Harvard's semester started the day after Labor Day. Although we weren't taking classes yet, Louis and I went to experience the excitement. We just sat on a bench and watched students shuffling, sprinting, and meandering about. I'm pretty sure Louis almost started hyperventilating at one point because he was so excited. He kept saying, "I can't believe it! I can't believe that my dream is coming true!"

It made me happy to know I helped to make it happen. And, to be honest, it made me feel a bit more eager to start my own college career. Now that I was realizing that I didn't want the empty life of a socialite, I was starting to consider what I could study at Harvard. I had no idea what I really wanted to do with my life, but Louis assured me that I didn't have to have it all figured out just yet. I would be spending the first year or two taking basic class requirements that all students have to take. Then I could become more specialized in my area of study.

Louis had spent every night in my room since we moved in. I had no arguments and neither of us felt particularly tempted to go further, physically, than we had already. It seemed enough to have this new freedom to be together without someone looking over our shoulders.

But I wondered how long it would be before Louis thought I was ready to make love. I certainly wanted to, but his reasoning made sense, and I didn't want to push him when he was doing something for my benefit. I knew it wasn't easy for him to wait.

One morning, we were just lying in bed lazily, in no hurry to get up and do anything.  

"Hey, Lou?" I said. "Obviously, we haven't told my parents about us yet, but do your parents know?"

"Hell yeah!" He replied with a grin. "When I went home for that long weekend, they not only practically forced me to accept your Harvard offer, but they told me that I'd better not let you slip away."

I giggled a little bit. "Oh, really? You told your family that we were just friends when we went there for the Fourth of July. How did they get the idea that we were something more?"

Louis rolled on his side to face me. "Because they could see that I was happy for the first time in years."

His words melted my heart a little. But then I looked at him quizzically, trying to figure him out.

"What's that look for?" He asked.

"I just find it odd that I could make you happy. I mean, what's so special about me that sets me apart from a hundred thousand other girls?"

"I can't describe exactly how or why, but the chemistry was obvious when we first met." I nodded. "And when I got to know you, all I had to do was to look into your heart and I fell in love, just like that. You have such a unique beauty. Sure, you had a hard exterior at first, but underneath was this strong and vibrant woman, and all I had to do was coax you a little to come out of your shell. You have such an amazing heart, Ash. You're sweet and thoughtful and you surprise me with your wit."

"Thanks," I said shyly, burying my head into his side. I don't think anyone had ever spoken about me with such generous words before.

After a bit, he changed the subject abruptly. "Are you worried about your mom?"

I thought for a moment. "She's been on my mind a lot. I don't quite know what to think. I mean, it seems like it was my rebellion against her plans for my life that drove her to have some kind of breakdown."

Louis tenderly brushed my hair off of my face and then let his hand rest against my cheek. "Ash, she made her own choices, including the ways that she tried to control your life. You couldn't do anything about that. You grew up and took a stand for your freedom, and if that's what drove her to fall apart, that's not your fault at all."

"Yeah, I guess," I nodded, still feeling guilty.

"I'm sure there were things going inside of her that you never saw, and I'm guessing that a lot of different factors contributed to her breakdown."

"Thanks, Lou," I smiled. "You always make me feel better." I hugged him tightly.

This time, I changed the subject. "Last weekend was unbelievable. When you said we were going to re-live my childhood, you weren't kidding! It was so much fun to go out and celebrate the holiday weekend with you and everyone else, and not have to worry about what people were thinking or whether I was going to get in trouble."

Lou squeezed me. "That's exactly what I hoped it would be. And there's more to come. You can't make up for an entire lost childhood in one weekend."

I pulled back and looked him in the eye. "Is that why we're not having sex yet? I mean I'm not really a child," I said with a wink.

"Well, that's part of it," he admitted. "I just want you to get past some of this junk first. Besides, your dad made sure to give me a stern warning about taking care of you, including bodily protection. I doubt that he would look too kindly on me jumping in bed with you while I'm still on his payroll."

I threw my head back and laughed. "So, we're not having sex because you're afraid of my dad? I promise I won't tell him!"

I kept laughing, but he said, "Not exactly. I did tell him I would protect you, and that means protecting your heart, too." His next words made me shiver, "When I make you mine, I want to make sure every part of yours is mine. And I think your heart is still just a little vulnerable, you know?"

"I know, but I love you," I said. "I won't ever want anyone but you." I kissed him hard, aggressively. I wanted him to know I wasn't a kid who couldn't handle a grown-up thing like sex.

He returned my eagerness, pushing himself firmly into the kiss, caressing my body with his hands.

I pushed my body close to his so that I was pressed right up against him, and then I threw one leg over his and rolled him even closer.

"Ash," he said, half groaning, half laughing. "This isn't making it any easier."

"Good," I laughed, and hopped out of bed.

"You're such a tease," he said, pretending he was pouting.  

"Deal with it, Tomlinson," I laughed. "Now what are we going to do today?"

"Well, Preston and I have Tae Kwon Do in a little while. You could come with us and learn a few things."

"I don't think so," I said, laughing. "I don't think martial arts is my thing. Besides, why would I need to learn self-defense when I have two perfectly capable men ready to defend me?"

He answered me in a more serious tone. "I won't be able to be with you all the time, especially when classes start next semester."

"You're right, but not today, okay?"

"Sure," he said, kissing the top of my head. "I have to go and get ready. We'll be leaving in about half an hour."

After he left my room, I went to take a shower and then I had an exciting idea. While the guys were gone for a few hours, I decided that I would drive into downtown Boston and find my way around, practice my independence and my driving skills.  

I got dressed and ready, made sure I had some cash in my purse, and I took off. It wasn't far to downtown Boston, and since we'd been there a few times, I knew my way, at least to some of the places we'd been.

I parked at a meter and got out, feeling proud of myself for finding my way. I browsed through store windows and took note of the various shops along the street. I went into a jewelry store to see if I could find any of my favorite gems, but they didn't have any lapis. 

I thought for a moment about Richard's alleged lapis mine. I'm sure there was one, and his finacee's family owned it. But I wonder if he ever meant it for me, or if he just made that up for a quick cover up. Maybe he had originally gone down there to start a business for me, but he met Martina when he met her family, and that's how they fell in love.

No, I didn't really believe that. Richard was this twisted, despicable human being, and I'd been foolish to not notice any of his deceitful ways. Who knows what kind of story I'd hear if I spoke to Martina. But I didn't care anymore. I was just glad that he was out of my life.

I stopped into a chocolate shop and bought a few pounds of goodies to take home and share with the guys. I went back to the car, just in time, because my meter was about to expire. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but I felt a little thrill, maybe just from having gotten myself here and that I managed to avoid a ticket. I could really handle this freedom thing!

I pulled out of the parking space and I decided to explore for a bit. I drove for a while, taking note of historic sites and other interesting places. Boston was really a fascinating city.

Soon, though, I noticed that I had no idea where I was. What was worse, I really had no idea in which direction home was. I started to panic a little, realizing I hadn't paid attention to street or highway signs; I'd just been driving for fun, thinking I'd backtrack when I was done. I assumed I'd see buildings or landmarks that would remind me which way to go.

But as I turned around and tried to head in the other direction, I realized that I couldn't exactly find my way back. I was on the verge on crying, but I had to force myself to stay calm. It wouldn't do any good to try to drive with my eyes blurred by tears. I took a few deep breaths as I slowed to a crawl, trying to decide what I should do.

I looked around as I drove slowly and had a sickening realization. Most of the buildings looked abandoned, the sidewalks were broken with weeds popping up through them, and some of the storefronts were boarded up. There was no decent-looking establishment anywhere. If I caught sight of a pub or a restaurant, it looked like a little hole in the landscape of broken down buildings. 

I was in the ghetto. 

I thought about that creep Harry at The Underground and I was terrified that I'd find a hundred of his kind if I dared to stop and ask for directions.

But finally, I realized what had to be done. I saw a restaurant that looked like some kind of Mexican place because the writing was mostly in Spanish. I parked the car and hurried towards the restaurant, but when I got to the doors, they were locked. That was when I saw a small sign indicating the hours. It wouldn't open until 3 PM, and it was only around 1:00.

I had to think. I could just stay there and wait til it opened. I could go back to the car and keep driving, hoping I would eventually come to a nicer neighborhood, but that could lead me further from home. Or what if I ran out of gas? I had no idea to put fuel into the car.

Then I noticed some people coming out of a restaurant about a block away. Instead of getting back in the car, I speed-walked down there, wanting to take advantage of the fact that there were people around. At least there would be witnesses if anything happened to me.  

I went into the establishment and realized it was a dingy, stale-smelling bar. No matter, I wasn't going back outside without some directions. I walked up to the bar and tried to get the attention of the bartender, whose back was turned to me. "Excuse me," I said.

When the man turned around, my face froze as I desperately tried not to react to his appearance. His mouth was slightly curved in, due to a lack of teeth. He had a fine white stubble scattered over his jaw which looked like sugar crystals. His huge nostrils flared when he smiled at me with his toothless grin. "What can I do for ya?" He asked with a definite lisp, again, probably because of the absence of teeth in his mouth.

"Um, I'm sorry to bother you, but I seem to have gotten myself a bit lost. I need to get back to downtown Boston or possibly Cambridge. I just wasn't paying attention to where I was going," I said, feeling silly for having gotten myself into this predicament.

"Well, sweetie, you're a long way from home, you know that?" He asked, laughing hard enough that he expelled a rather smelly bit of breath in my direction.

"I...I know that, sir, but like I said, I got lost." I was near tears and I think he knew I was going to lose it.

"Well, it's not too hard to get back onto the highway," he said kindly. "Sure you don't want a drink first?"

"Umm, no thank you, sir, I just need to find my way home." I didn't think it would do much good for me to have a drink and then try to navigate my way home.

"Well, how about some food? I just threw some onion rings in the fryer."

"No!" I said, trying not to sound as frustrated as I was. "Just directions...please."

He chuckled a little. "All right, you just go back that way," he said, pointing to the direction I'd come from. You keep going straight for about two miles. When you get to Windsor Street, make a right and keep going til you see 93. Get on 93 North and that takes you right past downtown."

I rehearsed the directions in my mind. Back the way I came, right on Windsor til I see 93.

"Thank you so much," I said, overflowing with gratitude. I hurried back out the street and headed to the car. The only problem was that I couldn't see the car. Anywhere. 

I stopped dead in my tracks, thinking frantically about where I'd parked. Did I really get lost just by walking down the street a little way?

I looked around and then I remembered the Mexican restaurant. Yes, I had parked right across from the Mexican restaurant, but the car was gone!

Oh, my god! My car was stolen! I rushed back towards the pub where I'd gotten directions, suddenly feeling far too vulnerable.

I went back to the bar, almost in tears. "My...my car is gone," I said, and soon I was full-on crying.  

"Did your meter expire?" He asked.

"No, there was no meter," I said, trembling.

"Well, then I guess you'd better call the police."

I knew I'd feel foolish for telling Louis that I'd gotten lost, but I wanted to talk to him before I called the police. As soon as I heard his voice, I lost it. "L...Lou," I sobbed.

"Ash! What's wrong? Are you okay?" He was clearly alarmed by my frantic state.

"I'm o...okay, but I'm l...lost...and th...the car..."

"Hold on, honey," he said firmly. "You went out by yourself?"

I was controlling the sobs now, even if I was still crying. "Yes, I'm sorry. I thought I'd be able to find my way back. But I think somebody stole my car."

"Where are you?!" He said, his voice sounding urgent.

"I don't know. Hold on," I said, turning to the bartender. "Where are we?" I asked.

He laughed again and I didn't like it. It felt like he was making fun of me. "2217 Pitchford Street," he finally said.

I gave Louis the address and he assured me that he'd be there within minutes. "Should I call the police?" I asked.

"No, honey, don't call the police yet. Preston and I will be there soon. Don't go anywhere. You stay right where you are, got it?"

"Mmmhmm," I said as I hung up. I slumped onto a bar stool and the old toothless bartender slid a drink down to me.

"Gin and tonic," he said. "On the house. You look like you could use it."

I nodded gratefully and then took a big swig, expecting it to go down like beer. But gin was a hell of a lot stronger than beer and it was very bitter. I coughed a little bit while the bartender laughed at me. I'm sure I was going to be the laughing stock of all his bar cronies when he told them this story again and again and again.

I was just sipping the last bit of my drink, and feeling a little more relaxed, when I heard the door open.

"Louis!" I shouted, running straight into his arms.

"Hey, honey," he said, squeezing me into a tight hug. "Glad you're okay."

I nodded, not saying anything as my hair rubbed up and down against his. I had my face firmly planted into his neck, his scent calming me. I flashed back to that night when he rescued me from Harry. Louis had always made me feel safe.

When I finally pulled away, Louis said, "Okay, show me where you parked and then we'll decide on what to do next."

I said thank you to the bartender and left with Louis' arm securely around me, and Preston bringing up the rear. We walked the block to the Mexican restaurant and then I pointed to the place where I'd parked, across the street.

Louis bit his lip at that point, trying not to laugh, and Preston was holding back laughter, too.

"What?" I demanded defensively. "Everyone keeps laughing at me. I don't know how this is funny!"

Louis pulled me tighter against him and spoke through his laughter. "Honey, that curb is painted red," he said.

"So what?"

"It's a no parking zone. Your car got towed away."

"What?!" I asked in shock. "They can't do that! Do I get it back?!"

He and Preston couldn't control themselves anymore, but I was angry at them for laughing at me. Finally, Louis regained control and said, "We have to find out where they towed it, and then you'll have to pay to get it back."

"How much?" I asked.

"Probably a couple hundred bucks," Preston said.

"Fine," I said. "Can we just go home and make some phone calls? I'd like to get out of this neighborhood as soon as possible."

"Of course," he chuckled. "You're just so damn cute, even when you're clueless."

"I am not clueless," I snapped. "I just haven't learned all the rules of driving yet."

Louis opened the door for me, then he slid into the back seat beside me.

"Well, I'm glad I didn't call the police then," I huffed. "I would have been even more humiliated than I already am."

"And you might have gotten a really big ticket because you don't have a license yet. You could have even gotten arrested, but I don't know the law here."

I felt the blood drain from my face. "Arrested?"

"Everything's okay now. I guess we'll have to get you a driver's license soon," he assured me. "And a map," he laughed.

He pulled me into his arms and held me.

About half way there, I said, "Lou, I don't like it when you make fun of me. I know that I'm kind of a screw up, but I'm trying."

He squeezed my shoulders and quietly said, "You're not a screw up. Sometimes I think you're too brave for your own good. I'm sorry for laughing at you." Then he kissed the top of my head.

When we got home, it only took a few phone calls to find out where my car was impounded. Louis and Preston offered to go and get it, so I just stayed home and took a hot bath.

I loved hot baths. I missed my over-sized tub at home, but the one here was spacious enough for the task at hand.

I dumped a generous amount of bubble bath into the tub and let the steaming water turn it into a fragrant, bubbly escape. When it was deep enough, I slid down into the water and closed my eyes.

With a sudden jolt, I realized that I hadn't closed the bathroom door leading to my bedroom. I used to do that all the time at home because no one ever came into my bedroom except Danielle. But now I lived with two guys. Even though they were out retrieving my car, I had no idea how long it would take them. When I realized that the bedroom door was shut securely, I relaxed again. I closed my eyes and let the hot water soothe me.  

I must have drifted off because the next thing I knew, Louis' voice snapped me back into consciousness. "Ash?"

"Louis!" I shrieked, grabbing my towel and throwing it over me in the tub.

He had just been coming into the bedroom when he realized I was naked in the tub. He stopped in his tracks.

"Don't you knock?"

"I'm sorry, honey. I did knock, but you didn't answer, so I thought you were napping."

"I was," I admitted sheepishly.

He locked the bedroom door and he started walking towards me.

"What are you doing? I'm...naked!"

He didn't say anything, but I watched him like a hawk as he got closer. When he got to the edge of the tub, he chuckled at the sight of my big fluffy bath towel, strategically floating in the water. "You're supposed to use that after you get out of the tub," he teased.

He pulled the sopping towel off of me and threw it into the hamper. "Louis!" I said in a quiet gasp.

He knelt down next to the tub and swished his hands around in the water. "Do you want more bubbles?" He asked.

I nodded, feeling very unprepared for what he was doing, just sitting there, admiring my body through the disappearing bubbles. I wasn't quite sure how to react. This was very real, and a little unnerving.

As he poured the bubble gel in and made it froth up with his hands, I watched him intently. He was looking...looking at my naked body. It felt so strange. No man had ever seen this much of me, and suddenly, Louis was seeing it all.

My heart raced as his eyes scanned over my skin. It was erotic somehow, having him see me like this, not even touching, just looking and appreciating.

Soon there were enough bubbles that they covered everything once again.

I gulped nervously, wondering what he was going to do next. He leaned over the tub and kissed me with longing, his mouth moving with such expertise that he literally took my breath away. I ran my wet hands through his hair as we kissed, and he groaned at my touch.

"Louis," I panted as he kissed my neck gingerly, and then my shoulder. And then suddenly, he stood up and walked over to the cabinet. He opened it and pulled out a fresh towel. I held my hand out for him to give it to me, but he just shook his head. "Uh, uh. Stand up."

"What are you doing?" I asked in surprised whisper.

"It's all right, I'm just going to help you dry off," he said softly.

I thought about how I'd been challenging myself to be more open to showing off my body during the summer, trying to work up the courage to have sex with Richard, a man I didn't even love. And now, here Louis was, being so tender with me that I couldn't help but feel safe.

I stood up, and of course, he watched me, but he didn't ogle me. It was like he was looking at all of me, not just all of my body, but all of me, as if he could somehow see who I was just a little better without the barrier of clothing.

I stepped onto the bath mat and he wrapped the towel around me, using the ends to dry my arms and legs, well at least what he could reach. He grabbed my robe from the back of the door and draped it over my shoulders. I slipped my arms into the sleeves, and then, as the towel fell away, I closed the robe and tied it shut. Louis dried my hair, and my feet, which he hadn't been able to reach with the towel before.

"You saw me naked," I whispered. "That was unexpected."

He lifted my face to look right into his eyes. "I was so scared when you called me today. Terrified, actually. I was afraid you were hurt."

I could see from the look on his face that his fear was genuine.

He continued, "Just now, if anyone else walked in on you while you were in the tub, I probably would have punched them." I breathed out a small laugh, and he kept going. "But you were completely vulnerable, and I...I don't know. I wanted to show you in some way that I have every intention of protecting you and taking care of you. You were completely exposed to me, but I would never, ever hurt you. I just want you to know that. Does that even make sense?"

I gulped again and nodded. 

"Yeah, it does."