over his clothes, his face, and his gun, yet that didn’t seem to satisfy the need to kill every last member of the gang who caused Joel’s death.

Was it his guilty conscience? Was it his restless need for revenge? Was it fear of seeing the same dream over and over again in his mind?

“Adam, are you okay?” Katie’s concerned voice broke through his thoughts. “You’re about to crush that coffee cup.”

Adam looked at her, at the look of sympathy and concern behind her eyes. While he appreciated the gesture, he didn’t need her sympathy or concern… only death.

His eyes snapped over to where Brant Alexander sat around the fire.

Brant needed to die… again.

Adam didn’t understand or comprehend why the face that he had shot was alive and well only ten feet away from him, but he did understand what he needed to do about it. His hand went to feel his Colt, only to find it wasn’t there.

His hip felt so bare without his holster hanging from it.

“Adam” Katie’s voice was impatient this time.

“Hmm?” Adam snapped out of his trance and looked at her.

Katie stared at him. “Wh- What’s wrong?”

“What do you mean?” Adam asked.

“You… you had this look on your face… it scared me.”

Katie had never seen such a hardened, hateful glare that Adam had sent toward the camp. She couldn’t pinpoint who he was looking at, but whoever it was would probably have tucked tail and ran if he had seen the look that Adam just gave him. Such a glint in his eye that resembled that of pure hatred. When, for that split second, that look had been pinned on her, Katie had never been so afraid in her life.

She didn’t like this Adam.

“I… I…” Adam stammered.

He looked to the ground, then to his left, then to his right.

Katie slipped her hand in his and squeezed. “Are you alright?”

“I… I’m fine” Adam’s words came out as more of a question than a statement.

Katie inwardly shook her head.

This side of Adam would never do for Jane Peters.

**********

Adam mounted his horse and rode out with the rest of the cowboys.

“Adam!” Mark’s voice called.

Adam stopped and turned his horse toward the man.

“Brant told me that you threatened him. This true?” Mark asked.

Adam didn’t reply but clenched his jaw. This was none of Mark’s business.

“Well, let’s just get one thing straight. I’m the law out here. That tin badge you used to have don’t mean a thing. You hurt one of my men in any way, and you’ll answer for it. Understood?” Mark’s condescending voice nearly drove Adam crazy.

Adam knew that Mark was up to something shady, and knew better than to trust the man.

He nodded anyway. “Understood.”

Not that Mark or his authority would stop Adam from what he had to do.

“Good. In the meantime, have fun riding drag today.”

Adam was tempted to groan at that. He mumbled under his breath as Mark rode away and felt himself snarl.

The man was out to get him now, he was sure of it.

Hope you guys liked this chapter!

How do you feel about Adam's need for revenge? Is it understandable, or do you think he's not thinking this through?