Why did it have to be me? Why did it have to pull me into its grasp? Why did it have to make me feel this way? Why doesn't anyone understand? All this question of why, yet they don't get answered. "Life is hard so deal with it" we all have heard this. Yes I understand it is hard I didn't want to be this way. Suffering though my depression, my invisible illness! I didn't want to cause trouble for anyone, yet I did not on purpose but on accident.
Everyone has their own challenges. Yet why oh why did mine have to be this???
I can barley handle my life, I feel like I don't have a grasp on my own wheel of life. I doubt anyone feels the way I do. I fell like I shouldn't be going though my depression and anxiety and sucidal thoughts. Yet I do, I have to have a fake smile on 24/7, I have to fake my personality. And God forbid that I show my true self at all. Why can I control my life the way I want to. Why does life have to have its way with me. Why does everyone lie to me???? Why do that's tell me I have changed their life. Now I feel like I should own up to the Title of Best person to see to lead you the right way. I know I used to be a leader and a excited and joyful person. But now that person is no where in sight. Why because her own mind is tearing her down to bits and pieces. Why did God have to bless me with life when I could've just died when I was born? Why did I have to live? Why did he let me live and go though these problems that I can't handle? Is he trying to test my strength because if he is I quit for one reason alone I can't handle it. No matter how much in couragement I get I quit God do you hear me I quit so just give up on me already I am a lost cause here. Why do you keep holding on??? Why ???