We pull up to this unfamiliar Hotel, but it's the only one I can find close enough to my aunts. I still can't believe I thought any of this was a good idea, I don't know why I let it get this far. All I feel like doing now is turning the car around and getting myself out of this mess, but I can't...I did this to myself. 

This is so hard, so hard. 

We all pile out of the car and Harry offers to pay for the rooms. We all nod, not truly caring who payed, we just want some sleep. Once Harry makes the arrangements, he gets Niall and I a room to ourselves and one for him and Louis to share. Once Harry hands Niall and I our keys, we hurry to the room. 

Once I unlock the door I plop down on the king size mattress and stretch, making myself comfortable. I yawn and rub my eyes as Niall shuts the door behind him. 

"Comfortable?" He chuckles as I nod. 

"Very" I say as a smile spreads across my cheeks. "Do you mind if I wear your shirt to bed?" I say without thinking, mentally slapping myself. I feel my face redden, and I bite my lip while looking away from him. 

I still haven't explained my actions from earlier today. I shouldn't have made him leave. I still can't believe he went out, got himself drunk, and got into a fight. This is all so unlike him, but I some how feel guilty for all of it, I made him do those things. 

I made him get into a fight with someone, he hasn't told me who, and I hope he just didn't beat up someone for no reason. Knowing Niall, he would have a reason to hurt someone physically, and he wouldn't just hurt a random person. 

"Um sure" he seems taken back from my words, but he takes his shirt off and tosses it to me. I give him a lazy smile, but he doesn't return it. A frown tugs on my lips and I look down onto my lap. I get up quickly and slide my pants down my legs. I pull off my shirt, exposing the red lace bra I picked out earlier. I hear something drop from behind me and I see Niall picking up a trash can that got knocked over. He looks up at me and keeps his head low as he clears his throat. 

"Can you please put on something" he swallows as I look away, tugging his plain white tee over my head. 

"Sorry" I breathe as he grabs some pillows from the bed and tosses them to the floor. 

 "Goodnight" he says, what is he doing?

"Niall you don't have to sleep on the floor this bed is huge" I say as he rolls his eyes. 

"I'm sorry but i don't want you to use me as your personal punching bag" he scoffs as my mouth hangs open.

"Niall what are you talking about?" He is extremely honest and harsh when he's drunk. I can't believe this. 

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about Kate" he pauses as he starts to cry. Woah and emotional when he's drunk. "Everytime I pour my heart to you, you squash it like a bug. If I sleep with you tonight you'll just go right ahead to leading me on and then squashing me again. I don't like the squashing" he cries, wiping his eyes to dry the tears. 

"Niall you are just drunk" I soothe moving over to him and hugging him. 

"I'm not drunk anymore, if anything, Harry flirting with you sobered me up" My heart sinks, he's meant every word he said, have I been so cold to him all this time? 

"I'm sorry" I squeak tucking a strand of my brown hair behind my ear. I want to say more but I can't, I can't find my voice. 

"I don't understand how I love you so much. The way your hair is all straight but the ends of your hair, the way your freckles bring out that taunting blue in your eyes, the way you smile when I say something cheesy, or how shy you get when I complement you, the way you tug on the ends of your shirt when you're wearing nothing else...maybe you think I'll look away, but I won't because you're so god damned beautiful. I don't think I could imagine anyone else to look at for the rest of my life, because I would choose you over and over again. I choose you, Caitriona Aimee Walsh" he finishes as I lean on the dresser. 

I love him so much my heart aches like hell. I began to cry, covering my mouth from letting out a sob. I'm incredibly scared, I'm scared about telling him about Emilia, Liam, and I'm more scared to agree how much I love him. I'm afraid he'll leave me by tomorrow, after all of this, after all of my secrets have been exposed. 

But you can't choose love, it chooses you. 

"Please don't tell me you can't, because I know you can, I know you're scared but-" 

"Just kiss me" I cut him off, as a single tear rolls down my cheek. Without hesitation, he presses his lips to mine. 

A/N: pineapple, Pineapple, PINEAPPLE

He pushes me against the dresser and his hands rest on my waist. My hands tangle themselves into his hair and he bites my lip. So many things travel in my mind, but I push them away as Niall lifts my legs up and wraps them around his waist. His hands travel up my shirt as he sucks on my neck, probably leaving a mark. I bite my lip to try to control my moans since Harry and Louis are in the room next door. Niall reads my mind and mumbles against my skin. 

"Just let it out, I want them to hear what I can do to you" he says seductively as I moan out loud. "Mm that's my girl" he smiles against my skin as I loosen the belt in his jeans and tug them down. He reconnects his lips with mine as he pulls off my shirt. He groans and carries me to the mattress without breaking the kiss, and lowering us slightly on the sea of pillows and blankets. 

Since Liam, I've been waiting for the right guy instead of jumping into something as fast as I did before. In these past weeks, I've realized that this guy is Niall. I haven't done it with anyone for almost three years. I wouldn't even let Ronan get into my pants, no matter how hot he was. My fear is getting pregnant again, or even falling for someone again, Liam brought so much fear into my life, so much fear that I am willing to risk now, here with Niall. 

"I want to.." I trail off mumbling against his lips as he stops for a moment and looks down at me.  He straddles my waist as I place my hands over his. 

"Are you sure?" His accent is rich, and so sexy. I nod as he kisses me again and reaches behind me. I arch my back as he unclasps my bra, dropping it beside the bed. He kisses just below my ear and I gasp at his warm lips. I tug on his hair as he messages my breasts, he lets out a moan as my hands travel down his chest and rest on the band of his boxers. 

"Don't tease me or else I'll tease you" he mumbles against my collarbone. I feel his hands tug on my panties and begin to draw patterns on my hot skin. I groan and pull down his boxers. He slides them off and reaches down beside the bed, once his head comes up I notice he's holding a shiny silver packet. He opens it and slides the condom down his length. 

He pulls down my panties and throws them across the room. He brings his lips to my core and I gasp a little at the connection. He holds my legs down as he kisses me, his tongue slides into me and I moan, gripping onto the pillow above my head. 

"Niall" I whine as he chuckles against my skin. He removes his lips and straddles me again. He brings his head to the crook of my neck and kisses under my jaw.

"This may hurt a little tomorrow, I'm not going easy on you" he says seductively into my ear as I moan again. He pushes himself into me and he lets out a loud moan, followed by a "fuck" once he recovers, he lives up to his word and pounds into me at a fast, ferocious, pace. To be honest I've never done it this hard, but it feels so good. I tug on his hair hard, trying to control my body from my constant moans and spasms. Niall does the same, tugging on the pillows from behind me. My hands travel to his back as I let out another moan. My fingers dig into his skin and I feel so much pleasure consume my body. I let out a loud embarrassing moan, that I will regret tomorrow, but I don't care now. 

"I think I'm about to-" he says as we both release and our moans echo off the walls. He falls to my side and pulls a blanket over our bodies. He pulls me into his arms and kisses my temple. I cuddle closely into his chest and shut my eyes, before I realize what I'm saying I blurt, "I love you" 

//

Hope you liked it 

As always, 

-ily xx