"This is weird," I said aloud.

"You're right," Fisher jumped in.

Untangling myself from him felt like taking off something that I wasn't supposed to be wearing.

"Never again. Please." I stared him down in case his face was saying otherwise. "I'm not comfortable with that."

"Of course." I didn't realize how long Fisher had stopped crying, but his eyes were still red and puffy. "You're definitely not a cute crier," I added.

He cracked a smile and tried to kick me while on the chair. "Shut up."

I leaped back, laughing as the awkward tension in the room disappeared. I walked backwards towards my bed and sat down. "Now that we got the waterworks out of the way, let's talk."

His smile faltered a bit and I watched his mood darken. "Yeah. Emma came over last night and told me she wanted to end it. She didn't want to be with someone who was telling the world he was dating someone else."

The back of my neck heated up. Was this my fault? Guilt started eating my stomach and I didn't know what to say except, "Sorry."

Fisher continued, "I told her I'd tell everyone that Leia and I weren't dating. I didn't want to break up with Emma. I really didn't. But she said what I did in the alley – how that was my impulse to lie about our relationship because I was so scared for anyone to know about us – apparently showed what my intentions were."

I wasn't sure again if I was supposed to say anything but letting him speak seemed like the right thing to do.

"I told her, 'What if we tell the world we're dating: Emma and Fisher.' And she said it was too late. The damage was done. Plus, she said I was right – there would be too much pressure, they'd be all over us, any privacy we had left would be gone."

I reached over for the tissue box to my bedside table and tossed it to Fisher.

"And I don't know what to do. Everything feels like a mess and I don't know how to fix it."

A laugh slipped out of mouth. "That's the most human thing I've heard from you all day."

"Help me," he pleaded. He used the same desperate voice from when we first met at the diner. A voice I was familiar to hearing throughout my life.

One where you could tell it feels like someone has a hand around their neck and they were afraid for what was to happen next and are trapped in this thirst for something that they want to hear; hopeless and are silently pleading to get rid of this unwanted desperation.

It's dangling at the edge of a cliff, staring down at defeat begging you take one step forward.

I was way to familiar with this voice.

"I...I uh..."

I don't know how.

I thought about how I escaped it last time. And almost laughed out loud because I didn't escape. I took one huge jump forward and trusted the darkness—that it would hold be tighter and actually wanted me as opposed to the person that didn't.

And I knew I couldn't say that to Fisher.

So I tell him what everyone else says when they didn't know what to say.

"We'll get through this together. Don't worry – it will all work out."

I was pretty sure I cringed to hear such crap come out of my mouth. Maybe I was better off staying silent.

I waited for him to throw a pillow at me or sob that wasn't true.

Fisher nodded and I was surprised as he said, "Yeah. I agree. I mean, the whole cousins thing is maybe a sign that it isn't meant to work out between us. Things happen for a reason."

He paused and for a moment, I thought he had it all together until he dropped his face into his hands again. "God, you don't understand. I loved her so fucking much."

I wondered what that felt like. The only people I was ever interested in were shitty people. I guess it felt different to breakup with an asshole as opposed to a good person.

At least with the asshole, you know you were better off without him so there was something to look forward to when it came to moving on.

But if you were letting go of a good person, it was like losing an opportunity for a better life.

"Enough...enough about me." He sniffed and I knew he was swallowing down another sob. "How have you been? How's the business going. Now that we're not on a contract anymore, do you have any clients?"

He was trying so hard to change the subject. And if there was one thing I learned about people when they were spiraling, let them direct the conversation. Once they calm down, they try to stir it in the right direction. Some people just need to spiral.

"Uh, it's good. I have an appointment with a young guy named Will tomorrow night."

Fisher wiped the back of his hand across his nose and rubbed into the tissue. "William? That snob? Are you sure all he wants is a thirdwheel date or something more?"

I shrugged a bit. "I'll find out tomorrow. His assistant called me and when I asked about what he was looking for, she said I'd know when I got there and that I had nothing to worry about."

Fisher looked like he wanted to throw a brick at me. "Leia. Does that not sound sketchy to you? Are you sure he isn't asking for something that's out of your comfort zone?"

"I can handle myself thank you very much. I'll leave if it's bad. I'm not an idiot. I can take care of myself." Was it because I was smaller than the average woman? Why did so many people have the need to take care of me?

"I know, I know. William is just a dick so I'm just warning you like any good friend who knows the guy she's seeing sucks."

"I'm not seeing him. This is business."

"Have you ever seen anyone?"

Panic set into my chest and I froze. I didn't need to play dumb and ask what that meant. Had I ever dated someone?

"Leia, have you been on a date before?"

"No."

Have I had my heart ripped out of my chest before?

Yes.

"I don't need pity. There's nothing wrong with being seventeen and have never been dated. It's normal." I casually mentioned it as if it wasn't a big deal, which it wasn't.

I shrugged again. "Seriously, I'm in no rush to date someone. Plus, I've seen many dates if you haven't noticed. I can tell you that I'm not missing much."

Fisher raised his hands up in defense. "I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm just surprised."

I lifted a brow and stared at him questionably. "Why?"

He brought his legs towards his chest, hugging his knees. "I don't know. You're pretty. You could land a guy."

I felt like there were so many things wrong with that sentence. God, I knew there was.

"Landing a guy isn't a problem. Being pretty has nothing to do with whether I can or can't get a date. Meeting someone is all about the right time and place."

He kept his arms up. "Okay, okay. You don't need to bite my head off."

"I'm not biting your head off," I snapped. As soon as it came out of my mouth, I relaxed my shoulders and just fell back onto the bed. "Can we not talk about me right now?"

"Sure."

I could tell he didn't want to talk about himself either, so we decided on silence.

After a comforting five minutes, Fisher quietly asked, "If I told your brother I thought he was cute, do you think he'd die?"

"It'd send him straight to heaven," I said.

**

A/N:

Regularly writing is something I'm trying to get into now. Hopefully I get can you frequent updates – I'm thinking every 3 days?

Also, I really want to get to know my readers on a name basis. We're all friends here and I can't thank you all enough for the love and support you've given me and this book.

Comment your name and something about yourself – tell me something you'd want me to know and I'll reply back. :)

Love you so much,

Kisses from Canada – 3pointt14